Other Side of Hatred
by Crazy Chick 74
Summary: Follows the story arc from Unfinished Business through to Take a Break from All Your Worries.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** I've finally finished another fic - so will now start posting it. This has taken me ages to write (I started it when I got stuck with Release). I began it shortly after the end of Season 3. The story follows the arc from Unfinished Business through to Take a Break from All Your Worries. I saw Unfinished Business and was really excited at the prospect of Kara and Lee being together... and then it sort of fizzled out into nothing. This is my take on what could (should) have happened. I hope you like it. The title of the story is from a line Dee says in the extended version of Unfinished Business. There are five chapters to the story (one for each episode in the arc) but I've had to break some of them down in many parts.

Please review.

**Chapter 1: Finishing Business.**

**Part 1.**

This was all kinds of wrong. She knew that even when she heard the hatch close behind him as he entered the room. They'd be hurting so many people, never mind what they'd do to each other. The propensity to hurt each other had never been something they'd lacked in all the time they'd known each other. What they were about to do was wrong, she knew it and he sure as hell did too; but that didn't mean it wasn't going to happen. They were both here and she could only take that as a good sign. When all was said and done, she didn't care about the consequences. She needed this; she needed him.

Since her return from New Caprica things between them had been difficult. She almost laughed as she realized that could possibly be classified as about the biggest understatement in the history of the Twelve Colonies, but nevertheless it was true. She'd often seen loathing written all over his face each time he'd had the misfortune to be in her presence since the Exodus. She wasn't sure she blamed him either. What she'd done to him all those months ago was nothing short of cruel. She hardly understood it herself; how could she expect him to comprehend what she'd done.

Of course her actions had dire consequences on their already strained… relationship, for want of a better word. She didn't completely regret what she'd done; that she'd hurt him, of that she was sorry but regretting marrying Sam was something she just couldn't make herself do, even now. How could she? He was a wonderful man who cared for her deeply, as she did for him. Their time together when she'd first met him back on Caprica had really affected her. If she hadn't got together with him during that brief time, she knew things would've probably been different between her and Lee. She remembered when she'd told Lee she was hung up on Sam. That evening was when things between the two of them truly changed; again. She'd managed to hurt him that night as well.

And now here they were. Possibly about to make another change to their… whatever it was; it would be far too difficult (or maybe it'd be too easy) to put a name to it. Maybe it was beyond definition. She could feel his presence in the room, even though she had her back to him. She'd always been able to sense when he was near. Even though he'd entered the room and they probably both had a pretty good idea what they what was about to happen, Kara knew he was giving her space; he was leaving any decision about down to her. He probably thought she was going to run away from this; again. Would she? Even she wasn't sure.

She slowly turned to face the object of her thoughts. He was leaning against the hatch he'd just closed. She could see a bar had been dogged through the handle; they weren't going to be disturbed. Her eyes moved to his face. It was marred with bruises; the result of the dance just hours earlier but even with the mess to his face he looked better than he had in a long time. It managed to make his face all the more attractive somehow. There was a cut above his left eye resulting from a right hook during the fight with Helo. The cut on his right cheek… well, that had been all her.

Of course, he'd done his damage to her as well; it certainly wasn't as a result of her bout with Hotdog. Lee'd broken her nose and she was now sporting the beginnings of two black eyes. It certainly added to her looks, she thought acerbically. Looking at his face now though, there was an intensity to it that told her he didn't seem to mind. No, his face definitely didn't look bothered at all; in fact it looked anything but.

****

Foreplay was the word that sprang to mind as Kara thought back to their fight. There had been tension between them as soon as he'd noticed her arrival. He was already mid-fight with Karl by the time she came to the dance and he hadn't seen her straightaway. It had been a while before she was aware of him as well. She was just making her way down to the action when she realized it was him in the ring. It was with a predatory stare that she'd looked down at him, taking the opportunity to appreciate the view of the two men doing battle with each other; it was a sight to behold. She needed to get closer in order to be nearer to him. She stood at the side of the ring watching both men as they continued to circle around each other, relentlessly throwing punches. Watching him, she'd been captivated once more. She made a joke to Athena as she stood there; at his expense naturally; a quick jibe about having to roll him into the ring a couple of months ago. Kara hoped that covered the fact she was staring at him; still appreciating for the first time in such a long while just how good he looked. A small frisson of something she tried not to dwell on made its way through her as she'd watched him. She'd been distracted from the sight briefly as she noticed the Admiral and his daughter-in-law enter the room and make their way to the edge of the ring. She tried to quell the wave of dismay she felt on seeing his wife looking at him much the same as she was. Both women were the same in many ways, both wanted what they didn't have. The only difference being Dee was a hell of a lot closer to getting it than Kara was. And it was only Kara that was to blame for it being that way.

Everything between them seemed to change once Lee's fight with Helo ended soon after. Kara had tried to encourage him to get up when he was knocked down by Karl and they'd stared at each other after he'd fallen to his knees, but the fight was stopped by Cottle anyway. Kara's eyes followed him as he made his way to the box at the side of the room; a smirk easily evident on her face. A smirk that disappeared as she realized he was about to retrieve his tags and leave. She walked over to him, getting close enough she could almost taste the sweat on the surface of his skin. She said something she knew would hit the mark, she could even remember what it was now but it worked very effectively. He was pissed off, Kara could tell just from the way he was standing and she knew that somehow she was to blame for it. But then, when wasn't it her fault? Everything she did seemed to piss him off one way or another, especially in the last few months although even she knew he had more than enough reason to be angry with her. The conversation they had as they stood there just pissed him off further; somehow though she had managed to get him to stay. She was further pleased when after she'd put her tags into the box; laying an open challenge at his feet, he replaced his, dropping them directly on top of hers as he continued to stare at her; the look on his face intensifying the heat that had already built between them and was beginning to take over the whole room.

****

"Lee," she spoke for the first time since he'd entered the room, taking a couple of tentative steps towards him, starting to make her way across towards him. Her words faltered along with her steps, as she realized she had no idea what she wanted to say. Where to start? Shifting slightly from one foot to the other she tried to work out what to do. She didn't want to frak this up and chances were she was about to. In the biggest way possible.

The corners of his mouth lifted in the smallest of smiles as he studied her before him. He pushed away from the wall and took the few steps to stand in front of her; very close and yet not close enough. She stared at him, an uncertain look on her face that he found strangely enticing. "Kara," his voice barely a whisper, "I really did miss you, you know." He pulled her into a hug reminiscent to the one they'd shared at the dance, as he echoed the words they'd both said just hours ago.

"I'm sorry, Lee." It was a lame apology but all she could come up with. She wasn't even sure if he knew what she was apologizing for; but then she was entirely convinced she knew either. It was a step in the right direction though. She wrapped her arms around his body, trying to bring the two of them even closer to one another.

They stood that way for several minutes, just reveling in the closeness. Eventually they pulled apart, though still remaining close to each other. His arms, which had been wrapped tightly around her body, loosened and gradually slid down her back until each of his hands held one of hers. He stared into her eyes, his thumbs gently traced circles on the back of her hands. His face was clouded with emotion and he seemed to be struggling to find words just as much as she was. She still really didn't know where this was going. She hoped it would go a certain way; truly she did, but she was also scared at the prospect of it doing just that. Scared of rejection; scared of losing the one thing she needed more now than she ever had; scared of not being in control. More than anything though she was scared that once they started down the path they seemed destined to navigate; there'd be no turning back. They'd been here before, it hadn't worked then and she'd come very close to losing him completely. They just seemed to have repaired some of the damage caused all those months ago; did they really want to risk losing everything all over again? Could either of them cope with losing the other some time in the future?

Lee seemed to come to some resolution before she could as he tugged on both her hands, pulling her further towards him. His mouth moved to meet hers and electricity sparked between them as both gave into the passion that had been building for such a long time. Building for a lot longer than either of them would ever admit. She kissed him back in earnest, finally giving in to the inevitable and realizing it wasn't anywhere near as difficult as she'd thought it would be.

After some time the kiss ended and they reluctantly pulled apart, staring deeply into each other eyes as they both fought for air. Lee raised one of his hands and brought it to her face. He caressed her cheek as she continued to stare into the piercing blue eyes before her. Both of them were struggling to rein control of emotions that were threatening to overwhelm them. Again his words were barely a whisper when he spoke, "What are we doing, Kara?"

"I've no idea. Making everything real complicated again." She paused. "Do you want this to stop?" As soon as she uttered the question she mentally kicked herself. What was she thinking; what possessed her to ask that? She was frakking this up, just as she'd anticipated. She was worried about what he'd say; how he'd answer. Did she really want to know? She was fairly sure she didn't, because she knew in her heart what he was going to say. She knew this wasn't how Lee behaved. He was better than this. He was a married man and he wouldn't do this to his wife. She'd just given him the perfect opportunity to get out of this and she hated herself for it. She looked away from him, scared to see the rejection of her that was sure to be written all over his face. She stood there for a while; waiting for him to say what she dreaded to hear; but at the same time desperate for him to say something to fill the empty void that was taking over the room.

Lee looked at her, absorbing what she'd just asked him. He could see she'd regretted saying it as soon as she'd spoken; could see her starting to withdraw from him. He was more than aware she was expecting him to answer with a positive response; that he'd say he wanted this to stop. For just a few seconds he thought he was going to as well. But could he really say he didn't want this? This was Starbuck. It was Kara. The woman that was embedded so deep in his heart he wasn't sure he knew how to function without her. He'd experienced that for many months in recent times and to put it frankly he'd barely survived it. As a result he'd also made the lives of everyone else around him pretty miserable at the same time. He'd known what was likely to happen when he'd entered the room and he still came. Yes, he was married and he loved Dee but she wasn't Kara. Kara had put it so eloquently earlier; Dee was second best and always would be. The way he felt about Kara was far too difficult to put into words but he'd always, on some level, felt this way about her and he couldn't see that ever changing. Even after everything she'd done to him.

He continued to look at her as she stood there in front of him. For the first time he truly saw the changes that had been evident in her since she'd gone down to the surface of New Caprica. She'd cut her hair since she'd returned to the Battlestar and she now looked more like the Kara he remembered when he'd first arrived on Galactica, but there were subtle changes. She appeared harder than she'd done before she'd moved down to the planet; the hardness was counterbalanced by a vulnerability that shone through. Most people probably wouldn't see it; but he knew her so well. He couldn't begin to imagine what she'd gone through down on the surface, although he knew with certainty she'd been through a lot. He knew little of what had gone on down on New Caprica but he knew she'd been held by the Cylons for the length of the occupation. And he was more than aware of the Cylons infatuation with her, one of them more than any other model. If he was being honest with himself, and these days that didn't happen very often, he really didn't want to know how they'd suffered; how she'd suffered. He'd purposefully avoided reading any of the details of those few months. He wasn't sure he could handle finding out about the pain she'd gone through; he felt his own guilt at what had happened begin to gnaw away at him. It was his idea to leave them behind; to run from the Cylons when they'd first shown up. He'd left everyone to suffer the consequences of his decision; left her at the mercy of the enemy.

She wasn't the only one who'd changed. The year spent above the planet had changed him in more ways than one. He'd had the command of his own ship; only having to answer to one man. When he'd first been put in charge of Pegasus, he took command with a certain amount of reluctance, but as the months passed he had become more confident. Led on by a desire to be respected by his then dwindling crew, he'd spent the time learning to deal with the responsibilities that had been thrust upon him. He never considered the prospect of leaving the military; of living on the planet; it just wasn't an option that entered his mind, which seemed ironic thinking about it now. He'd only joined the military because his father had wanted him to. Well that and so he could fly. Yet he'd always resented it so much because it'd stolen his father away from both him and his brother for so much of their childhoods. When the war first began, being in the military was something Lee hadn't really wanted. He was on the verge of quitting and then the Cylons attacked and everything changed. After that leaving wasn't really an option; they'd needed all the pilots they could get. So it seemed he was more like his father than he would care to admit, recent times had definitely shown that. However since the exodus he was struggling to fit back into the current command structure. He was no longer Commander of his own ship having sacrificed it in order to retrieve people from New Caprica and to ensure the escape of Galactica and he was now back to being just the CAG and he had to admit he was finding it much more difficult that he'd thought he would.

His hand instinctively moved once more to her face and he caressed the curve of her cheek, seemingly never growing tired of doing so. His fingers moved strands of her hair back from her face as he moved closer to her. "I don't want this to stop." Her head spun to look at him, fear washing over her face at his words. The temperature of the room seemed to increase slightly as their eyes met once more.

Tears came to Kara's eyes as the impact of his words filtered into her brain. He wanted this; he wanted her. After everything she'd done to him, he still wanted her. Their lips met once more, both of them battling the other once again, trying to retain control of what was happening. The battle was no different to the one they'd had just hours earlier, although slightly less bloody. The effect of it was little different as well; it was the healing of a wound that had been carried between its two protagonists for many months.

TBC


	2. Chapter 1 part 2

**Chapter 1: Finishing Business.**

**Part 2.**

The kiss was a reminder of everything that happened on New Caprica; memories of that night floated through Lee's head unbidden. He remembered how he'd held her head in his hands as he kissed her; the feeling of her hair laced through his fingers. As with all the kisses they'd shared, the passion held within it was beyond anything either of them had felt with anyone else, but their first kiss on New Caprica had been their most passionate to date. Maybe that had been made possible as a result of the fact they wouldn't be interrupted, maybe it was the alcohol or because their small ragtag fleet had discovered a habitable planet they could settle on. Lee didn't know what it was but he'd always thought they'd never share that energy again. He was wrong. The months of enforced separation seemed to have only increased the intensity between them.

It was at times like this, he knew the love he felt for her was reciprocated in every way; this was when his confusion about what happened between the two of them that night really hit him. In moments of real weakness he had forced himself to relive it in his mind, recalling every detail of that all too short time. Trying to work out what it was he did wrong; what he did that made her run away; to run from him. He could still hear her as she shouted out to the night sky that she loved him; her words still rang in his ears if he concentrated hard enough.

The last thing he needed to think about now was that night. It would only ignite the anger within him; anger he would all too easily direct at her, like he had at the dance. She'd said all the right things; pushed all the right buttons; done everything she could to get a reaction from him. Really it hadn't been that difficult for her to achieve as he'd been more than ready to accept the bait and it had worked a treat. By the time they'd stepped into the ring, he was truly ready to kill her. All he'd been able to think about were the bad things from that night; how she'd led him on and then left him high and dry the next morning. To marry Anders. Even now, just the thought of it felt like a punch to the gut, not dissimilar to those he'd actually received earlier.

He knew he needed to remember the good things about what happened between the two of them now. The way she'd felt in his arms. How her skin had felt soft beneath his fingertips reminding him again how feminine she really was. How he'd felt when they'd finally made love. The release he'd felt when he told her how he felt; how it had felt to admit to her that he wanted her. Even falling asleep with her in his arms was a memory he cherished. Every memory he tried to focus on reminded him why he wanted to be here; to be with her. He needed this. He needed to know she was okay, that they were okay.

****

She felt light headed when the kiss ended. The man could definitely kiss. Her lips still tingled and she already missed the feel of his lips on hers. She was officially pathetic. It was barely a few seconds and she missed it. They'd survived months apart and yet here she was, feeling like a giddy schoolgirl, which was so unlike her, and yet felt so right.

Kara relented and pulled him back towards her, unable to resist any longer, her arms instinctively winding around his neck, drawing him closer and allowing her lips to caress his again. She didn't stay there long though, moving along his jaw and down his neck. Each kiss she gave sent emotions coursing through her body. Hopefully he was feeling the same way. She'd felt these same emotions on the last night they'd shared. While they'd scared her immensely, too much on that night as it turned out, she wasn't anywhere near as panicky this time round. In fact they seemed to be having the opposite effect on her. Whereas earlier, both before and during the fight, she'd been edgy; since Lee'd said those few simple words, she was now only excited by the prospect of what was about to happen between the two of them.

She was fairly sure Lee didn't know what she'd gone through on New Caprica. If she was being honest she didn't want him to know to what depths she'd had to go too just to survive. Since returning to Galactica she'd tried to forget what the Cylons had done to her, but during the few times she'd been with Sam, she was unable to eradicate those memories. Those were the times when the memories of Leoben constantly haunted her. She hoped that wouldn't happen now. She didn't want anything to spoil this moment. The memories of her night with Lee had got her through her worst times in captivity and now they were about to create some more.

She continued to kiss him as she removed his jacket, running her hands down his muscular arms as it fell gently to the floor. Her hands slipped into his again and she squeezed them hard, pulling away from him to look him in the eyes once more. There was a grin on his face and his eyes had an attractive sparkle to them. "Are you laughing at me?" A pout formed on her face.

"Would I do that?" He paused, waiting for her to answer. She shrugged. "So we're finally here." Another pause. The corners of his mouth raised into a smirk as he looked at her.

"Do you want me to hit you again?" She couldn't get past the look on his face. Annoyance was beginning to flow through her veins with increasing speed and she was unable to stop the way she reacted to him now.

"No. I don't think that's what I want at all."

The cocky smirk was still there and it was starting to piss her off. "Frak off, Lee." At her words the smirk fell from his face and he backed away from her. He bent down, picking up his discarded jacket, slowly making his way towards the hatch. Her heart raced as she realized she was losing him all over again. The pain was too much to bear.

His heart was pounding; he didn't want to leave the room – but felt he had to. This would never work. They shouldn't be doing this. They'd hurt too many people – starting with each other. But still he really didn't want to leave; he couldn't be the one to run away. He paused as he reached the hatch. Shrugging his jacket back on, his hand fell on the bar he'd not so long put in place. "Do you think it'll always be like this?" he asked. She shrugged her shoulders, almost in defeat; mostly afraid what he asked was true. With his back to her he didn't notice, but he hadn't really expected an answer from her anyway. They stood in silence, both contemplating the last few minutes, trying to work out what the hell was going on between the two of them. 'I truly am a glutton for punishment' he thought, as he turned to see her one last time before he forcibly removed himself from the room. He looked at her over his shoulder, not sure what he was expecting to see but startled by what he did. Tears streamed down her face as she stood watching him. The two of them certainly didn't need the Cylons to cause them pain; they were more than capable of doing that to each other without any interference from them.

The look on her face settled it; there was no way he was leaving. He turned back to face the door, taking a deep breath, trying to calm his already frazzled nerves. Any peace he managed to instill within him in those few silent moments shattered when a hand tentatively touched his waist. Sparks ignited in both of them at the single touch. It would be hard to distinguish who made the next move. What they both became aware of was the kiss as they met once more in a dance they'd been participating in for far too long.

TBC

**A/N:** So there's part 2 of Chapter 1. I hope you liked it. Please review and let me know what you think. I won't make you wait too long for the next part... honest (although reviews may make me even quicker!)


	3. Chapter 1 part 3

A/N: Thanks for all the reviews after the last chapter. Here's the next chapter and as promised they finally get down to business. Enjoy!

Please review!

**Chapter 1: Finishing Business.**

**Part 3.**

The door was pressed against his back and Kara was pressed against his front. Lee couldn't help thinking that at this moment, he was the luckiest man alive, but quelled down the thought before he got carried away. Now was not the time. He didn't want a repeat of what had just nearly happened.

She could feel every part of him as she held her body against his; every toned muscle hidden by the jacket he was wearing once more. It felt good; it felt right. This was what she needed; what she wanted. She broke the kiss but didn't pull away from him. She needed to let him know she wasn't going to run away this time; she couldn't quite form the words as she knew it would come out wrong, but hoped her actions could convey the same message. She stared intently into his eyes seeing similar emotions bubbling within them. Her hand rose to his cheek, mirroring his earlier actions and touched the graze she'd left there, noticing the slight flinch as her fingers made contact. She placed her lips tenderly on the same spot, careful to ensure she caused him no further pain. His mouth found her neck, nuzzling into it, caressing each new spot it came into contact with.

They continued the tender exploration of each other for several minutes, still remaining pinned to the wall. Lee's hands made their way beneath the double layer of tanks Kara was wearing, unable to resist the urge to feel the skin hidden below them. As his fingers lightly touched her, a shiver ran through her body. Both of them savored the pleasure each was creating within the other. With the removal of each barrier between them, a new part was revealed waiting to be kissed and caressed. After all clothing had been shed; Lee reversed their positions, now pressing Kara's body into the wall of the room.

In reality Kara remembered very little about the night they'd shared. Both of them had had a lot to drink that night so details were sketchy to say the least. She did remember waking up the next morning and the overwhelming guilt that lodged itself in her chest as she lay in his arms. There were flashes from the night that came back to her throughout the day but there had been gaps; some huge gaps that had longed to be filled. Now when she thought about that night she couldn't work out what had really happened and what was her imagination filling in the blanks. During the months in captivity thoughts about that night with Lee was her only source of comfort and escape. She'd needed to think about Lee; anything to try to forget what she was going through.

But now she was sober; they both were. She could feel every part of him pressed against her and it felt so right. Everything about this was wrong but she didn't care. She was getting a do over and she was going to grab it while she could. She felt him hard, pressed against her and she smiled against his lips. Lifting her leg to wrap it around him, she felt a chuckle rumble through his chest. They broke apart and shared a smile.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Kara?"

She held his eyes and brought her hand to his face, once more gently caressing the mark she'd left on his cheek. "Yes." She paused, taking a deep breath, knowing the importance of what she was about to say, "This is what I want, Lee. I want you. I always have and I always will."

He smiled and then lifted her in his arms. Spinning them both round he moved them across the room. He gently lowered them both onto the bunk on the far side of the room. Their lips met again in a tender kiss that increased in intensity as time passed. His hand moved slowly from her hair, down her body grazing her breast as it made its way to stop on her hip. His mouth moved from hers and descended down; pausing momentarily at the base of her neck.

His actions were taking her breath away and causing tiny shivers to run through her body. She wanted to share the way she was feeling with him, to do to him what he was doing to her; but she was simply unable to move. She was so caught up with what he was doing that even thinking about trying to do anything was beyond her.

His hand at her hip pulled her closer to him and she shivered as she felt him pressed against her. This was it. They were really doing this. There would be no take backs and she didn't want there to be. She opened her eyes and saw him tenderly kissing her as he slowly made his way down her body. He never ceased to amaze her. She knew he was a good lover; she remembered that much from the night they'd shared, but this was something else. He needed her as much as she did him; the way he was being with her was more than evidence of that.

"Lee…" she said quietly.

He looked up at her words, a small look of concern appearing on his face. "Kara?" His question was hesitant. He was worried about what she was about to say. Had she changed her mind?

She smiled at him and he visibly relaxed. Her hand touched his shoulder and he made his way back up her body. Once he was back at eye level with her, she was able to see his face and she kissed it softly again. "Make love to me, Lee." He blinked at her words, "Show me how much you want this." His mouth lifted into a smile that matched hers and once again they kissed. Their tongues entwined as they explored each others mouths; again the passion between the two of them increasing. She sighed contentedly as he entered her and he stifled a groan at the same time. He set a slow and gentle pace, wanting this to last as long as it could, wanting to ensure she enjoyed what they were doing; that she knew just how he felt. Maybe if she did there would be another time; they'd be able to do this again.

Kara continued to kiss him, running her fingers through his hair before running them down his back. The pressure within her began to build and she scratched her nails down his back as she nearly reached her peak. As her nails impacted his skin, Lee slowed the pace he'd set, drawing his movements out. He knew he was as close as she was, but he fought to retain control. A small moan escaped from her as they broke their kiss and they stared into each others eyes. As she looked at him her vision became blurry and she was almost ashamed of the tears that were forming. Until she realized the same emotion was evident on his face.

This was the closest Lee had ever felt to Kara in the whole time they'd known each other. On New Caprica they'd managed to reach a new level of connection between them but now; this very moment in time was beyond even that. It had been said by many that when you saw the two of them flying together it was as if they flew as one person; they instinctively knew what the other was going to do and reacted perfectly to that action. Now felt pretty much the same, there was a closeness they were experiencing they'd never achieved before. It made it all the more real for Lee.

Kara continued to stare at the man before her; her best friend, the Apollo to her Starbuck; possibly the person who was closest to her. He was definitely the person who knew her best. Time seemed to stop as the moment struck. For the first time in more weeks than she cared to remember, she felt a semblance of normality. Lee's arms held her tighter as he reached the same moment of elation.

She looked at him as the euphoria began to ebb away; staring at him intently. She saw his face and noticed how relaxed he looked. She could only hope it would look like that again in the future, because she liked it. He slipped from her body and she almost sighed in disappointment at the loss of connection with him. She tightened her arms around him, hoping he'd understand she wanted to stay as they were for a little longer. Before they'd both have to go back to the reality of their day to day lives.

He seemed to understand because as he rolled over onto his back, he pulled her with him so she was partly draped over his body. Her head was resting on his shoulder and she could hear and feel his heartbeat as she lay there. She ran her hand up his arm, coming to rest on the now healed bullet wound near his other shoulder. A flash of memory of Lee falling to the ground after she shot him caused her to wince as she ran her fingertips over it.

"Don't, Kara." He wrapped his arm around her even tighter. "It wasn't your fault. I know that now. I did back then as well, I just needed to blame someone and you seemed as good a target as any."

"I… Gods, I'm sorry, Lee."

"I said it wasn't your fault."

"I'm still sorry. For everything. I never wanted to hurt you and yet it seems to be all I ever do. I shot you. I married Sam. I even slept with Baltar. Anything rather than face up to the way I felt… feel about you."

"Hey… you weren't the only one at fault through all this. You slept with Baltar because I wasn't man enough to make a move on you. I let him cut in on the two of us dancing and I never came back. I'm sure that if we hadn't had that row before you went back to Caprica, things between you and Sam may never have happened. If you hadn't slept with him then, things may be very different now; none of that changes the way I feel and felt about you." His hand moved down her back and settled on the curve of her rear. "I just want to be with you now. I'm happy for that to be under any circumstance you want. Just being with you is important enough for me to accept it whatever way you want."

She looked at him as he spoke and could see the truth radiating from his eyes. He wasn't lying; he really would accept whatever she was willing to offer. Did she want him to do that? Could she accept that from him? She wasn't sure she was prepared to give that and get just this back. Could she want more than that? She just didn't know.


	4. Chapter 1 part 4

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last part. Here's the next (and last) part of this chapter. Next chapter will related to The Passage - which had no Kara/Lee in so I just had to make it all up... but anyway that'll be next time.

Please review.

**Chapter 1: Finishing Business.**

**Part 4.**

Kara was still staring at him. He was returning her stare. She moved her head so she could kiss him once more, instantly feeling better as her tongue swept around his mouth. Lee was as ardent as she was with the kiss and pulled her so she was now straddling him. She could feel his length lying between their two bodies and she moved her hand to touch him, moving her fingers to circle his shaft. He pulled away from her kiss briefly and looked at her as she stroked him firmly.

She placed one hand above his shoulder and raised her body so she was looking down at his face. He was hardening in her hand and she felt a wave of triumph sweep through her as she saw the look on his face. Now was her time to show him just how she felt. She smirked at him, seeing his eyes roll back into his head as she moved her hand up and down. He gasped as she tightened her grip on him and she took advantage of his open mouth by kissing him deeply, again swiping her tongue around his mouth. She bit his lower lip softly as she repeatedly kissed him. His hand came up to her face and molded itself to the curve of her cheek. It was her turn to gasp when she felt his other hand move between her legs. His fingers touched her and she had to shut her eyes at the desire that swept through her body.

Both their hands continued exploring the other, driving each other closer to the edge. Kara stopped moving her hand as Lee hit the sensitive spot that only he ever found. She pushed herself down on the fingers embedded deep within her and groaned as he curved them up, pressing on that one spot harder. "Gods Lee, that feels good." She gasped as he once more hit the spot she was so desperate for him to reach. Her hand recommenced its movement on him, her thumb grazing the top swiftly. He began to throb within her hand as she continued her efforts. She was about to reach the peak and plummet headlong over the edge and she could tell he was just as close as she was. She needed to feel the intensity only they shared one last time before she left this room. She may never get another chance after this evening and she couldn't forego that opportunity.

She rose above him and pulled his hand from within her, moving both their hands towards his cock. She wrapped their fingers around him and moved them so it was covered with the moisture from her body. She took their hands off him and entwined their fingers. Staring at him intently, she lowered herself onto him, feeling herself expand to admit him in. Once she'd taken the length of him into her, she stopped moving, still staring into his eyes.

He held her gaze and his breath as he waited for her to move. He wanted to touch her but he knew it was important she be in control this time. Anyway part of him wanted her to control this. He liked Kara when she did. There was a fire to her that did something to him; it gave him the opportunity to relinquish control. Something he didn't get to do very often, especially these days.

Finally she began to move, slowly rising up and then lowering herself once more. He exhaled softly as she did so, trying to refrain from pushing himself up into her as she rose. She was still clutching his hand and her grip tightened each time she moved. He could tell she was trying to go slow and almost smiled as he saw the tension in her body building as the effort to do so, became more of a struggle.

She pulled on his arm and wrapped her free arm around his neck as he sat up. Their mouths met once more as she moved on him again and again. There was so much he wanted to say; do; show her and he knew he couldn't. He needed to let her be in charge; as much for himself as for her.

She kissed his neck, leaving a mark on his skin that would leave little doubt to his wife just what he'd been doing. And she would surely know just who it was he'd been doing it with. She sped up her movements a little as this knowledge spurred her on more. Her breaths were much quicker now, as were his. She couldn't kiss him now; the need for oxygen taking precedence over everything else. He was murmuring her name over and over against her neck as she continued to move on him. She was so close but also a little reluctant to reach the tantalizing goal that was so near. What if this was the last time this ever happened? She just wanted this to go on forever; for it to always be like this.

She wriggled her hips against him as she descended again and he gasped. She released her hold on his neck and lifted his chin from her shoulder with her hand. His eyes were wide as they once again stared at each other. Kara moved further forward trying to push him just a little deeper. Again she increased the speed some more and finally Lee moved with her. His hand that wasn't holding hers moved to her hip and he grasped it in his fingers; a grip that was sure to leave a bruise.

It wasn't long before they were both so close. Lee squeezed her hand tenderly before moving both their hands to the point where their bodies met. Using both their fingers to touch her already sensitive clit was enough to push Kara to her climax. Her muscles clenched him within her as she felt wave after wave of pure bliss pulsate through her body. Lee smiled briefly as he observed her reaction; his fingers continued to touch her and he thrust into her body as her head fell backwards. The look on her face was the reason he wanted; no needed this to happen. He could feel the tell-tale tingle of the beginning of his orgasm starting to build within him but pushed the feeling away as he was determined to make this last as long as he could.

She couldn't move anymore. The things Lee was doing to her were beyond description. He was still moving within her and she knew she was more than likely going to peak again before this finished. She'd tried to stay in control this time but as usual he'd reduced her to something resembling a quivering mass of jelly that she'd loved so much as a child. There was no one else who could do this to her. She leant against him and his arm pulled her closer to him, instinctively knowing she needed him to hold her up.

Lee could feel her fading as she leant against him and he slowed his movements, allowing both of them time to recover slightly. His movements had almost stopped after a couple of minutes and by this time she was finally able to lift her head off his shoulder. She looked incredibly tired as she kissed him tenderly. He kissed her back, careful to not be too pushy with her. She moved her lips slowly from his mouth until she reached his ear. Once there she caressed it with her teeth and tongue, knowing it was a sensitive spot for Lee. She felt a shiver run down his back as she did just that and had to stifle the smirk that threatened. "Lee…" she paused as she inhaled deeply taking in the scent that was pure Lee. Her voice was breathy and she felt Lee's lips kiss her cheek. "It's your turn." She hoped he realized what she meant.

She only had to wait a couple of seconds before Lee reacted to what she said. First he released her hand and placed his on her other hip. Both of his hands now gripped her tightly and he began once more to move within her; which she was grateful for. He kissed her repeatedly, as if trying desperately to kiss every part of her he could reach. Slowly she began to move with him, feeling the pressure beginning to rise to a crescendo again.

Lee decided he needed to get the upper hand again and somehow managed to change their position so Kara was once more beneath him. He could see the sparkle in her eyes and knew he was on the right track. She wrapped both of her legs around him and used her heels to push him into her further. He took her face between his hands and balanced his weight on his arms so he wasn't crushing her.

"Let go, Lee." Her voice was still quiet, but he could see the desire in her eyes.

The pressure within him to do that had been building ever since she'd reached her peak and at her blessing, he felt he was able to do as he asked. He kissed her deeply again, loving the taste of her that always seemed to entice him in. She really was like no one else he knew. His pace had increased since she'd spoken and every inwards stroke pushed him deeper into her. The intensity between the two of them increased further and both felt closer to each other than they thought they could ever be.

Kara was growing in excitement with each movement from Lee. She could feel her heart beating extremely fast and it was echoed by the feel of Lee's beating against her chest. Her breaths were short and she could have sworn she saw stars as they finally reached a frenetic pace. They moved as one and then Lee gave one last push and fell over the edge. Kara felt him pulse within her and that was enough to set her off again.

They lay in silence for several minutes as the feelings slowly faded. "Wow." He said, lifting his head to see her face.

"I was thinking the same thing." She kissed him briefly and smiled at him.

"I don't want to go."

He looked sad and Kara wished she could wipe that look from his face. "She'll be wondering where you are."

He laughed loudly. "One look at me, Kara and she's going to know exactly where I've been and what I've been doing."

"You do have a sort of glow about you." Now there was a definite smirk on her face.

"Yeah, well I've been frakked to within an inch of my life. And not by my wife…"

She could see the shame bubbling under the surface and felt her own guilt increase. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm not. I've wanted to do that for a long time and I'm not going to regret what just happened between us, Kara. I can't. I won't lose you again." The kiss he gave her was so soft and gentle and it brought tears to her eyes again.

He started to pull away from her and she just wasn't prepared for him to go. "Don't leave me. Just a little while longer… please."

He acquiesced and maintained his position surrounding her. He knew he should leave the room but at the same time, couldn't break the closeness with her. She clutched onto him tightly once he stopped moving away from her. The tiredness she'd been feeling for a while finally caught up with her and it wasn't long before she fell asleep. Lee knew the instant that happened as her hold on him lessened. He watched her for a couple more minutes before disentangling himself from her hold. He watched her as he put his clothes back on. Part of him really didn't want to leave her and he very nearly didn't when he heard her whisper his name in her sleep. She rolled over to face him as she slept and he stood looking at her, midway through redressing. A couple of steps took him back to the bunk and he bent over, kissing her softly on her forehead. She smiled as he pulled away from her and he did the same before covering her with a blanket at the foot of the bunk. Then he turned to leave the room and made his way towards the hatch. As quiet as he could he removed the bar and opened it. He walked out and down the corridor towards his quarters; back towards his wife and away from the woman he loved.

TBC


	5. Chapter 2 part 1

A/N: So here's the first past of Chapter 2. This chapter relates to the episode "The Passage." As I mentioned in the last chapter, this episode had no Kara/Lee scenes in it - so I pretty much had to make up where I thought it should go. I hope you like what I've done.

Please review

**Chapter 2: Choices.**

**Part 1.**

Lee walked along the corridor at a brisk pace. He knew he should be going back to his quarters to see his wife, who he hadn't seen in over a day, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. They'd been flying through the star cluster surrounding the algae planet for three trips now and had been fortunate to have lost only one ship from the fleet. To have lost a ship was a tragedy but it could have been much worse and it was only going to get harder as time went on. He was tired but the stim's he'd taken were refusing to let him get any rest which was a shame as he really should be sleeping now. It was only a few hours before he'd be back in the Raptor to make another long and stressful trip through to the planet and back.

So now he was walking in the bowels of the Battlestar to meet the one person who would understand best how he was feeling. This would be the first time they'd been able to meet and spend any real time together in over a week. It was just a few short weeks since the dance and the aftermath of it and until this week they'd been able to see each other on a fairly regular basis. Not necessarily to do anything other than spend time with each other. Sometimes they shared the closeness and passion of making love but a lot of the times they were just happy to spend time with each other. All in all, Lee was happy with the way things were progressing between them and he only hoped it would continue. He was almost at their usual meeting place and there was a small bud of excitement welling in his gut. He'd missed her so much. It wasn't like he hadn't seen her but things were different when it was just the two of them. This wasn't the first time they'd tried to get together, in fact they'd tried after the both of the first two trips back from the algae planet but both times one of them had been unable to make it. After the first trip it had been Kara who hadn't shown up; she'd had to cover a shift on CAP at the last minute. He'd sat there for over an hour before admitting to himself she wasn't turning up and leaving the room disappointed. He couldn't bring himself to go back to his quarters; knowing Dee would be there so he'd gone to the briefing room and dozed in a chair on the front row. The second time it was Lee who'd been called to a meeting with the President and his father for an update on his pilots' conditions. This time it was Kara who'd sat there for much longer than she'd care to admit before finally leaving the room and going back to her bunk. Lee eventually turned up to the room, only about fifteen minutes after she'd gone and again struggled with his own disappointment that she wasn't there. He knew it was a long shot she'd still be there when he was so late but a small part of him had hoped she'd waited. He just hoped she'd be there this time.

He rounded the corridor and got to the room they were supposed to meet in. He checked both ways to make sure there wasn't anyone around and then opened the hatch and walked through it. His heart fell as he saw the room was empty; empty of people anyway. She wasn't there. Hopefully she'd turn up. Disappointment started its journey around his weary body and suddenly he was more tired than he'd realized before. Maybe she'd turn up in a few minutes. While he waited he sat on one of the many crates that now crowded the room in the effort to free up space for the many people currently swelling Galactica's occupancy and he leaned against the wall behind him and closed his eyes for just a short moment.

****

Kara opened the hatch and peered around the door; hoping to see him there but trying to keep the hope from building too much. She saw Lee and a small smile appeared on her face. She looked at him as she entered the room, quietly closing the door and locking it. She realized it was a good thing she was being quiet as it appeared Lee was asleep. She noticed the bags under his eyes and the ever-present tension in the way he sat, even as he slept. She walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, needing to check he was really there. Her touch was enough to wake him with a start. "Sorry Lee. I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay. The last thing I need is to fall asleep here. It's not exactly comfortable."

She looked around the room and couldn't help but agree with him that any hope of finding somewhere to rest in this room was now just a pipedream. She turned back to face him. "I've missed you the last few days. I wanted to see you so much." She looked down, almost ashamed to meet his eyes.

"Hey." He stood from the crate and moved a step closer to her, caressing her face with his hand. "I wish we'd been able to meet earlier than now as well but it's not been possible." He kissed her briefly, just a short kiss but it felt good to have some physical contact with her. "It's just the way things are at the moment."

She raised her eyes to look at him and smiled. "How long have you got before you need to go?"

He glanced at his watch quickly, "Just over an hour before I need to go to the briefing room and get ready."

"That should be enough time." She smirked at him.

"For what?" He said a smirk also on his face.

"This," was the quick response, right before she kissed him again. "And this." She moved her hands up his front and began to undo the buttons of his jacket, quickly removing it from his shoulders. His tanks followed suit just as quickly. Both of them toed the boots from their feet.

His hands weren't idle either; he'd removed her hooded top to reveal just her bra below. He bent down and kissed her softly on the neck, slowly descending down her chest. He knelt before her as he moved lower. His hands held her hips and she squirmed slightly as the slight stubble on his face rubbed against her stomach. He smiled against her stomach as he felt her move, which only caused her to move again. His mouth worshipped her stomach as he bathed it with kisses. He felt her fingers run through his hair as her hand pulled him closer to her body. It was only a couple of minutes before he felt her pulling him back up her body. He went with reluctance but knew they didn't have long enough for him to do everything he wanted to.

Once he got to his feet he was quick to kiss her, drawing her tongue into his mouth. She pushed against his shoulder and turned them around. The next thing he knew, she was backing up, pulling him with her. Her hands were loosening her joggers and they fell to her ankles along with her underwear and then off her feet as she moved to sit on the crate he'd not so long been asleep on. She was naked before him and he paused briefly to look at her. Each time, it was as if it was the first time he'd seen her and she took his breath away.

She pulled him towards her once more, biting her lip as she began to undo his pants. He watched her as her fingers nimbly undid the belt and lowered the zipper. She moved the pants down his legs, taking his boxers with them. Her fingers grazed back up his legs and he quickly stepped out of the pants that were now pooled around his ankles. She caught his attention as she took him in her hand, gently pulling him the last step to her. Kara smiled at him and he bent slightly to kiss her on the mouth.

The passion swelled between them as the kiss became deeper. She clutched onto his shoulders as he pushed into her. They broke their kiss and stared at each other. Both of them smiled as the emotions they'd been unable to feel for several days fought for dominance over their tired bodies. They began to move at the same time, knowing hard and fast was the only thing they had time for before both of them needed to be somewhere else.

The intensity they both felt was there, as usual, but there was also a comfort both of them couldn't deny. A comfort they got from nobody else; one they could only share with each other.

Kara was breathing hard as Lee moved in and out of her. The feel of him pushing in her was enough to remove the painful reminder of the crate she was sitting on. She could see sweat coating Lee's skin and ran her tongue over his neck, tasting the salty moisture of him. She continued to work her mouth up his neck and towards his ear. The edge was approaching fast and she wanted to draw it out as long as possible, even though they didn't really have time to do that.

"Gods, Kara. I've needed this so much. I don't think I realized till now just how much." He was struggling for oxygen just as much as she was.

She smiled as the impact of him words hit her. She whispered in his ear, "I needed this too, Lee. I need you so much." She felt his reaction to her words, as he sped up his movements slightly. She felt his arms tighten around her and felt safer for it. Her vision started to go blurry as the climax approached fast. "I love you, Lee. More than I thought I could ever love anyone." Mere seconds later, she fell into the abyss and he was close behind her.

There was almost silence as they both recovered. All that could be heard in the room was the sounds of their breaths as they both gasped for air. Arms were still possessively around each other and showed no sign of moving from their current location.

Finally Lee spoke, in little more than a whisper. "I love you too, Kara."

She smiled against his shoulder and then kissed a spot she could reach without having to move. "We should be leaving here. We're both needed somewhere else."

Reluctantly Lee pulled away from her. He knew she was right. He picked up his uniform from where it lay on the floor and began to pull it back on. He turned to face Kara and she was also getting dressed. His heart swelled as he saw her before him. What he'd said earlier was correct. He did love her, more than anything he'd ever loved in his life; way more than he loved his wife and for that he felt an exorbitant amount of guilt. A guilt that was increasing each time they met each other.

His relationship with Dee was at an impasse. He knew she suspected something was going on between him and Kara and he did nothing to deny it. In fact, it was just something they didn't discuss, which was a good thing as far as Lee was concerned. Procrastination was the current watch-word. If he was being honest with himself, he was fairly sure most of the crew thought the two of them were having an affair; but these were the same people who had thought Lee and Kara were together before the Twelve Colonies fell.

In reality, Apollo and Starbuck had been the topic of much speculation since… forever. What was going around the ship now was nothing new - but for the first time ever it was correct. The guilt he was feeling had little to do with what he was doing to his wife; had barely anything to do with the disdain he knew his father would probably throw his way; but had everything to do with the way he was treating Kara. He felt ashamed of his behavior. He knew it wasn't just his decision but he felt he should be able to restrain himself. He couldn't though; it was just beyond him and he knew it.

By the time they were both fully dressed there were only a couple of minutes before they both needed to leave. Lee suddenly remembered something he'd found which he'd brought with him. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the energy bar and walked towards her once more. "I found this earlier." He said as he opened it. Breaking it in half, he placed one bit in her hand and then began to eat the bit he still had. "Eat."

She tried to put it back in his hand, "It's yours. I can't take this from you, Lee."

"Why not? It's mine to give and I want you to have some of it as well. You need food just as much as I do, Kara. Now eat."

She stared at him for a few seconds before starting to nibble on the edge of the bar. "Thanks Lee."

When they'd finished eating, there really was no time left. Lee walked towards the door and waited for Kara to follow him. As she walked over, he unlocked the door and opened the hatch. She made her way past him and out to the corridor. Just as she was about to leave, Lee reached for her arm, taking her hand in his. He pulled on it slightly so she took a couple of steps back into the room. "Go careful out there, Kara, please."

She looked into his eyes and could see the worry present there. "I will, Lee. I will." He kissed her on the lips as she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him tight against her. As the kiss broke, she spoke to him one more time. "You be careful too, okay? I need you to come back, Lee." Her lips found his again and then she quickly turned and walked away from him back to the pilots' quarters.

TBC


	6. Chapter 2 part 2

A/N: Here is the last part of Chapter 2. Enjoy... and please review.

**Chapter 2: Choices.**

**Part 2.**

The fourth jump was complete and unfortunately Kat lost the ship that was trailing her. It was definitely getting more difficult for all of them. An impact making it harder still was the fact people were beginning to succumb to the effects of too much radiation. Two pilots had been forced to stop after the third trip and Lee wouldn't be surprised if when he went to prepare for the next (and last) trip he'd be down a couple more. A problem when one dropped out was that meant another less experienced pilot had to step in which only amplified the risks. The pressure was beginning to weigh heavy on Lee's shoulders. He needed a break… and a shower.

He stopped at the bunk he'd been using over the last couple of days and retrieved a towel. He noticed most of the bunks were occupied; the curtains drawn as the inhabitants tried to sleep. He was sure to make as little noise as possible knowing everyone needed as much rest as they could get. He'd be in their position too shortly; or at least he hoped so anyway. He walked to the head and opened the hatch, hoping more than anything there wouldn't by anyone there. As soon as he walked in the room he could hear the telltale sound of water running which meant he wasn't going to be lucky. He lowered his head in a vain attempt to remain unnoticed by the other occupant of the room. He just wanted take his shower and go to bed; the last thing he needed was to get waylaid by anyone. Two steps more and he couldn't help but realize who the person currently taking their shower was. Kara. Suddenly his day seemed brighter; seeing Kara always made him feel better. The last time he'd seen her was just before the last trip. He hadn't seen her when they returned; she'd disappeared almost as soon as they'd landed. He'd been worried at first but that fear was allayed as soon as he discovered she'd made it back to Galactica.

She hadn't seen him yet and he took some time to watch her as she stood under the flow of water. She was stunning. Each time he saw her he just realized it again; it wasn't that he didn't know it – he was just reminded of the fact. He put his towel beside hers on the bench in the middle of the room along with the clothes he quickly removed before walking over to the cubicle she was in. "Hello beautiful." He spoke quietly, not wanting to startle her too much.

She spun round to face him, shock written over her face. As soon as she saw it was him, she visibly relaxed. A smirk appeared on her face as she noticed the fact he was naked in front of her. "Hello yourself." She grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to her. He shivered slightly as the water hit his body, causing her to smile even more.

She kissed him and the water didn't seem so cold anymore. They stood under the icy flow as they continued to kiss. Lee now wasn't feeling as tired as he'd been when he first entered the room and his body was reacting to his nearness to Kara in the same way it always did. He broke the kiss, gasping for breath as her hand touched him gently. "I'm so glad you're okay. I was worried earlier, I couldn't find you after I landed and I thought for a minute or two that you hadn't made it back." His heart faltered as he even spoke the words, unable to comprehend just how he'd cope if that circumstance ever arose.

The guilt at causing him worry hit her quickly. "Sorry." She kissed him on the shoulder, placing her head on the same spot just seconds later.

She was avoiding looking at him and he knew something was troubling her. "Are you okay?"

"Course I am. Why would anything be wrong?"

She'd immediately sounded a defensive and Lee was instantly aware she was hiding something from him. He began to worry that whatever it was could mean they'd stop seeing each other and he wasn't sure he could give in to that prospect so easily. "Talk to me, Kara. Please." He was almost begging her; but he needed to know what was wrong with her. Despite their closeness, he could almost feel her pushing him away.

She looked at him tentatively; realizing he was concerned about her and yet not sure what to say without revealing everything. "What would you do if you found out something about someone and knew you needed to tell people about it but this person begged you not to?"

He thought about what she'd asked, worry this hypothetical person was her floating through his mind. What was she so reluctant to tell him? He tried to find out just who it was she was talking about. "Is it someone I know?"

"Yes. I'm not going to tell you who, Lee, so don't even ask." She knew he would keep trying to find out who it was unless she stopped him now.

"You wanted my opinion, didn't you Kara?"

She sighed softly; reluctantly admitting he was right. "It's someone we both know well. They lied about who they were when they first came to Galactica after the war began. If people knew the truth, there'd be trouble. My heart tells me I should tell your dad, but my head says we need all the people we can get at the moment. I mean, a lot of people did things before this that they're ashamed of. Everyone deserves a second chance, right?"

He studied her as she spoke; almost smiling as he watched her argue with herself. "I'm sure there are many things people would do differently if they had the opportunity; you, me, my dad. Everyone's got something they're not proud of in their past. It's what we do now that matters." He kissed her softly on the lips, quashing any further discussion she may want to have with him.

She let him kiss her getting swept away with the intensity of it; trying to will herself to forget everything bubbling around in her head. Despite the heat they were generating it was beginning to get cold now. She reached around him and turned off the water; it wasn't like there was any warm water for them to take advantage of anyway. He'd lifted her in his arms and she moved her legs around his body, drawing him closer to her, relishing the feeling of being near him, the warmth of his body next to hers. She sighed as she felt him wrapped in her, feeling a sense of calm wash over her for the first time since she'd landed her Viper.

He continued to kiss her as he pressed her body against the cold metal of the wall behind her. She gasped at the feel of it against her back and he took advantage of her open mouth, to explore it with his tongue. She moved her hips as he pushed his body against her; loving the feel of his body as it brushed against hers. She pulled away from his mouth, "Gods, Lee. I love you. I love this."

Her words reassured him greatly. "I love you too."

"Stay with me tonight, Lee." She whispered against his mouth.

His heart almost stopped at her words and it took him a few seconds before he could say anything in response. "People will know… Sam will find out."

She'd expected him to say this but she still thought for a while before saying what she wanted to say. "Sam's not here. I don't want Sam here. I want you with me, tonight. I need you to just be with me, Lee."

He melted at her words, all previous reasons for saying no disappearing in an instant. He kissed her softly on the lips. "I'll stay with you." He pulled her away from the wall, holding her close to him as he walked them out of the cubicle. She slowly lowered her feet to the floor, still leaning against him; her head on his shoulder. He moved from her and picked up both towels, quickly pulling his own around his waist. He then wrapped the other around her shoulders, rubbing his hands gently up and down her arms to dry them. He continued to wipe the towel over her body while she stood there barely aware of her surroundings. Lee could tell she was exhausted and could feel himself heading in the same direction. When she was finally dry he helped her dress in the clothes she'd brought with her. He threw on his own and then moved the two of them back into the pilot's quarters.

The room was still mostly quiet, apart from the odd snore emanating from within a couple of the bunks. Lee walked the two of them over to her bunk, pulling back the curtain that hid it from the rest of the room. She clambered into the bunk, pulling herself into a ball as she moved across the space. He stood looking at her as she lay, barely responsive to anything around her. Despite what he'd promised her, he was now wondering if what she'd asked was such a good idea. In reality he wanted nothing more than to crawl in beside her and draw her into his arms. His concern about her was growing as time passed. Something was obviously bothering her and he wanted to be there for her; to help her deal with it. However he knew there would be consequences to the action he was contemplating, consequences he wasn't sure either of them was willing to face.

"Lee…" Her voice was a whisper as she spoke and yet it was hit Lee with such force she might as well have yelled it. Her tone shouted despair despite what it lacked in volume and Lee moved to enter the bunk and lie beside her. He started to reach for her, but she beat him to it by launching herself into his arms. He pulled her closer to him so she was almost lying on top of him; her leg resting on top of his, her head on his chest. His hand on her back gently stroked the skin beneath her tanks and he felt her sigh as his hand swept across the skin. This was a side to Kara he didn't get to see very often. Everyone was very used to the bold, brash exterior she normally exuded. This was the Kara she very rarely let anyone see and Lee felt privileged to be one of the few who witnessed it. He loved it when she was her usual self as well but there was something about seeing her as vulnerable as she was now that gave him an extra thrill. It also brought out the protective side to him; putting it front and center. Most people knew he cared a great deal about all his pilots but as much as he did he also had to be a stern taskmaster to them at times as well. It was usually a thankless task and one that Lee felt a little awkward doing; even after all these years. He liked the fact she'd turned to him; not his dad, not Helo and not even Sam. She'd turned to him and he knew that meant a lot more to him than he should really allow it to. Even given the way things were between them; both now and in the past couple of weeks, he was realistic enough to know he couldn't push her and he certainly wasn't going to. He'd made that mistake before back on New Caprica and he'd lived to regret it. That wasn't going to happen; he wouldn't let it.

They lay in silence for a while, taking comfort from each other's presence, their space lit by only the solitary bulb still shining in the main area of the room. Kara was almost asleep; she could feel the pull on her consciousness as she lay in Lee's arms. She struggled to stay awake a little bit longer; she needed to feel comforted and that to her always meant being with Lee. There wasn't anyone else who could make her feel the way he did. She knew that but it had taken her a long time to admit it to herself. Now she just had to learn how to admit it to anyone else; especially Lee.

Her thoughts turned to the scenes she'd seen just a few hours earlier. As soon as she landed she'd been witness to an influx of people from one of the remaining ships boarding Galactica. She'd seen the heated exchange between Kat and one of the new passengers. She'd spoken to the guy after the feisty pilot had left, wanting to know how he knew Kat – or Sasha as he kept calling her. Their chat did little to enlighten her so she'd gone to see Kat instead. She finally managed to corner her in the bowels of the ship and she'd admitted to her somewhat shady past. Kara's arms tightened around Lee as she remembered seeing the desperation in Kat's eyes as she'd begged her not to tell the Admiral. She'd recognized that desperation; she seen it before, in her own eyes, just after Zak's death.

As if hearing her thoughts, Lee pressed his lips to the top of her head, kissing her tenderly. Kara smiled slightly, feeling the love he felt for her in that small kiss. She shuffled herself up the bed so she was level with him, reaching across him to pull her curtain mostly shut. There was still a little light coming through the gap, but they were at least protected from the view of most of the rest of the room. She kissed him on the lips as she shifted her hips against his. She felt his sharp intake of breath as she pressed herself against him. She pushed his tanks up his body and the kiss broke so she could lift them over his head. She made swift work of her own tanks before resuming the kiss. His arms pulled her body back towards his; pushing her breasts against his chest. Her heart rate increased as his fingertips traced down her back until his hand met the curve of her bum, pulling her closer to him. She smiled against his mouth as their tongues met in another kiss.

His mouth left hers, although leaving no distance between them. "We should be getting some rest, we've got one last trip to make in about five hours time. And it's going to be the hardest one so far."

"I know but this feels so good." She needed the connection with him, to remind herself just how he felt about her. "Don't you think so?"

He kissed her again and then moved his mouth across her face, kissing her softly as he did so, winding one hand in her hair as his lips kissed across her face. "It does." He whispered in her ear before he ran his tongue along the curve of her ear. She felt the urgency increase within her as she felt his mouth move across her face. There was nothing she wanted more than to make love to him, but she knew he was right. They needed to rest. Both of them were far too tired to even be considering this.

Both seemed to know how the other felt as it never turned into anything more than kissing and touching each other and it wasn't long till the two of them eventually gave in to the tiredness they'd both been fighting since they'd landed back on Galactica. They slept, finally at peace, in each others arms. The couple of pilots in the room, who woke before either of them did just a few hours later saw the two of them but it was more than their lives were worth for them to mention to anyone about seeing the two of them lying together like that.

****

Drained was the only way to describe the way Lee was feeling. There was also a feeling of pride that eased the edge from the tiredness ebbing through his body. He moved down the corridor away from the briefing room, not really sure of where he was going, but needing to get away from everyone. He'd seen Kara's face as she'd looked at his father; he'd seen the immense sense of loss in his father's eyes as he'd returned her gaze. He knew immediately; a knowledge that intensified as Kat's name was moved to replace his at the top of the pilot chart; making her CAG one last time. He knew Kat was gone. It was her that Kara had been talking about just a few hours earlier and he couldn't help but wonder just what it was she'd discovered.

Whatever it was had been enough to make Kat break his rules and go out one last time. It was Lee that discovered the blackened radiation badge in her locker just half an hour after she'd finally returned, having against all odds brought her lost ship back with her. He'd gone there to get her some clean clothes for when she left Sickbay because at that time they hadn't realized just how bad she was. He felt a certain amount of blame; for not noticing she was ill before the last trip. If he hadn't been so wrapped up in thoughts about Kara, he would have seen it. He should have seen it.

Lee walked for quite some time; glad of the fact everyone seemed to be avoiding him just as much as he was them. He really should go back to his quarters; back to his wife; if he was any decent sort of husband that was where he would be. In truth though being there was the last place he wanted to be. He couldn't face the stares, the stony silence that filled the room every time they were together. He knew she suspected what was going on between him and Kara. He felt guilty but he couldn't bring himself to care. She knew how he'd felt about Kara before they'd got married. Gods, she'd even mentioned it when he'd asked her to marry him the morning after that night on New Caprica. She'd said she thought it would only be until Kara came back into his life. It was Lee who was determined to go through with it; he didn't want to admit, even to himself, that he'd settled for second best. The biggest problem was that now he couldn't live with that decision because now he had the chance to have his first choice. And he wanted to take it.

Just as he was thinking this, he looked up and spied the woman of his thoughts a few meters away in the memorial hallway. He could tell from the way she was standing that she was clearly upset by Kat's death. He walked up to her and stood at her side. Her right hand was touching the photo of Kat she'd obviously just pinned on the wall. As he stood closer to her he could clearly see tears on her cheeks and he reached for her left hand, taking it in his. They stood in silence for some minutes, Lee's grip tightening on her hand to give her some comfort.

Kara fought the tears now cascading down her face. She hated Lee seeing her like this; for anyone to see her like this. She hated feeling this way. She's Starbuck; she shouldn't show any weakness. That being said, having Lee here did make her feel better; safer somehow.

"You okay?"

His words startled her somewhat. She'd been trying to deal with the impact of the last few hours before he spoke. Now though; now he'd asked her how she felt, she felt far from okay. She couldn't bring herself to look at the photo anymore. The wealth of guilt she felt as she looked at Kat's face became too much for her again. She turned to face Lee, resting her head against his chest. The strain she'd been feeling finally got the better of her, and she gave in to the tears that had been threatening since she'd heard about Kat's death. His arms came around her body, pulling her closer to him. His hand stroked up and down her back and she could feel him kiss the top of her head. She closed her eyes, wanting to shut away the rest of the universe. It worked to a certain point. She was still aware of Lee and for that she was grateful. "It shouldn't be like this, Lee."

"I know…"

"It's my fault."

"Shh… Kara, it's not your fault. Not everything that happens is because of you." Again he kissed her softly on her hair.

"She did what she did because I had a go at her. I should have just let things carry on as they were."

He pulled her away from him, raising her head with his hand. "Kara, give me your eyes." He paused, waiting for her to do as he asked. "Stop this. The reason Kat did what she did, is because she wanted to make up for her past mistakes. There was no other reason for it. Stop blaming yourself."

"But Lee…"

He kissed her on the lips, effectively silencing her from carrying on. She gave in to the kiss, letting it wash over her. She managed to push the thoughts about Kat as far away as she could. She let Lee's tongue enter her mouth, feeling the normal buzz that began whenever they kissed. She knew it was a bad idea for the two of them to be doing this where they were but she currently didn't care. She just wanted what she was currently feeling with Lee to continue and damn the consequences. They'd deal with them when they occurred.

TBC

**A/N2**: I can't seem to stop writing shower scenes for Lee... oh well, if i must - so be it! :-)


	7. Chapter 3 part 1

**A/N:** So another new chapter and my muse really went for it in this chapter. This part is really just laying the groundwork for the rest of the chapter but I hope you enjoy it. Please review.

**Chapter 3: Trapped.**

**Part 1.**

Lee had been on the algae planet for just about seven days and he was pretty sure the Gods and just about everyone else had it in for him. Since he'd been on the planet he'd been unfortunate enough to discover the dust from the surface got everywhere. It was beyond annoying and had led to several equipment failures slowing down the algae collection. There was no way to avoid it. And the fact he'd been delayed on the surface as a result of it just gave him another reason to hate the stuff. Another thing he was struggling to avoid was his wife. It had been his father's brilliant idea to assign her to the planet so the two of them could be together. Even better for Lee, Sam was also on the surface; so another person to avoid as much as he could. The most importantly impacting on Lee's misery though was Kara wasn't on the planet; she was back on Galactica and he wasn't too proud to admit he was missing her; a lot. So Lee was fairly frakked off with everything and he wished they'd never found the frakking planet.

Besides missing Kara, the main problem he had was his wife. Dee had recently started to make barbed comments about Kara to Lee and he didn't say anything in return. It wasn't like there was anything he could say anyway. Everything she was insinuating was closer to the truth than he cared to admit. And every time she mentioned her; it was just another reminder that she wasn't around. He'd seen Dee talking to Anders a couple of times since being on the planet as well and he could only imagine just what it was they were talking about. Maybe he was being paranoid about it but he was fairly sure he wasn't imagining the glares he'd been receiving from Kara's husband over the few days.

It really didn't help that the last time he'd seen Kara before coming down to the planet hadn't gone quite as well as he'd wanted it to. It had been just before he'd come down to the surface; once he'd realized just who was making the trip with him; and who wasn't. Kara was still subdued. She had been ever since Kat had died, which seemed the opposite to how it should be as they'd barely tolerated each other when she'd been alive. Not that he expected to singing and dancing about it; but still. Kat's death had affected Kara a lot though and she was distracted; even when she was with him. He'd tried to connect with her; to make her realize he was there for her, but it had all been in vain. She just didn't seem to be able to get out of her funk.

They'd had sex but it paled in comparison to their previous liaisons and Lee certainly hadn't felt any better for it. It became fairly obvious Kara hadn't either as she'd left minutes after they'd finished with barely a second glance back at him before she walked out of the room; she hadn't even said goodbye to him as she left and it was this that really bothered Lee more than the bad sex. He could have been just about anyone with her in that room; for the first time ever, she'd used him for a frak. It had meant nothing to her; or she at least gave the impression that was the case anyway. For some time after she walked out Lee had lay on the bunk for thinking about the situation before finally putting his uniform back on and making his way to the flight deck so he got to descend to his current living hell.

So now he spent most days with the growing hope Kara would come down to the surface on a shuttle run with supplies for the crew down here. Of course he'd been hoping this ever since he'd left Galactica and she was yet to show up. He wasn't sure if that would make him feel any better though if she did come down to the surface. What could they do? Her husband was here and no doubt would want her to perform her wifely duties and frak him senseless. Lee shook his head; that was the last thing he needed to be thinking about. Anyway he had Dee to contend with. There was little frakking going on in his marriage at this point though and he couldn't say he was that bothered by it. Ironically, it was his lack of concern about the state of his marriage that bothered him more. Even he could see he was a bastard for just feeling the way he did. And given the state of his relationship with Kara as well, Lee was feeling pretty miserable. Actually morose would be a better description of the way he was feeling. He was definitely finding it difficult to find anything to be happy about. Another side affect of his lengthy time on the planet was his increasing guilt. There was very little for him to do once he'd finished his shift other than think about everything. Lee, the over thinker, was at the fore front during this time. His only other options for passing the time were being with Dee which was definitely not how he would choose to spend his free time or to think about his faltering relationship with Kara which made him almost as miserable. So Lee was spending a lot of time on his own; working up an increasing wealth of guilt.

****

Kara was lying on her bunk wondering just what she'd done so wrong in her life to deserve this misery. Not for the first time in her life, she wanted to run; she just wasn't sure what it was she wanted to run from. She knew she was fighting some sort of depression; she had been ever since Kat had died. She was struggling to come to terms with why her death in particular had affected her so badly. They hadn't been the best of friends before she died in fact it could almost be said they were the worst of enemies. She certainly wasn't the first person she'd trained who'd died. If she was being truly honest with herself though she knew exactly why it'd affected her so much; it was all due to the fact Kat reminded her so much of herself. She'd recognized the same type of destruction she'd seen in her own eyes on so many occasions.

She felt like she was entering a pit of despair and she needed some relief from it. The only way she'd been able to get that since returning from New Caprica was with Lee and she was missing him intently. She was more than aware the last time she'd been with Lee had left him confused; and he wasn't the only one. She felt much the same way. And it had definitely left them both disappointed and unfulfilled which was a rare occurrence for both of them. In fact it was the first time she hadn't been able to get what she needed from Lee and it was all down to her. She knew that. It had left her feeling not much of anything and she hoped Lee knew why it had been the way it was. It was nothing to do with him and she hoped he realized that.

She realized when this first started that what the two of them were doing had a finite shelf life to it and she was starting to think the end was near; approaching much faster than she would have liked. She wasn't sure how she felt about having this knowledge when there was nothing she could do about it. One thing she did know; there was little in her life she really cared about at the moment but if she lost Lee, the one link to her sanity she really had left, she wasn't sure what was really keeping her here. It certainly wasn't her husband. When it first started their relationship had been good. It had been different and it was what she'd needed at the time as it meant she could avoid the rapidly developing and confusing feelings for her best friend and boss. Whatever it had been then that most definitely wasn't the case now, even more so since New Caprica. She'd freely admit her marriage was failing – she'd pretty much said so to Lee on one occasion. What it was she really needed was someone else's husband. And that made her feel bad; a guilt that wasn't normally in Kara's remit.

When she'd initially returned from New Caprica, things between Kara and Sam had been good, for a couple of days anyway. Then the full reality of everything she'd been through had caught up with her, combined with the fact she was struggling to become part of the crew again and it had been downhill from there. Kara thought back to just before the dance when she'd told Sam that being with him was exactly what she needed but really that was about as far from the truth as she could possibly get. She just hadn't realized it then. That was before the dance; everything changed after it; really though it was probably during the dance the change really occurred. The second she'd seen Lee in the ring with Helo something changed within her. His reaction to her after his bout only intensified the feelings within her. That moment was definitely the beginning of the end for her marriage but she still held back from making the final decision to end it; because that would mean she'd then have to admit what it really was she wanted. What she really needed was the former Commander of Pegasus; one Lee Adama. She did know one thing for certain though; she couldn't give Sam what he needed and wanted. He'd been quite clear with her ever since New Caprica; he wanted a proper marriage. When she became involved with the members of the resistance in punishing Cylon sympathizers the decline really started in their relationship. They'd argued quite a bit ever since then as Sam hadn't wanted to be involved and was disappointed when she did. There had been a couple of times when things were good between them but they were few and far between these days. Kara couldn't give him what she wanted though; her heart just wasn't in it; it was permanently lodged elsewhere.

Thinking of her husband only made her feel worse and she reached for the bottle of Ambrosia on the shelf at the top of her bunk. She took a large swig from the bottle and swallowed it quickly, hoping to wash away the memories she was edging towards. Every time she thought about Sam, her thoughts drifted involuntarily to the time she spent on New Caprica; back to the captivity she'd suffered at the hands of Leoben and that was the last thing she needed to think about now; she was miserable enough as it was. More Ambrosia was drunk quickly until her head was spinning more than a little but she still couldn't escape the thoughts that were plaguing her.

She put down the bottle, knowing it wasn't helping and rolled from her bunk. She put on her shoes and made her way out into the corridor, towards the gym. Within a few minutes she'd donned some gloves and was ferociously punching the bag, trying to annihilate the images once and for all from her mind. After almost an hour, she'd managed to work off some of her aggression and the tension she'd been feeling. Any buzz she'd got from the alcohol had now disappeared completely. The gym wasn't anywhere near as good as spending time with Lee and nor was it flying but it was definitely a close third.

It still didn't quite scratch the itch she had and she knew she'd get no real rest until she managed to do just that. She made her way back to quarters, and then on to the head. After she'd showered she made her way to the Rec. room. Maybe there'd be a Triad game she could join, maybe that would help. It certainly couldn't make her feel any worse. As she walked in she saw Helo, Athena and Hotdog; with cards and Ambrosia; things seemed just a fraction brighter as she sat in the chair next to Helo and watched them play the hand. Athena was just about to deal her in for the next hand when the hatch to the room opened and Gaeta entered the room, looking harassed. "We need a pilot to go down to the surface on a shuttle run. Gonzo's come down with a stomach bug."

"I'll do it. I could do with stretching my legs a little." Kara volunteered quickly; her heart already starting to race. She rose to her feet, turning back to the table, "Sorry guys. Maybe some other time." She sauntered out of the room, her step suddenly lighter as she realized she was going to get to fly, even if it was only briefly, and she'd probably also get to see Lee. The only downside was the chance of getting Lee by himself were small; probably even non-existent but she could only hope something would make it happen. At least she'd get to see him.

****

The flight took very little time; not enough time in Kara's opinion for her to really enjoy it but at least it got her off Galactica and closer to Lee. She just needed to work out how to get some time alone with him while she was down there. Maybe Sam would be busy and she could get Lee by himself; she hoped so; she had some making up to do. However short-lived this thing with Lee was, she didn't want another occurrence like the last time they were together.

She landed the shuttle with ease on the surface of the planet and made her way to the exit of the ship. As the door rose it revealed the newly named Algae planet to her for the first time. The dry heat hit her with a force that wasn't as welcoming as she'd thought it would be after the cold of being on Galactica. Every now and again she felt a gust of wind which blew the sandy surface up into the air, coating everything it came into contact with. There was also an off-putting aroma that made her stomach turn. She could already tell that being on the surface of this planet for the duration the teams had been down here so far wasn't a fun experience. She walked down the wing and the heat continued to make its impact felt; she could already feel sweat already running down the inside of her flight suit. It wasn't pleasant.

She looked up as she stepped onto the surface of the planet and saw many people already making their way towards her. Three people in particular caught her attention. First she saw Sam walking her way; a wide smile on his face. He reached her first and swept her up into a hug, lifting her off the floor as he did so. She looked over his shoulder at the two people closest behind him. The second person to catch her attention was Dee, who had something between a smirk and a scowl on her face. Dee was standing slightly in front of Lee, the last person Kara looked at. Kara knew Dee was trying to stake a claim on him, to warn her from trying anything with him. Like that would ever stop Kara.

She held his eyes intently in her gaze as Sam continued to hug her; everything else but him looking at her paling into insignificance. Sam was saying something to her, but she wasn't paying attention to a word he was saying. All her focus was on Lee. She could see he was torn between being happy she was there and miserable because the likelihood of the two of them getting any time alone were miniscule, and shrinking as the seconds passed.

Other people also arrived and the equipment she'd brought down to the surface was quickly taken from inside the large storage area of the ship. Sam had released his hold on her by this time and she stood watching the activity around her; suddenly thinking maybe she should've stayed on Galactica rather than put herself through this. She'd thought she'd feel better when she laid eyes on him but now she knew that seeing Lee and knowing she probably wouldn't be able to spend any time with him was worse than not seeing him at all. The next hour or so was going to be torture, she knew it.

She could see the same disappointment she was feeling reflected on Lee's face and it only made her feel worse; the last thing she'd intended was to make him bad. She'd already done enough of that in the past. The now obvious smirk on Dee's face was only adding to her misery. Lee turned and walked away from them all towards the tent-like structure at the far side of the makeshift camp that had been set up. After a small pause, Dee turned and followed him, jogging slightly to catch up with him. Kara's heart sank but made a slight recovery as she watched the two of them walking away. Dee had put her hand on Lee's arm once she'd finally caught up with him; she was obviously saying something. Kara couldn't hear what was being said but her mind was doing everything it could to imagine what it was. She did see Lee react to whatever Dee said though and it left little doubt in her mind just what was happening. His hand went to hers, which was still on his arm and he pushed it away from him with some force. He was talking to her harshly, again Kara couldn't make out what he was saying but from the way the two of them were standing she could tell things weren't too rosy in the Adama marriage. This thought alone managed to make her feel a little better. Lee walked away from Dee, continuing his trek to the tent. Dee had stopped following him now and stood, also watching him walk away; Kara stared at the two of them as she stood near the ship. Dee turned her focus onto Kara as her husband left her sight and Kara could feel the weight of Dee's stare on her and refused to rise to the bait.

Kara turned and walked towards Sam, smiling as she saw him look at her. As she drew level with him, his arm went round her shoulder. The weight of his arm on her was nice but it wasn't Lee. It still didn't feel quite right but it was her only option currently. They walked for a while until there was only the two of them around. "How've you been, Sammy?"

"Busy and dusty." He moved closer to her, putting his other arm around her waist. "What about you?"

"It's kind of slow up there. There's not much to do when we're above here."

"You must've been desperate to get down here…"

She stared at him and could see he was looking at her, studying her for a reaction. He was expecting her to react in some way and that automatically began to frak her off. As she absorbed his words she was fairly sure they were heading towards an argument that would rival that of the Adama's from earlier. The fact that what he'd said was true didn't help but increase her temper. "What are you trying to say, Sam?" Her tone was instantly harsh as she spoked and her words seemed to have the same affect on him that his had on her.

"I just wondered if you came to see me or if it was someone else you wanted to see and be with." His tone had turned a little bitter.

"Sam… I came here because they were short a pilot. I volunteered because I was going stir crazy up there. There was no ulterior motive behind it." It was a little lie but one she could live with. She pulled away from him and sat on a nearby crate. "I'm here with you aren't I? What more do you want, Sam?"

"I want my wife to want to be with me. I want you to actually be here with me when you're here, not thinking about lover boy."

She tried to hide her reaction but was sure he'd have noticed the wince at the way he'd described Lee. She decided to run; her usual habit. "I'm not doing this now." She started to walk away from him.

He called across the space between them. "Why not? I think now is a great time to discuss this."

She spoke with equal force over her shoulder. "I need to get back to Galactica shortly. Let's not ruin the time we've got together by fighting."

"I thought fighting and frakking were what you did best, Kara." There was a certain amount of disgust in his voice now.

She couldn't do this now. She knew coming down to the surface would be a huge mistake; and she wasn't wrong. "I'm going to go. I'll see you around sometime, Sam."

"At least you weren't stupid enough to deny there was something going on between the two of you."

She refused to answer him and walked away, leaving him watching her go. She walked back to the shuttle and found the area completely deserted; her ship fully loaded with the stored algae to take back to the Fleet. Shaking her head she climbed up the ramp and started to go through pre-flight procedure. She worked in silence for a couple of minutes; suddenly eager to get back to Galactica.

"You're going already?"

His voice startled her from what she was doing and she swiveled round in her seat to look at him as he stood in the doorway at the top of the wing. She watched as Lee sat in the seat next to her before turning back to continue what she'd been doing. "I thought I might as well head back. There wasn't much here for me to do and there's a Triad game in the Rec. room I wanted to get back to."

"I thought you were with Anders?" His voice was soft but she could hear the tension in it.

"I was."

He was watching her, she could feel him looking at her and she tried to keep a passive look on her face, which was difficult as she remembered the argument with her husband. Sam didn't realize how wrong he was in his accusation earlier. It wasn't Lee she was thinking about when she was with him. She wished it was; things would be much easier for her if it was. The truth was, whenever she was with him, it was as if she was back on New Caprica and it was Leoben she was with. She tried to stifle the shiver that went through her as her thoughts turned to the Cylon again.

"Is everything okay?"

She nodded, unable to speak for the lump that formed in her throat at his words. She did a bit more of the pre-flight, trying to think about something else rather than the man who was sitting next to her or the Cylon that plagued her dreams. "We had a fight."

"Oh." There wasn't much else he could say.

"Yeah." She looked at him quickly, trying to gauge his reaction to her next words. "He knows about us."

"I guess it was only a matter of time before he found out." He didn't say anything for a few minutes, scared to even ask the next question. "So what now?"

"What do you mean?" She was fearful about what he was asking.

"Do you want this to end?" She shook her head, tears forming in her eyes at the very thought of making that fateful decision. She looked at him again, getting caught in his gaze. "Are you sure?" His words sounded so hesitant.

"Lee, that's the last thing I want."

Tears were pooling in her eyes rapidly now and Lee could see they were about to fall. He reached for her, pulling her into his arms and kissing the top of her head. There was silence again for a while as they stayed close to each other. "Dee knows as well. I think it was probably her that told Sam."

"I figured as much." She whispered, once more breathing in the scent that defined Lee so distinctly. "Kiss me, Lee."

He did as she asked, softly placing his lips on hers and tentatively moving his mouth against it. She let his tongue into her mouth and pushed hers against it, getting caught up in the moment. His hand was in her hair, holding her head in place. He just wanted to make her feel better. He hated seeing her upset like this and if he wasn't here with her right now he'd be knocking some sense into her husband. He should be treating her better than this – although it was to his advantage that he wasn't. He just wished he could spend longer with her now.

"I'd better be getting back to Galactica." She kissed him again briefly. "I'm sorry for how things were last time we were together. I never meant to be like that with you."

"It's okay. I know Kat's death's really affected you."

"It's weird; we weren't exactly friends when she was alive. I feel like a hypocrite being like this after the rows we used to have."

"It's because you were so like each other. That's why you didn't get on and that's why her death has hit you so bad."

His words were correct and she needed to change the subject before she started blubbing again. She didn't know what it was about things at the moment but everything Lee said had the propensity to make her cry. "I'll try and get down here again; maybe we can spend a bit more time alone together next time."

"I'll see what I can sort out. Maybe dad can get you to bring some paperwork down to me."

"I'll try and get that to happen, now get back to work, soldier." She winked at him and smiled at him tenderly, grabbing his hand in hers as he started to get to his feet. "Go careful, okay."

"You too." He kissed her again; sorry that was all they would be able to do on this visit. "See you soon."

He walked out of the shuttle and she closed the door. She started the engines and saw him watching her leave through the front screen as she took off from the surface. Despite the small amount of time she'd spent with Lee she felt a little better. She was still frustrated and most certainly horny but it was good to see him. She'd been able to apologize to him as well so all in all it wasn't a completely wasted trip. It had felt fantastic for him to hold her in his arms; she just wished they'd been able to do more.

Her time spent with Sam wasn't overly surprising either; things between them had been tense for quite a while now. Her relationship with Lee wasn't helping the situation as she wanted to spend as much time with him as she could. Lee was too important to her. She needed him in her life, in whatever capacity that would be. She wasn't so sure she felt the same way about her husband.

****

Lee watched as her shuttle took off from the surface of the planet. He sighed as he watched it fly back out of the atmosphere. He wished he'd been able to spend more time with her. And he definitely wished they'd been able to do more than just kiss. It felt like such a long time since he'd been able to touch her. The last time hadn't been good for either of them as she wasn't really feeling in the right frame of mind for the hook-up. The time before that had been two days earlier and had been fantastic. So all in all he was desperate for some alone time with her.

He knew he could turn to his wife if he wanted to get laid but he couldn't do that to himself or Dee. It would be wrong and unfair to her. Mainly though it was because doing that was just about the last thing he wanted to do. He walked back to the tent which was the central command point for the algae collection mission and where he spent most of his time. He'd even slept there a couple of times, any place was better than going back to the tent his wife slept in. He knew he needed to face up to the mess that was currently masquerading as his marriage soon but couldn't quite get the energy to deal with it for the time being. Another reason holding him back from making that final maneuver was he was scared it would push Kara into ending things. He was fairly sure if he was to end things with Dee, Kara would assume he was expecting her to leave Sam and get together with him. While he wasn't opposed to that happening, he knew it could push Kara too far and would probably end up finishing things between the two of them. Permanently.

Lee was eager to get back to Galactica for many reasons but seeing Kara was one of them. Actually it was the main one. Getting away from this heat and dust was also quite an attractive prospect at the moment.

TBC


	8. Chapter 3 part 2

A/N: Firstly I apologize for the couple of sentences in the last part which don't make sense. Apparently I shouldn't try and check any chapter when I haven't slept for more than three hours a night for the last two weeks. I've made a more concerted effort to ensure there aren't any errors this time but I can't promise anything as my sleep patterns are still bad.

Anyway on with the story - another OSS (Obligatory Shower Scene) in this part... but needs must. :-) Thanks for the reviews so far - long may they continue.

**Chapter 3: Trapped.**

**Part 2.**

The next couple of days passed slowly for Kara. She was still missing Lee. In fact her sojourn to the planet had really only made things worse for her. As Deputy CAG she was in charge of the pilots in Lee's absence and they were certainly feeling the harsher side of her tongue as she struggled with everything she was currently feeling. She knew she was being a bitch but she was extremely bored and missing Lee deeply. Since her return from the planet she was also feeling a little guilty about the argument with Sam; knowing he was right, they did need to talk about things but she wasn't sure exactly what it was she wanted to say to the questions he was going to ask and all of that began to affect her mood as well.

Karl and Athena were the only pilots who'd talk to her when she was off duty and Kara couldn't say she blamed any of the others for keeping away from her. Her temper was on a really short fuse and the only reason Karl could get away with saying any of the stuff he did was because he could see what she was going through and understood the forbidden love she was trying to deal with.

On the second day after her visit to the planet she got the chance to do another trip down to the planet once more. She was nervous as she prepared for the short flight to the surface; she was unsure how this trip was going to go. She knew she was going definitely going to see Lee and that made her feel a great deal better; but she knew she'd probably see Sam as well which didn't bode well for improving her mood. She started to feel more apprehensive as she did her pre-flight check, this time sitting in a Raptor. Members of the deck crew were loading a few supplies and equipment into the back but she was only partially aware of the noise they were creating. Her thoughts were on Lee – which wasn't really anything new in recent days.

She got the all clear from CIC to take off and soon she was en route to the surface. She took the short time flying to prepare herself mentally for what she was about to face. She forced herself to take a deep breath after she landed before moving towards the exit of the Raptor. She wasn't sure what was going to happen in the next few minutes and also who was going to be there to welcome her this time. She kept telling herself she wasn't sure who she wanted to see either but that was a lie. She knew who she wanted to see; she wanted to see Lee; she wanted him there to greet her. She also knew who she didn't want to see; she didn't want to see either of their spouses.

She pushed the button to open the hatch and this time she wasn't affected quite as much by the heat as she'd been the first time she'd been here. Sam didn't appear this time and for that she was wholly relieved but Lee wasn't there either which was much more disappointing to her than she'd expected it to be. Galen and Callie Tyrol both walked over to meet her and she made small talk with them for a few minutes, passing on the small amounts of gossip she was aware of from Galactica. She was also quick to update both of them about Nicky who was still up on the ship. Kara could see they were both tired and knew they were both missing their child greatly. That, along with the arduous work they were doing was hard on both of them.

She saw Lee approaching from the distance and her attention was briefly diverted from the conversation she was having. She smiled slightly before turning her attention back to the two deckhands talking to her. There was a bubble of anticipation welling in her stomach that burst as she saw the communications officer trailing behind her husband, also walking her way. Fantastic – just about the last person she wanted to see; the only person worse would've been her own husband. Then she remembered the plan she'd managed to put together, with a little assistance from Karl, and knew she was going to be okay. They both were.

As Lee reached her side, Galen and Callie moved off, stepping into the Raptor to help remove the last of the stuff she brought to the surface. She turned to face Lee, "Major Adama, sir," a smirk gracing her face.

"It's good to see you, Captain Thrace. How are things up there?"

"Missing their CAG, sir, but other than that, it's business as usual."

"Really?"

She shrugged. "It's kind of quiet. No fun when the Cylons aren't around." She wasn't looking at him, but was watching the Raptor being unloaded of supplies and then loaded with more of the algae she already despised.

He smiled at her words, knowing she was bored to tears of patrolling over the surface of the planet. "I remember what it's like to be stationed above a planet. There's certainly not much fun to be had."

"I don't know, Lee. We were more than able to make our own fun while we were above New Caprica." His wife had butted into their conversation; an unwelcome addition to the party.

Lee grimaced as he heard her words but refused to look away from Kara; still standing with his back to his wife. "I thought you were busy coordinating the dispersal of stored algae among the Fleet?"

"I came to see if there was anything you needed me to do here."

"You should go back to what you were doing, Lieutenant Dualla. There's nothing for you to do here." There was a sting to his voice which he tried to soften as he noticed her wince. He spoke once more, but this time in a nicer tone. "I'll be back shortly."

Dee stared at him intently before turning and walking back in the direction she'd come from. The two of them watched her go and Kara felt her heart rate increase as she took each step further from them. She looked at Lee again and put her hand on his arm. He looked into her eyes as she touched him. "I've missed you so much, Lee."

"I've missed you too. I wish we could spend some time together, just the two of us." His voice was quiet but the words sent a thrill through her which gave her a reminder of just what she'd been missing.

"I may have some good news for you then."

"And that would be?"

"Admiral Adama and President Roslin have requested your presence back up there for a meeting tomorrow. Also Captain Agathon wants to see you this evening to discuss some crew issues he wants to make you aware of."

"Crew issues?"

"Morale problems apparently."

"Anyone in particular."

"I've heard the deputy CAG is quite miserable. It appears to be affecting the rest of the pilots in a detrimental way."

He almost smiled at her words; although he was instantly worried about her. The last thing he wanted was for her to be miserable. "I guess I need to speak to Captain Agathon then to see if we can come up with a way to improve crew morale." Now he did smile at her. "I'd better go and sort things out here then before I go back with you."

"I guess you should." She was still avoiding meeting his eyes.

"I'll be back in a bit. Maybe you should go speak to Anders. He can probably use a bit of a morale boost as well."

Again he was walking away from her and she was left wondering if he really thought she would go and see Sam. He was right though; she should probably go and see her husband and talk about things but she just couldn't do it. Her mood was bad enough as it was. She didn't want to make it even worse by going to see him. She couldn't see it ending any way other than an argument like the last time she'd been here.

****

There was a charged atmosphere in the cabin as the two of them flew back to Galactica. Neither of them had spoken since she taken off from the planet. It was as if both of them were scared that if they spoke, they'd change things irrevocably. Neither pilot was sure they were prepared to take that step.

After about twenty minutes they were about halfway back to Galactica. Lee sighed and Kara looked at him, quickly. He'd seemed a little subdued since he'd arrived back at the Raptor and she could only assume things hadn't gone well with his wife. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself before she spoke. "Problem?"

"No. Everything's fine." He shifted slightly in his seat and she immediately spotted it.

"You're lying."

"That's all I seem to do these days. I'm quite the expert." He was quiet for a few seconds. "I'm just frustrated about the way things are between me and Dee. We just had a row about the fact I had to go back up here. She thinks I've somehow managed to wangle this to happen so I can get away from her."

"You didn't do anything; it was me that organized this." He couldn't help but notice the smirk on her face as she said it.

"You did. I guess the problem is I'm glad you did. I needed to get away from there; from her; from everything. I want to spend time with you. She knows all of that and we argued about it."

"Oh." She felt bad for him and she felt guilty that she'd made him feel that way. All of a sudden the idea she'd thought was so brilliant an hour earlier now seemed truly selfish and she wished she'd never suggested the idea. She felt so bad for Lee and yet at the same time her reaction to when he said he wanted to be with her detracted from that a little.

He paused for a few minutes, trying desperately to think of something to say that would change the subject from his wife; his marriage; his messed up life. "So, you said you've been miserable the last few days."

The smile fell from her face. Something else she didn't really want to talk about. She'd told Lee she was miserable and she didn't mind him knowing but knowing she was miserable because she was missing him was difficult for her to say – even to him, "Yes. It's no fun up there since we got here."

"And you've been taking your frustration out on the rest of the pilots? No wonder Karl wants to see me about improving crew morale."

She tried to lighten the mood slightly and end the discussion at the same time. "I'm sure you'll think of some way to improve morale. After all thinking is what you're good at."

"It might take some out-of-the-box thinking." He said; a wide grin on his face; finally lightening the mood in the ship.

"Give me a call if you need any help with that." Her grin was just as big as his and suddenly they were almost back to the flirting with each other that had become part of their day to day life. The previously issues were still lingering in the background though and Kara knew it wouldn't be long before they were raised again.

"I'll bear that in mind."

They were approaching the port side of Galactica now and silence fell as Kara concentrated on landing the Raptor. The door to the Raptor was quickly opened by the deck crew as soon as they were safely secured on the deck. They both walked down the wing and across the flight deck. Soon they were walking side by side down the corridor towards CIC. Lee had his bag slung over his shoulder and was walking easily next to his best friend and secret love. It was obvious for anyone to see that there was an easy closeness between them; much as they tried to pretend there wasn't. They hid it from everyone but the only people who seemed to not see it or realize it was there was each other. They were walking close to each other and every now and then their hands would graze the others, just a small touch, barely enough to probably even count but both of them felt good as they felt the tiny contact restore some of their missed closeness.

They walked into CIC and were greeted by Captain Agathon and Admiral Adama. Both came to attention in front of the Admiral. "Reporting as requested, sir." Lee said to his father.

"At ease, Major, Captain." There was a sparkle to his father's eyes as he looked his son up and down. "How are things going down on the planet, Major?"

"Back on schedule, sir. It's dusty down there though; the stuff gets everywhere. There have been a couple of issues with equipment malfunctions due to dust getting into them, but the Chief and his team have been able to sort them out or replace them fairly easily."

"And there's been no sign of Cylon activity on the surface?"

"None at all, sir. The marines have located a couple of good vantage points and have set up look out posts to keep up a round the clock watch for them."

"Good. Well I'll let you go and get yourself cleaned up. The president and I require your presence at a meeting at 0800 tomorrow morning so get a good nights rest, Major."

Kara had to bite her lip to stop the smile appearing on her face at his words. She knew that while Lee wouldn't be getting anywhere near enough rest; he would probably be feeling a lot better tomorrow morning. If she had anything to do with it, he would anyway. The Admiral turned his attention back to the Dradis screen and she turned her attention to Karl as she struggled to keep a straight face.

"Major Adama, I'd be grateful if you could meet me in your office to discuss some issues we have with the pilots. I'd like to get some insight from you as to how to change things a little."

"What time would you like to meet, Captain Agathon?"

"In a couple of hours should be fine." A sly smile crept onto his face. "I believe you're now off duty, Captain Thrace."

"Yes sir, I made the trip to the surface because no one else was available at the end of my shift."

"I'm sure you and Major Adama have some things you need to discuss regarding your CAG duties. Maybe you can take the next couple of hours to do that before he meets me."

"Yes sir." Kara sent a silent personal thanks to Karl. He'd just given them an excuse to spend the next couple of hours together, without any interruptions. She saluted him and then turned and made her way out of CIC. She could feel Lee following her.

****

They walked down the corridor, again in comfortable silence. "So what do you want to do for the next couple of hours, Lee?" She was hesitant to ask him; afraid she'd be rejected.

"Firstly, I'd like to take a shower and get rid of all this dust."

She smiled, knowing just how bad the dust was and she'd only been there for a short expanse of time; he'd been there for days, she could only imagine just where the stuff had got into. Her smile grew further as her thoughts progressed. "Sounds like a good idea." They walked up to Lee's quarters, the ones he shared with his wife and she followed him into them; not sure why she wanted to be there. She looked around and her eyes scanned the room as he dropped his bag on the floor and made his way to the locker on the other side of the room. She could see the few touches around the room which showed his wife's influence on the surroundings. Kara felt horribly out of place being here, but knew they weren't doing anything wrong. Not yet anyway and she was pretty sure that even she would draw the line at doing anything in his marital bed.

She saw a photo on the wall that drew her attention and walked over to have a closer look. It was a photo of Zak; in fact it was the same photo of Zak she had; the one of her, Zak and Lee she kept in her locker. This photo only showed Zak though, her and Lee were absent from it.

"Dee got it from my dad. She got it framed for me. She wanted me to have something to remind me of Zak." He'd walked up behind her and was looking at it over her shoulder; his hand was on her arm.

"It's a nice photo. It's a good picture of Zak."

"Dad had the photo enlarged after the funeral and she cropped it a little and put it in this frame."

"Cropped it a little? She's even cut you out of the photo."

"Its okay, Kara; I really don't mind. And I don't need a photo of you; I can see you whenever I want… some of the time anyway." She didn't say anything; emotions running through her, memories of Zak and their time together; memories which rapidly changed to those of guilt for being with Lee. The relationship she had with Lee was just as forbidden as the one she'd had with his brother. Then it had been because he was her pupil, now it was because they were both married; and not to each other.

He moved his hand to her waist and she turned her head to look at him. He was also studying the photo of his brother. She could see he was deep in thought, probably remembering when the photo was taken. Her thoughts drifted to back then. It had been a hot summer's day and the three of them had been hiking up in the hills. It was the summer after Zak had finished his first year at Flight school. Lee was about to start on the Olympia the following month. They'd decided to go for the hike because it had been such a hot summer and they all needed a break from everything. She'd been dating Zak for about eight months and it would be a further six months before he asked her to marry him. After lunch they'd continued walking and had come across some other hikers. Zak managed to convince one to take a photo of the three of them as they'd stood in the sunshine. The picture had turned out well and all three of them had got a copy of it. When Zak had died it appeared Bill Adama had taken his son's copy for himself.

"Let's go." Lee's voice was quiet when he spoke. He turned to leave the room and she was quick to follow him; eager to leave the stifling atmosphere in the room, glancing one last time at the photo. They walked down the corridor towards the pilot quarters and the head.

They got to the head and Kara was planning on going on to the pilots' quarters. Lee had other ideas though. He grabbed her hand and pulled her into the head, behind him. The room was empty, which wasn't a huge surprise as it was mid-shift. They walked towards the bench and she sat down on it, watching him strip and then walk towards a cubicle.

He'd gone really quiet again since being in the CIC, even more so since they'd left his quarters and she was beginning to worry about him; she was beginning to worry that he was regretting being with her. She continued to watch him as he stood in the shower. She could tell he'd closed himself off mentally from everything and was either completely unaware of her watching him or he just didn't care; he was definitely in a world of his own. She was watching him intently though; despite his lack of attention to her. She took in the lines of his body as he stood under the flow of water which was now coursing down his body. The water was dirty as it flowed into the drain and she could see streaks appear on his body as the dirt etched on the surface began to wash away, leaving clean skin in its wake. She held her breath as he worked his hands through his hair, trying to clean the dirt and sweat from it. His body was even leaner now than it had been at the dance and she was enjoying the time she could take to admire it. It wasn't something she got to do very often as there was a certain level of decorum that was usually maintained in this room. He turned to face her as he washed the shampoo from his head and she bit her lip as she saw his eyes were closed and there was a look of pure concentration on his face. She was getting hotter as he took the soap in his hands and worked up some lather before vigorously rubbing it over his body. She knew the water would be getting cold by now, but you wouldn't have been able to tell from looking at Lee. His back was to her again now and she looked at his butt as he let the water wash away the soap. He was leaning, arms outstretched against the tiles and his head was lowered, causing the water to beat against the back of his neck before continuing its journey to the floor and down the drain to be recycled.

She wished she was standing under the water with him because she was desperate to cool down. The last few minutes had only increased the feelings of sexual frustration she'd been struggling to cope with for days and the tension was spiraling within her body, looking for a way to relieve itself. She was about to move her hand to press her clit through her pants when Lee spoke.

"Kara…" It was barely a whisper but it might as well have been a shout for the effect it had on her.

His voice caused her to jump and she almost fell off the bench she was sitting on. She rose to her feet, taking a couple of steps closer to him. Her hand reached out in front of her as she took a few more steps. She rested her hand on his back, near the base of his neck, her fingers softly reaching into his hair. He shivered as he felt her hand touch him and he looked at her over his shoulder. There was a haunted look in his eyes that caused her breath to falter. "Are you okay, Lee?" she whispered, scared that one wrong word would lose him to her completely. He shook his head and closed his eyes. She stepped forward, so she was in the spray of water but barely noticing; all concentration firmly fixed on Lee. "What's wrong? Talk to me… please."

"I just need you to hold me?" The harsh whisper passed his lips.

She stepped forward more and wrapped her arms around him, plastering her body against his back. She could feel him shaking and she was struggling to work out what was wrong with him. He'd been quiet on the flight back and she knew then it was to do with a fight with his wife but to have suddenly reacted like this; was unusual to say the least. She was going to help him through it though; he'd been there for her many times recently. She owed him as much.

They stood like that for several minutes and gradually his body stopped shaking. She was beginning to get cold but ignored that fact. Now was time for her to just be there for Lee. She released her hold on him and stopped the water. He stayed standing the way he was and she moved to retrieve his towel from the bench, remembering the time not so long ago when he'd done the very same thing for her. She went back to him and wiped his body dry, before wrapping it around his body. She put her hand on his arm and he turned to look at her. He looked pale and drawn; so much more tired than he'd been earlier. Grabbing the rest of his things from the bench, she took his hand in hers and pulled him behind her as she walked to the pilots' quarters; once more glad there was no one around to see them.

Once they got there, it became obvious she needed to change into dry clothes, so she quickly removed what she'd been wearing and pulled on some cargo pants and her hooded top, not bothering with anything underneath it. Lee stood by her bunk and Kara could feel the weight of his stare as he watched her dress. She stood in front of him once she was finished, her hand going to his face and caressing his cheek. His eyes closed as she touched his face and she stood on her tiptoes and kissed him softly. There was no reaction from him to her kiss but she hadn't really expected any. He wasn't really responding to anything. She let go of him and backed away, moving to the clean clothes he'd taken with him to the head. Rooting through the pile she pulled some boxers from it and helped his feet into them, pulling them up his body. The towel fell from his waist as she did but she left it on the floor where it fell. She didn't bother putting any of the other clothes on him and turned back to face him.

The tension in his body was evident and he seemed unwilling or unable to relax. She took his hand in hers and pulled him closer to her. When he was standing in front of her she pushed him to sit on her bunk. He just stared at her, wide-eyed. "Lie on your front." He did as she said, not questioning her for a second. She climbed into the bunk after him, straddling him and sitting on his bum. She leaned forward and pulled the curtain shut, away from any prying eyes that may appear. Then she reached above his head and flicked the switch to turn on the soft light in her bunk so she could see what she was doing. Her hands fell on his back and she could feel the tension simmering beneath the surface of the skin. She started to massage it, concentrating on each knot she came across. She was concerned he wouldn't be up to the meeting with Karl. She needed to sort him out, so he could be in some sort of form for it. She knew she could do it but she wasn't sure she had long enough. She glanced at the time and saw there was just over an hour. It wasn't long, but it would have to do.

Lee groaned as she rubbed at a particularly large knot in his shoulder and a smile appeared on her face before she continued with her mission. After just over thirty minutes, all tension had disappeared from his body and she could no longer tell if he was still awake. She moved off him and lay on the bunk, next to him so she was facing him. His head was turned towards her but his eyes were shut so she still wasn't sure. She studied his face and saw it finally looked a lot more relaxed than it had. She stared at him, looking at how his face had changed over the years she knew him. He'd aged obviously but not excessively. When she first met him he was very cynical about everything, he took things far too seriously and rarely knew how to have fun. To a certain extent he was still much the same way but he was surprisingly a lot less cynical now than he'd been in the whole time she'd known him. Maybe it was because his relationship with his father had improved, especially since the war with the Cylons had renewed. Even when she first knew him, before Zak died, Lee hadn't got on with his father; things hadn't been sweetness and light with his mother either although both the Adama boys had been reluctant to talk about that. Lee had had a much more difficult childhood than most people would assume, given his surname and the alleged privileges that entailed. She knew better than most that really all being an Adama really gave Lee was an expectation of the levels he should achieve. In some ways Zak had it even harder than Lee because he was then following in the footsteps of his brother as well as his dad, the war hero.

His hand moved from where it had being lying and he placed it on hers; distracting her from her thoughts. She looked at their hands and smiled as his fingers laced with hers. "Thanks," he said, still barely audible.

"You want to talk about it?"

"Later, after I've met Karl."

"Okay." Her other hand went to his face, again placing it on his cheek. "I'm worried about you."

"Don't be. I'll be okay, I promise. As long as you're here I'll be fine."

Those few words were said with such ease and yet they hinted at so much between them. Kara felt a blush creep up her face and fidgeted slightly under his gaze; lifting her head slightly to look at the time. "You probably should get ready for your meeting with Karl. Somehow I doubt he'd appreciate you turning up dressed like you are now, although I do believe it may go some way to improving crew morale." She saw him smile slightly and knew she'd been right to try and lift the mood a bit.

"Cute." He muttered as he pushed himself to a sitting position. He grabbed his clean clothes from where she'd left them and began to dress. "Do you have something I can use on my hair?" She smiled as she sat up. His hair was a mess; very un-Lee-like. She brought her hands to his head and ran her fingers through it, trying to get it to at least lie vaguely flat. It sort of worked, not entirely but it was passable.

"Go." She smiled at him encouragingly and was pleased when he leaned forward and kissed her tenderly. It was a long kiss that didn't really increase or decrease in passion. It just was. Kara found it more comforting than anything she'd been expecting from him. As it finally ended, Lee drew back from her; both staring into each other's eyes.

"Will you still be here when I come back?"

"Yep. I still need my morale boost… I'll be waiting." They shared a smile until he walked away to his meeting. She watched him go; still wondering just what was bothering him so much. He seemed better than he'd been just an hour earlier but he still wasn't completely right. She was worried about him. She lay back down, trying to get some much needed sleep as she waited for him to return.

TBC

A/N2: I know it's a wicked place for me to stop - but if you review I'll put the next chapter out quicker! Next time... Kara gets her morale boosted... :-)


	9. Chapter 3 part 3

**A/N:** Thanks for all the reviews so far. Here's the next part and as promised Kara gets just the morale boost she needs... although it's not all plain sailing.

I hope you all like it - please let me know what you think.

**Chapter 3: Trapped.**

**Part 3.**

It was nearly two hours later and Lee was walking back towards the pilots' quarters. He really owed his thanks to Kara. If it wasn't for her he never would've made it to the meeting, and it was important he went to it. It would have been even if he hadn't been ordered there. He hadn't realized before how low morale was within the crew. He knew times had been tough for the Fleet since they'd left New Caprica and a lot of people were feeling low about the Cylons being after them again but he hadn't realized how bad it was. The food shortage obviously wasn't helping either. He was yet to be convinced the algae they were collecting from the planet would resolve that situation, he wasn't even sure if it was better than no food.

He'd reached the pilots' quarters now and pushed open the door, peeking round the corner. The room was still mercifully empty. He walked into the room, quietly closing the hatch behind him. He glanced at his watch, it would be a few hours until shift ended so there was a chance they wouldn't be disturbed. He walked towards her bunk and pulled back the curtain, smiling when he saw her still inside. Part of him had thought she wouldn't be there. He took off his shoes and climbed in as carefully as he could so he wouldn't disturb her, closing the curtain so they were shut off from the rest of the room once more. He lay down beside her, seeing she was asleep; rolling onto his side to face her. He stared at her face, feeling the love he felt for her intensify as the seconds passed; he wished the two of them could be together for the rest of their lives. He was finally able to admit it to himself now; he finally knew what he wanted. The problem was, much as he wanted that it seemed more unlikely as the days passed that he'd ever get it; it was something he was still scared to admit to her. Her hair had fallen over her face so he reached forward and pushed it away, tucking it behind her ear. She smiled slightly as his finger brushed the curve of her ear but she didn't wake.

The urge to kiss her increased and he leant forward, softly placing his lips on hers. The kiss deepened as she woke and began to kiss him back. Her hand came up to the back of his head, holding him in place. His tongue danced against hers as it swept around her mouth and he felt her smile as he did so. He felt her other hand clutching at his, grasping for it and then gripping it like a vice. She pulled her mouth from his, a smile still on her face. "You're back."

He kissed her tenderly on the lips and smiled at her again. "I came straight here from the meeting with Karl, like I said I would."

She knew that hadn't been what she'd really meant but she didn't say anything. Whatever she'd meant he now seemed more like the Lee she loved than he'd done earlier and for that she was grateful. She was still worried about him though. She wanted to know what had caused him to shut down like he had earlier. Getting him to tell her would take some effort on her part though. An effort she was sure to enjoy. "How did it go?"

"I hadn't realized things were so bad. I'm really frakking things up as CAG, aren't I?"

"No you're not. It's got worse since we've been above the planet. There's not much to do at the moment so it's made everything more prominent. You haven't been here most of that time, so you haven't seen it. Don't beat yourself up about it, Lee. You can't change the situation we're in." She paused, licking her lips causing his eye line to flicker to her mouth, staying there for several seconds before returning to look her in the eyes. "You need to relax a little, Lee. Stop taking things so seriously."

"Things are serious. We're in a serious situation."

"You're not the only person around to deal with it all Lee. You need to be able to have fun as well as do the serious stuff when you have to."

"Have fun?" He cocked his head to one side slightly and looked at her again. "Is that where you come into it?"

"If you want me to." She smiled widely at him.

He rolled onto his back and pulled her on top of him. "I guess I could use some fun and I need to work on your morale as well. It'd be a shame not to kill two birds with one stone."

She looked down at him before kissing him softly on the lips. She pulled away from him; a mocking smile on her face. "You were doing so well, Lee and then you go and ruin it by talking about killing. It kind of takes the edge off things." She pulled away further; pretending to be upset by what he'd said.

He didn't buy a word she was saying and he pulled her back towards him; holding her against his body. "Bull. I know killing Cylons does nothing but put you in the mood. What I just said would do little to dampen your mood." He pushed her hair behind her ear again as it fell to cover her face. His hand moved slightly to cup her cheek and he brushed his thumb across her face. "You forget Kara, I know you too well." His smile matched hers as they lay with each other in silence for a couple of minutes. She sat up again and his hand fell from her face and moved down her arm as she pulled herself up. He took the bottom of her top between his fingers; his other hand joining his first and both pulled on her top tentatively. A softer smile was now on her face as she watched him move one hand up the top and slowly start to lower the zip. The cool air hitting her skin as it was exposed to the room was a welcome relief to her overheating flesh. His fingers ghosted over the skin he'd revealed, causing her to shiver with desire. His thumb grazed her nipple and the desire spiked straight to her groin. She could see the similar desire he was feeling in his eyes as he looked up at her and she knew he would see the same thing in hers. The days separated from each other had only heightened the emotions they were both now feeling. Her mouth opened as he once again pulled the zip a little lower and then completely unfastened it. Lee's other hand moved to pull one side of her top from her shoulder before lowering to caress her other breast. He'd moved to a sitting position by now and was kissing her neck and nipping at the base of her ear. The other side of her top was removed from her shoulder and fell to the bunk behind her, revealing her completely to the cool air and also to Lee.

She was pleased he seemed to have gotten over his earlier despondency but all thoughts got swept away as his fingers continued their earlier mission. Lee had very talented hands and he was putting them to good use. Her head dropped back, exposing her neck to his mouth again. She gasped as the feel of his hands and tongue on her body combined to a heady sensation coursing through her. Kara whispered his name over and over as he continued to cover her body with his hands and mouth. She ground herself against him, feeling his enjoyment at what they were doing directly beneath her. Her body was tightening and she knew she was going to come before he was even undressed. That thought alone pushed her closer to the edge and she ground her hips against him again, trying to increase the pressure on her clit so she reached that point.

"You're wearing far too many clothes, Lee." Her voice was urgent as she fought to get the words out.

He hummed in agreement, his mouth still against her skin causing another gasp to leave her mouth. She knew he hadn't really heard what she'd said so she grabbed him by the collar of his jacket and pulled him away from her body with great reluctance. He looked at her, wide-eyed as she worked on the buttons of his jacket. He helped her as she pushed the jacket off his shoulders, both having to work hard to remove his arms from each sleeve. He needed to get back to kissing her again, soon. His tanks were hauled off his body with some agitation from Kara; he smiled as he saw the desperation fraying at the edges of her desire. He grabbed her waist and pulled her hips closer to him, putting her directly in contact with his cock, even through the clothing. She wasn't the only one who was desperate to increase the pace of their progress.

He took the top of her cargo pants in his fingers and undid the buttons that held them closed. His hand was quick to work its way into her underwear, touching the heated flesh within them. She bit her lip as his fingers touched her, closing her eyes as they rubbed against her clit; she was sure she was going to break the skin of her lip she was biting it with such force. He kissed her again which stopped her biting it further. One finger entered her, burying itself deep within her and as he curved it round to hit that one spot, stars burst behind her eyes. She wrenched her mouth from his as he added another finger, increasing the intensity she was feeling and causing her to moan softly.

Lee had never thought it could be better between them than it had been previously. He was wrong. This was the best it had ever been. His cock was so hard it was almost bursting through his pants. He needed to be in her but he wanted her to feel as much pleasure as he could possibly give her so he held off, teasing each moment of joy from her. After what she'd done for him earlier, it was the least she deserved. He wished sex for him could always be like this. Sex with Dee was perfunctory; when it did happen which hadn't been for a while. There was nothing special to it. It certainly didn't blow his mind and the only way he'd ever reach orgasm with her was to think of Kara. It had been all he could do to not moan her name in the throes of passion, not that it had ever got that passionate between them. He was fairly sure he wasn't the only one who held back. He always got the impression Dee was holding back just as much as he was. It was as if she was afraid of showing him just how she felt about him. Maybe she was worried to feel that much so it would hurt less if it ever ended. He mentally shook thoughts of his wife from his head. He should be concentrating on Kara now, not thinking of Dee.

All thoughts flew from his head as her hand rested on him through his pants. He renewed the movements of his fingers within her, trying to blow her away again. She was so wet and his fingers moved easily in and out of her body. She rose up on her knees a little and he used his free hand to push her pants and underwear down her legs. They didn't get very far, it was impossible to do while she was still straddling his legs. His impatience grew and he frowned deeply as he tried to work out how to do it without breaking the delicious contact he had with her.

Kara was obviously having the same thoughts and had relinquished her touch on him to try and rectify the problem. She moved her legs so she was now kneeling next to him. His fingers nearly slipped from her body and she paused as he pushed them back in and pressed the palm of his hand against her clit. She soon grew impatient with him and pulled on his free hand as she stepped from the bunk to stand just next to it. Her pants and underwear fell to her feet but that wasn't enough for her. The yank on his hand was impetus enough for him to move so he sat on the edge of the bunk. She stood between his legs and her clit was almost level with his eyes. He watched with fascination as he saw his fingers move in and out of her body, the moisture from her glistening on his fingers as they left her depths.

Kara touched his face, trying to draw his attention back up to her, with little success. She smiled, despite her annoyance as she saw a look of concentration and fascination on his face. She bent forward slightly, bringing her breasts into his direct line of sight and managing in one easy move to distract him completely from his previous focus. Her hands moved to his pants, working on the buckle and zip so she could reach the goal she was determined to achieve. Despite his distraction with her breasts, she was almost panting as he added another finger into the mix; still moving them in and out of her body. She knew there was little chance he would have the perceptiveness to stand so she could remove his pants, not without some persuasion from her anyway. His boxers were straining to release it contents and Kara was just as eager to help. Now she just had to get Lee in the picture. As her hand slipped into his boxers, she was rewarded with a slight faltering in the movement of his hand; punctuated with a gasp as she wrapped hers around his cock. Having now finally managed to grab his attention she stroked him firmly a couple of times. He looked at her face, seeing the focused look on her face. She winked at him impishly and he smiled at her. "You need to stand up, Lee. This is going nowhere if you don't take your pants off."

He finally caught on to what she'd been trying to get through to him earlier and rose to his feet; both of them slipping through the curtain and out into the main room. His legs were slightly shaky as her hand moved slowly up and down his length. His fingers were pushed into her, as deep as they would reach. He could feel she was on the edge of another orgasm and he was determined to get her to that peak before he did anything else. Kara was as resolute in achieving her target; namely removing Lee's pants and underwear. She hadn't let up the movement on his cock and that was playing havoc with his feelings as he was trying to get her to give in to hers. Her hand pushed the pants down his legs and he tried valiantly to step out of them, having little triumph. His underwear was removed next; her hand released him as she used both to push them down his thighs. His cock sprang free from its confinement, almost hitting her in the face as she bent down to free him from his clothing.

Finally they were both naked, ready to give into the tumultuous whirlpool of intensity swirling between them. He still couldn't remove his hand from her body, needing to maintain some level of connection with her for as long as he could. What he was doing to her was only serving to increase the arousal he was feeling. Her hand had moved back to his cock and he almost sighed in relief as she began once more to stroke him gently. Her thumb brushed the end, wiping away the drop of pre-cum which sprang forth. She dragged the curtain back and moved to sit on the edge of the bunk; enforcing a distance between them which meant his hand slipped from within her. Both felt the separation keenly but Kara soon replaced the loss as she touched the tip of his cock with her tongue. It was all he could do not to surge his length into her mouth as her tongue, teeth and fingers worked their magic on him. His hands clutched at the edge of the bunk above as she took more of him into her mouth. One hand released its hold on him and moved to caress the sacs below. Inch by inch she caressed his length, taking him further and further into her mouth. This was something she always enjoyed, pleasuring a man and bringing him to a peak in this way was the first way she'd ever been able to express her feelings for a man. With Lee though it was different; there was so much more to it. Sure, it was a way for her to show him how she felt, but she also gained a lot of pleasure from the act as well. She liked seeing the freedom in Lee when she did this for him; she liked the taste of him in her mouth and the feel of his cock as it pulsed in her mouth always excited her. The one thing she truly regretted about this thing between them so far was that she hadn't done this for him nearly enough for her liking, but she was keen to make sure he enjoyed it as often as they possibly could. She ran her tongue up the underside of his cock, feeling the ridge beneath her tongue. She could tell he was close to peaking and he instinctively pushed himself in and out of her mouth a little faster, not something she minded at all. She liked the small loss of control he was showing. It was good to know she had made him feel that way; that he was able to let go like that with her.

A grunt issued from his mouth as he leapt over the edge and plummeted headlong into the abyss she'd laid out before him. She swallowed every drop that surged into her mouth, licking his length clean before releasing him. She looked at him with a smug grin on her face. She held out her hand towards him and he took it in his, they then both made their way back into her bunk, pulling the curtain shut behind them. They lay side by side, staring at each other in companionable silence. Kara looked at him; knowing she was going to have to ask him what had been wrong earlier. He was relaxed again now so she knew he'd be more likely to open up to her. She just had to broach the subject carefully.

She was saved from having to say anything as it was Lee that raised it. "Thanks for earlier, Kara." His voice was soft as he spoke and his eyes held hers for several seconds.

Despite everything she'd just done she could see there was still a shade of something she hadn't seen in his eyes before. Something was still on his mind and she wanted to be there for him, whatever it was. "Do you want to talk about it?" Now he was finally opening up to her she was almost hesitant to ask.

"Not really, but I promised you I'd tell you." He closed his eyes, using the few seconds to mentally put barriers into place. Barriers that shattered as Kara's hand came into contact with his cheek.

"Talk to me, Lee. Let me help you."

His eyes opened and the piercing blue focused on her hazel ones. "It's complicated. Actually it's stupid. I know it's stupid. I keep telling myself it's stupid and you're sure as frak going to tell me it is, but it still bothers me."

"What does?"

"This." That hadn't been what she was expecting him to say and she pulled away from him in shock, her hand falling from his face. His words hurt and she felt tears flooding her eyes as she realized this could possibly be the end and that was the last thing she wanted. They were lying close to each other but suddenly the gap between them seemed to be bigger than it had ever been. "I know this shouldn't be happening. The guilt at what we're doing is eating me up. I feel like I'm betraying my brother… being with you now."

She almost found it amusing that it was his brother he felt he was betraying and not his wife, but chose not to comment on that. She didn't want that to be another nail in the coffin that was their relationship. "Zak's dead, Lee. Whether we're together or apart, that isn't going to change." Her words hurt her as much as she was sure they hurt him. "You're right, it is stupid."

"I said it was stupid. It's not logical, I know that." He sighed sharply. "But its how I feel."

"What are you saying, Lee. Are you saying we should end this?" Tears threatened to fall from her eyes.

"I was thinking about it earlier. I guess I phrased what I just said incorrectly; I should have said its how I felt. After earlier; after what you did for me, I wasn't so sure how I felt. What you did confused me. It helped me but it confused me. Seeing you here when I came back though helped me make my decision. Now I know what I want. I want you, Kara; no one else; just you." She could hardly breathe and it was probably just as well because she was scared that if she did, she'd break the moment and spoil it completely.

Finally though she had to speak; she had to say something that would mean as much to him as what he'd just said to her. "I love you." Her words brought a smile to his face and love was shining from his eyes. "Kara Thrace loves Lee Adama."

He pulled her back into his arms, his hands on her rear, pulling her closer so it was pressed against him. He wanted to touch her again. He wanted things to be back to how they were just a few minutes earlier, before he'd dampened the mood. He kissed her on the mouth, trying to put as much passion as he could into the kiss. She kissed him back with just as much gusto. She grasped his face between her hands as their kiss continued. He rolled them so he was now lying on top of her, pushing himself against her causing her to moan into his mouth. He could feel his arousal increasing and hoped this time he would get to experience being inside her. Something he'd missed so much. His kisses descended down her face and her neck, pausing for a while to repeatedly kiss both her breasts. Once he'd bathed both with kisses, he carried on his descent, pushing his tongue into her naval before moving lower still. Once he was level with her clit he stared at her as she lay, completely exposed in front of him. His hand moved to touch her and she squirmed as his fingers came into contact with her again. He looked up at Kara's face and saw she was watching him with interest. She lifted herself so she was now resting on her forearms so she could see what he was doing. There was more than a little desire present in her eyes as she stared at him. Her face was flushed and her mouth was open as she took shallow breaths.

He changed his attention back to look at his hand as he touched her again. Even though it had been a while since he'd touched her she was still wet and his fingers slid back into her with ease. Again he watched as his digits moved in and out of her body, enthralled with the sight of her body accepting him with such willingness. His cock was once again rigid and he was tempted to touch himself to relieve some of the tension he was feeling but didn't want to run the risk of everything ending too quickly. He wanted them both to enjoy this as much as they could. Who knew when they'd be able to do this again? He looked up at her face and saw a knowing look wash over her face. She knew what he wanted to do. She nodded slightly and he took that as the encouragement he needed. He slowly lowered his face and kissed her tenderly, close to her clit but not quite touching it. His eyes were still focused on hers as his mouth edged ever closer to its target. Her head fell back as his mouth finally touched her on the one spot she'd desired since he'd started. His fingers had increased their speed within her body, pumping in and out in rapid succession. She gasped and moaned as his tongue laved her clit. He sucked on her, feeling her desire increase as he did so. She moved her hips, trying to find purchase on the mattress with her heels to push herself down towards him. One of her hands was touching his head, running her fingers through his hair; gentle in its presence, yet also holding him firmly in place. His desire was increasing just as much as hers was. His hand was coated with her juices and he paused kissing her briefly to taste her on his hand. Another groan passed her lips as she watched what he did. He pulled his hand from within her, replacing his fingers with his tongue as he continued to lap at her. Her taste was in his mouth and it only served to heighten the way he was feeling. His cock was so erect it was almost painful now. Her hand pushed his head closer to her, encouraging him to continue his current mission. When he was engaged once more on his task, she moved her hand and took his wrist in its hold. His interest was piqued as she pulled her arm back up her body, taking his hand with it. Maintaining his focus on tonguing her, he raised his eyes to look at what she was doing. He almost came there and then when he saw and felt her take his fingers into her mouth, sucking his fingertips and tasting herself on them.

Lee knew it wouldn't be long before he'd have to take her. There was only so much he could cope with before he'd have to give in and it had been a while; for him at least. The sight of her sucking on his fingers had turned him on even more than he was already. Just as he began to think he couldn't last much longer, he felt Kara reaching the edge of her peak. He pulled away from her, a look of concern flashing over her face as he pulled his hand from her mouth. He sat up, continuing to look her up and down as he took himself in hand, stroking it briefly; coating it with the mixture of her juices and saliva still on it. He moved so he was positioned at her entrance. Her eyes were sparkling as he saw her looking to where the two of them now met and there was a small smile on her face. Oh so slowly he pushed himself into her, nearly groaning when her body squeezed him tightly as he began to edge his way in. His hands moved to her hips, clutching them in their grasp as he strained to move slowly; drawing out the moment for both of them to enjoy. Her body stretched to let him into her and she sighed as it admitted him into its depths. He stopped moving once he was buried in her, taking a minute to allow both of them to get used to the intensity flaring between them. This was the hottest it had ever been for both of them. He was still sitting up, looking down at her lying on the bed, her golden hair splayed across the pillow. She looked like an angel and his heart beat faster as the emotions he felt for her ebbed through him.

Her arms moved up to take hold of the board above her head in a vice-like grip. It was Kara that began the movement they both so desired, rotating her hips slightly so his cock moved fractionally within her. He took that as the sign she wanted him to move so he set a steady pace, moving in and out of her slowly and steadily. His grip on her hips tightened as his movements began to increase in speed. She strained her arms as her hold on the shelf strengthened. She groaned loudly as his shaft stroked her exactly where she was desperate for him to touch her. She could hear him breathing deeply, struggling to get enough oxygen into his lungs. His movements slowed slightly and she moved her hips repeatedly against him, trying to force him to speed up again. He leant forward and kissed her on the lips, releasing his hold on her hips and taking the weight onto his arms near her shoulders. The slight change of angle caused him to press against her clit as he moved in and out of her, the final touch which caused her to cry out in release. His movements slowed somewhat but didn't cease until her peak ended.

Kara opened her eyes and saw him staring at her intently. She almost came again at the burn of his eyes as they locked on hers. He was still encased in her body, cock hard in her. He hadn't reached his release but seemed to be happy for her to be ready for more before he started again. She pushed at his shoulder softly with her hand and tried to sit up. He slipped from her body as she moved and she couldn't help but notice the look of disappoint on his face. She kissed him softly, flicking her tongue against his. Still she pushed again at his shoulder and he eventually moved further down the bed. She watched as he sat there, confusion sweeping over his features. She crawled forward, edging closer to him with each movement, then took his cock in her hand, stroking it firmly; causing a shiver to run through him. Once he was fully erect in her palm, she released her hold on him. She turned her back to him, moving once again onto her hands and knees. She looked at him over her shoulder and smiled at him before wiggling her bum as an invitation to him. His hand instinctively reached forward to touch a cheek of her rear; stroking the soft skin with his thumb. She parted her legs further, again shaking her bum; trying to entice him to make the next move. She was desperate for him to be back in her.

Lee looked at her and saw one of the most erotic sights before him. His cock throbbed as she moved again in front of him. She'd lowered the top half of her body, all of her weight focused on her forearms and knees. He took a couple of deep breaths, trying to control the desire flowing through his body. His hand moved to his cock which was standing hard and proud; jutting from his body. He moved closer to her, again holding himself against her entrance. She could feel him moving behind her; the mattress shifting as he moved and then felt the tip of his cock pressed against her. Her pulse was racing and she was excited beyond all expectations. Not being able to see him directly was only adding to the anticipation. He slid into her smoothly and then leaned forward, pressing himself against her back. The angle he had within her pressed his length repeatedly against her g-spot and despite the lack of possible movement because of their positioning, there was little need for either of them to actually do much. One of his hands touched a breast, tweaking its nipple between a finger and thumb causing her to gasp. He kissed the back of her shoulder and her neck as they moved together. His hand then moved further down until it reached her clit. She strained her neck, trying to look at him over her shoulder but not able to get a clear view of him. Instead she looked down and saw his fingers moving towards her clit. Softly a finger was traced across it, causing her breath to falter and her movements to cease. She closed her eyes briefly, needing a moment to try and regain some equilibrium. That was shattered as he stroked her more forcefully. It felt so good; the combination of him moving within her, hitting just the right spot and his fingers on her clit caused the tightening spiral of desire to explode through her. He paused what he was doing with a restraint she'd never imagined even he could possess. She wanted him to come in her. She needed him to feel the moment of perfection he was always desperate to give her while he was buried deep in her.

As her peak was ebbing, she knew she needed him to lose complete control, like he'd started to earlier when she'd had him in her mouth. It was going to be difficult for her to get him to give in to his baser emotions though. She'd only seen it happen twice before; the first time was after she'd slept with Baltar, then he'd hit her back after she'd hit him. The second time had been on New Caprica and it had truly scared her more than she thought it ever would. Now though she wanted to see him like that; she was ready to see him that way again. More importantly she needed to see him that way; to know she could make him be his true self. Again she moved away from him and this time she definitely didn't fail to notice the sigh that slipped from his mouth as he again lost his connection with her. She glanced at the time and knew it wouldn't be long until pilots began to come back to quarters. She moved once more from within the bunk and pulled him with her. She dragged the curtain back so the bunk was exposed to the room once more. She looked at him intently and then kissed him on the lips. She closed her eyes and whispered against his mouth. "Let go, Lee. Lose control. I'll be okay. I won't break." With that she turned to face the bunk and draped herself over the edge; resting the top half of her body on the mattress, exposing herself once more to him.

The sight of her before him once more took his breath away. "Gods, Kara." He traced his hand down her spine, causing her to shiver slightly and that was all the encouragement he needed for him to push himself back into her, enjoying the tightness around his cock as he moved into her. He was able to move much more this time. He took hold of her hips again as his groin met hers, pausing before he did just as she asked. Her hands found his, covering them as they rested on her hips. Their fingers laced with each others and he found the moment intoxicating. He gripped her hips tighter as he began to move, building up to the same speed as earlier when she'd been gripping the shelf above her bunk.

"Harder, Lee. Let go of everything. I've got you, everything will be okay." She was almost begging him and her desire for him to do as she asked increased each time he pushed into her. At her words, his speed increased and she swallowed quickly, licking her lips. He was going to do it, she knew he would. His groin slapped against her skin each time he pushed back into her body and she groaned as he managed to somehow hit her deeper than before. He was plunging in and out of her body now with a ferocity that would have scared her if it had been anyone else. As it was Lee, it only excited her more than she had ever imagined it would. She could feel the telltale signs of another orgasm rapidly approaching and hoped she could hold it off long enough for him to get there as well. "Kara Thrace loves Lee Adama," she murmured over and over. She was soon groaning, changing her words to "Lee… Lee… Leeeeeeee," as she couldn't hold off the moment any longer.

As her orgasm struck, Lee finally reached the same point and he moaned loudly as he pushed into her one final time, feeling his cock pulse within her. It had been amazing to be able to let go like that. For the first time in such a long time he'd been able to be himself and he knew he could only ever be that way with her; with Kara; with his one true love. His hand moved from her hip, once more touching her clit, determined to draw out her peak as long as he could. Her hand followed his, covering it and pressing their fingers against the tiny nub. He began to rock against her once more, slowly pushing in and out of her as he kissed her on the back of her neck. Kara was drained from the sensations flowing through her. She felt a little tender as he still moved within her, but could put up with the small discomfort if it meant the continued closeness to Lee. Her desire rose once more as she heard him growl softly against her ear. He was close again and as he pushed headlong over the edge, he took her with him. Their fingers moved further back, both of them feeling where he was entering her body. He pulled her up from where she lay so her back was now pressed against his front. He lowered both of them to a more comfortable sitting position and kissed her softly on the shoulder and neck as the feelings slowed once more. Her hair was sweaty against his face, but he didn't care in the slightest. If it was at all possible; he loved her more now than he ever had previously. He was a fool to think he could ever let this go; that he could let her go. He slipped from her body one final time and took a moment to appreciate the loss. He lifted her into his arms, finding her fighting sleep as he climbed to his feet and laid them both on her bunk. There was a blanket at the bottom of her bunk which he pulled to cover them both, closing the curtain once more to remove the harsh light from where they lay. He also turned off the light before also losing his battle to stay awake.

TBC


	10. Chapter 3 part 4

**A/N:** Thanks for all the kind reviews... I hope you enjoy this part as much. It's the last part of chapter 3. Next time - chapter 4.

**Chapter 3: Trapped.**

**Part 4.**

Lee was back sitting in a Raptor, going down once more to the surface of the planet. He was again sitting in the co-pilot's seat but this time it wasn't Kara flying the craft. Racetrack was flying the vessel and for once she wasn't keeping up a steady stream of conversation. It gave Lee some time to reflect on the past day. Both meetings he'd had to attend had been very useful and had the benefit of getting him away from the planet and his wife for a short period of time. The biggest plus-side about having to return to Galactica though had been getting to spend a large amount of time with Kara. The sex had been fantastic, the best ever but it wasn't just that time he'd relished. It was the other moments they'd shared as well which stayed now in his memories. What she'd done for him in the shower and after in her bunk had been more important to their relationship than the sex they'd shared. Waking with her in his arms this morning had been a whole new experience for Lee. He was so used to just sharing stolen moments with her and to have her in his arms the next morning was something he'd never thought he'd get to do. Even the night when Kara had broken down during the trips with the Fleet through the star cluster he'd woken up alone as she'd left their bed early to go and speak to Kat. He'd been bothered by it at the time, but looking back at it now he could see why she'd needed to go and see her. It was his dismay and confusion at her absence that morning that led to him not noticing how ill Kat was before that last trip. So to finally wake up and find her there, nestled in his arms was something he wished he'd been able to cherish longer. Of course, no sooner had he woken up other pilots had begun to move around the room; making enough noise to rouse her as she lay there.

He'd initially been disappointed as she moved and her eyes fluttered open. She looked at him, staring into his eyes. Her hand reached up and turned the light on within the bunk, enabling him to see her beauty as she stared at him. They were in no rush to get up and leave the haven they'd secluded themselves in. It was over an hour before either of them needed to make a move. As she moved to kiss him, softly caressing his mouth with hers, all sorrow ebbed from his body.

He fidgeted as he sat in the co-pilot's seat, remembering the slowness and passion of their lovemaking as they lay there. Despite the enforced silence and the need to keep a certain amount of secrecy to their actions, they'd maintained a level of fervor which did little to take away from the intensity of the moment. Her leg was wrapped around his hip, pulling him as close to her as he could get. The key element to the overwhelming depth of emotions they shared was the constant eye contact they held. His eyes never left hers as he stared into the stormy pools before him. They'd both known it was going to be a while before they were able to do this again and both wanted… needed… to ensure they kept a memory of just how good it could be.

Lee felt almost aroused as the heat of the memories caused his blood to pool in his groin. He fought down the emotions as much as he could and by the time the Raptor came into land, he'd almost managed to achieve his goal. He walked from the Raptor into the intense heat that met him as he left the ship. He undid his jacket and removed it from his body, wishing he'd been able to wear something other than his dress uniform back down here. Unfortunately after his meeting with Laura and his father there hadn't been time for him to do anything other than collect his things from his quarters and race to the flight deck. He hadn't even been able to see Kara after the meeting and he was missing her greatly already. He looked up and took a deep breath as he saw his wife waiting for him in the distance. He fought down his disdain at seeing her but continued to walk towards her, trying to school his thoughts so he wouldn't reveal anything to her.

As he got closer he thought he saw a knowing look wash over her face and he immediately felt guilt flash through him. She didn't deserve to be treated this way. She deserved much better; more than he was able to give and more than he wanted to. If he was any kind of man he'd end it with her now. Put an end to their shared misery because there was no way she could be happy with the current state of their marriage, surely. She forced a smile to her face which only managed to turn Lee's stomach as he stood before her. It was simpering; she may have felt sincere as she fluttered her eyes at him, but it just made him feel nauseous.

"Did you enjoy your time back on Galactica?"

He doubted she wanted to know how much he'd enjoyed his time away from her but kept that to himself. "It was okay. Things are a little unsettled up there. How were things down here?" He tried to keep a certain level of professionalism to his tone, hoping to distract her from the overt hope he could see in her eyes. Her hand touched his arm and it was all he could do not to wince as he felt her fingers on his bicep.

"We missed you. I missed you. I'm glad to have my husband back with me." She took his hand in hers. "Maybe we can catch up and spend some time together later," she whispered.

Bile rose up his throat at her words and he instinctively swallowed. "I've got things I need to do, Dee." He stepped away from her, shaking her hold from his arm and hand. "I'll see you later, if I get a chance." He couldn't look at her, knowing the rejection that would be evident on her face. He walked determinedly towards the command tent, knowing he needed to keep some distance between himself and his wife for as long as he could.

****

Three days had passed and the algae collection mission was beginning to wind up. They were probably only going to be on the planet for a couple more days and for Lee getting back to Galactica couldn't come soon enough. He hadn't seen Kara since before his meeting with his dad and the president and his temper was close to breaking point. The guilt he'd been fighting for so long had increased to the point where he couldn't hide from it any more. He knew the next time he saw her they'd have to talk about where they stood and what they were going to do. It was pretty much all he'd been able to think about in his spare time since he'd last seen her. He was finally able to admit, to himself anyway, that he needed to resolve the situation. He just hoped she wanted the same thing he did.

Both he and Dee were still participating in their previous dance, avoiding the ever-growing conflict between the two of them. She had been throwing looks of disdain his way whenever they'd been in the same room and that was something he'd determinedly tried to avoid.

He was currently in the command tent, boxing up the reports and maps they'd used while stationed on the planet. Unfortunately, given the lack of her having anything else to do Dee was assisting him in the task. They weren't talking and Lee was trying as much as he could to pretend she wasn't there.

There was the loud noise of a rapidly approaching Raptor entering the atmosphere. Lee rolled his eyes, muttering "Who the hell is that?"

He hadn't been expecting a response but Dee did answer him. "Starbuck, I guess. Third time this week. It's amazing how she keeps landing on the top of the pilot rotation." He noticed her pointed look at him as she tried to gauge his reaction to her comment.

He realized she was right, it probably was Kara. "Well, uh, donut runs are assigned off a coin flip. Kara probably thinks she's running a stream of bad luck. You know, I should probably get over there." There was an edge of hope to his voice that he hoped she didn't notice. He prayed to Gods he wasn't sure he really believed in that she wouldn't follow him.

The Gods answered his prayers. "I'm gonna skip the meet and greet this time, if you don't mind…"

He placed the file he'd been holding back on the table, trying not to look too eager to leave and go to Kara. "Sure." Lee walked from the tent and Dee followed him with her eyes, knowing with a heavy heart that she'd just given them the perfect opportunity to be together and annoyed with herself for doing so.

Lee jogged the short distance through the undergrowth to the Raptor. The hatch was already open, so he clambered up the wing and entered the craft. He didn't look at her as he walked in and looked at the consoles where the ECO usually sat. "You brought her in little hot, don't you think?"

There was an amused tone to her voice as she answered him. "Yeah, well, had I known I was being graded I'd have thrown in a couple of barrel rolls." They stared at each other intently, the passion already building between them. Then Lee was kissing her and for a moment she forgot everything other than the feel of his lips on hers. He began to help her remove the top half of her flight suit. Their kisses were short but passionate and she pulled her mouth from his, smiling as she teased him, "Remind me to thank the CAG for sticking me on these crank donut runs, huh?" Her tone was teasing, but her words were serious. They kissed again and she started to wrap her arms around his neck as this kiss deepened and became more intense. She grinned as the kiss ended; pleased she was back in his arms.

"This is insane, you know." His words highlighted the guilt he was feeling at the situation they were in.

Her smirk grew and she moved to kiss him again. "That's just the way I like it." She felt guilty about everything as well, but cheating on her husband was something everyone already expected her to do, so her guilt bothered her much less. That's what she kept trying to convince herself of anyway. She managed to delay the inevitable conversation she knew was coming by kissing him again with as much passion as she could.

Lee's hands came to her face, cupping her cheeks as he broke the kiss. "I can barely look Dee in the eye. I've got to do something." There was a sense of urgency to his voice.

She was almost relieved that finally he was feeling guilty for the right reasons. All this time she'd known Lee was a better person than how he'd been acting but it wasn't what she wanted to hear from him at all. She wanted things to be the way they were the last time they'd been together. Kara frowned as his words finally filtered into her brain, realizing he was pushing to have the conversation despite her attempted methods of distraction; methods that usually worked but not this time. She nodded, knowing what he was saying was the truth. "Okay, like what?"

Their mouths were barely apart from each other and both were fighting (and losing) the battle to kiss each other. Again their mouth's met, tongues pushing against the others. "I don't know… like divorce." He kissed her again, hoping to convince her it was a good idea with this one kiss.

She pulled her mouth from his as his words made their way through her lust-filled brain. "Mmm… no. Nuh huh." Suddenly the kissing stopped and they were staring at each other intently, each trying to measure how serious the other person was. She shook her head at him, trying to get across her distaste for what he'd suggested.

He was stunned she wasn't agreeing with him. He'd run through many different scenarios in his head over the last few days; trying to imagine how this would go, and in every single one this wasn't how he'd thought this conversation would go. After his time back on Galactica, he'd thought they were on the same page; he thought she'd be agreeing with him. How could he have been so wrong? "Well, come on. Let's get real here. You said yourself thing's were bad. Your marriage was failing." He was trying to convince her with his words, trying to get through to her this was a good idea.

The smile had fallen from her face as she realized this was it; the beginning of the end. She knew him as well as he did her and she knew he wouldn't like what she was about to suggest. This realization saddened her immensely but it didn't make her change what she was going to say. "Yeah, but marriage is a sacrament. It's not a Pyramid game. You don't… you don't get do overs, Lee. I made a vow in the sight of the Gods and I'm not going to break that." How could he not realize she would feel this way? How could he not understand how important her religion was to her? Maybe they didn't know each other as well as they'd thought.

He frowned at her words. His eyes had lowered as she'd spoken but rose to look at hers as he answered her, "You're breaking it every time we do this." He kissed her again; this kiss filled more with sorrow than passion; tinged with a hint of goodbye. "Every time." Another kiss and more guilt. He didn't think she was taking this seriously.

She smirked at him, trying one last time to persuade him things could stay the same. "Divorce is different. This is just bending the rules." She kissed him this time, silently begging him to drop the subject and let things continue the way they'd been.

Lee tore his lips from her, backing away to put some distance between the two of them. Knowing space between them would be the only way he'd be able to resist kissing her again. "No. No. I'm sorry. I can't… I can't… I can't live like this." His voice was shaking. He'd been so wrong. They were never going to be able to agree on this subject, he could see that now. "Every time I look at my wife, I see my own guilt reflected in her eyes."

Kara looked at him, sitting awkwardly, resolutely not looking at her. "Wow, wow, Lee. That is really poetic of you but you don't need to make that big a deal out of this." It was a lie and they both knew it.

"Well it is a big deal, Kara. It is. It is." Even to his own ears, his voice sounded desperate.

She could see neither of them was going to change their minds, however much they went back and forth about it. "Great. So I won't divorce and you won't cheat. So where does that leave us?"

Her question hung in the air for several seconds. It was the moment. The moment everything was going to change between them and not for the better. Lee was struggling to breathe, and for Kara it seemed to be the same. The tension in the ship had heightened to the point where it was almost painful for them to remain there.

Lee tried to find a word that summed up everything and it took him a while to find it but eventually he did. He looked at her, pain etched on his face. "Trapped." They stared at each other, the word reverberating around the Raptor. Lee was sure they'd have continued the conversation back and forth between them much longer if a hail from Galactica hadn't been received, relieving some of the pressure that had built in the small ship.

It was his father and the president on the line. After ascertaining it was just the two of them present, Bill Adama briefed them on the situation. "Four Cylon Basestars jumped into the upper atmosphere a while ago. The Fleet's jumped away. A delegation from one of the Basestars just came over to Galactica and met with the president and myself." He paused; Lee and Kara looked at each other, concern on both their faces; their previous discussion momentarily forgotten. "Gaius Baltar was with them."

It was Kara that spoke first. "What did they want?"

Laura spoke. "The Eye of Jupiter. They think we've found it and are in the process of retrieving it and bringing it back to the Fleet." She took a deep breath. "We need you to find it, Lee. Fast."

"Well it would help if I knew what I was looking for. Does it really look like an eye?" Lee looked at Kara, bewildered expressions on both their faces.

"I don't know, Lee. I've looked at the scriptures and they make reference to the Eye being left in some sort of temple but there's no physical description." She sounded defeated, even over the comm.

His father spoke again. "All we know for certain is that it supposedly points the way to Earth."

Skepticism was obvious in Lee's voice as he asked him the first thing that came to mind. "And you believe that?"

Bill was quick to reply, having anticipated Lee would ask this. "The Cylons do. I can't take a chance that they're right. If it looks like they're going to get into the temple, your order is to blow it."

Silence was the only thing that could be heard from either end of the line before Lee once again spoke. "Understood. What's my time…?" There was a loud screeching sound and the line went dead. "What's going on?" he asked Kara.

She pressed a few buttons, looking at the readings on the console in front of them both. "The Cylon's are jamming the wireless. Every frequency."

They looked at each other, realizing the enormity of their situation. It was Lee that spoke first, "Okay. We need to establish our communications. Work out a plan to defend this temple while Tyrol searches."

"Defend it with what? A dozen marines, maybe five more military?" She knew it would be difficult for them to achieve, but did Lee?

"We're going to have to draft the civilians." Even he didn't sound convinced he was suggesting the right idea.

It was time for some out-of-the-box thinking and Kara was quick to do just that. "Can I make a suggestion that you won't like?"

"Do you make any other kind?" His response was a pointed comment to their earlier discussion.

She knew he was going to hate this but said it anyway. "Use Sam to command the civilians."

"You're not serious?" It was pointless to ask her because he knew she was. 'Well, this is going to be fun,' he thought.

****

Sam walked into the tent to find the two of them waiting for him there. "Lee."

"Hey Sam." Lee tried to keep his tone light and walked away from the pair of them, having already agreed with Kara it might be best if she broached the subject.

The husband and wife were standing close together and she smiled at him, wondering if he'd forgotten about their argument. "Hi."

Sam looked at his wife as he poured himself some water from a canister. "Heard you were coming down. Guess it takes an emergency to get us in the same room these days."

Apparently he hadn't then. Kara rose from where she'd been sitting; flashing a look at Lee that suggested he maybe gave this a try. "Can we do this later please?"

Lee had heard their conversation and seen her face as she looked at him. He sighed, knowing he was letting himself in for a heap load of trouble. "Sam, I need you to command the civilians, form them into fire teams. I'll give my deployment orders through Sergeant…"

"Woah, woah, woah, woah. Deployment orders? Fire teams? Come on, some of these guys have never held a rifle before."

It wasn't the best start but had been the response Lee was expecting. His tone turned to mocking without even trying as he spoke again. "Well you're supposed to be the expert in turning civilians into soldiers." He just couldn't help the small dig at the man who'd had the audacity to marry the woman he loved.

"Oh, no, no. We were guerrilla fighters. Right, hit and run. Keep moving, keep the enemy off balance. I've never had to defend a fixed position. That's a whole different game."

Maybe just ordering him to do it would work… "Then you're just going to have to learn it fast because that's what we're doing. We're defending this fixed position until the Chief finds his Eye of Jupiter."

Incredulity was in Sam's voice as he reacted angrily to what Lee had said. "Okay, so you want us to risk our lives for something you haven't even found yet?"

Lee moved nearer to him, trying to remain reasonable. "Listen Sam, I'm not even sure it exists. But I don't have to tell you every little Gods damn detail."

Sam started to get in Lee's face; the antagonism between the two men had been increasing each time they spoke. Suddenly the discussion was about much more than their current situation. "No, you know what you have to explain to me…?"

"Hey, hey, hey." Kara forced herself between the two as they squared up to each other. She was facing Sam and it was to him she spoke. "The Major's in charge on this one, okay?"

He sneered at her. "Oh, well I certainly wouldn't want to step between you and your Major." He turned and strode out of the tent, followed closely by the rest of his team.

Lee couldn't help the sarcasm that crept into his voice as both he and Kara watched him leave. "Well, I thought that went really well."

Kara was sure she was right when she said, "He'll do it."

"He'd better." Kara couldn't help thinking it sounded like a threat.

TBC

**A/N2:** Now I know this is a definite step back for both of them after the previous part - but I did say I was going to follow canon... Please bear with me.


	11. Chapter 4

**A/N:** A one-part chapter here - relating to the episode Rapture. Hopefully this will go some way to appeasing those of you who were disappointed with Kara and Lee's discussion in the last chapter.

Please review.

**Chapter 4: Boxed in.**

Things were spiraling every which way and Lee was trying to retain some semblance of control over a rapidly escalating frakked up mess he was supposed to be in charge of. The main thing on his mind was the fact Kara's Raptor had been shot down and he had no idea if she was okay. Their earlier discussion regarding their relationship, one that didn't even really exist anymore; was still playing on his mind and he wished more than anything they'd been able to resolve things before she'd left.

Sam strode over to him, worry seeping from every pore. "What do you mean she's gone down? Gone down where?"

He tried to remain focused even if it was the last thing he really felt. "Somewhere in the north valley." Moving his focus to the Sergeant in the room. "Okay, get your men on the line. Full ammo launch. They're coming from the north."

Sam interrupted him. "Woah, woah, woah. We're going to set up a rescue party right?"

Lee felt guilty but was determined to stay detached from the crisis; something he was finding increasingly difficult. "Er, no. We don't have the manpower. We have to defend the position." He went back to looking at a map of the area pushing down the guilt he was fighting with all his might.

"Lee, she could be dying out there."

'And I don't know that?' he wanted to shout at the man before him, but he didn't. "Yeah, I know that, Sam. I know but we are thin on the ground here and the Cylons are on the march. We can't help her. We have to hold our positions."

"Are you out of your frakking mind?" Sam couldn't believe what he was hearing. He was sure his one ally in this would be Lee. After all, Lee supposedly loved Kara just as much as he did, right? Lee ignored him and Sam began to wonder how long he was going to be able to do that for.

The sergeant behind him spoke up. "The Major's right. We don't have any troops to spare if we're gonna hold this position."

This was too much! "Screw this position. Listen we can take those hills. Use guerrilla tactics. That's what I've been talking about this whole time."

He was determined he wouldn't let his father or the president down. They were going to do as they'd been told, however much his heart was telling him to do something entirely different. "No. That is not our mission. We have our orders. We're stronger here than…"

"What are you, some Gods damn wind up tin soldier? This is my wife we're talking about."

His last comment was too much for Lee to hear; especially given everything with Kara earlier. "Yeah, I know who she is." He was shouting now, his fraying emotions finally pushed to the limit, "And I have known her and cared about her a hell of a lot longer than you." He could hardly breathe as the emotions warred within him. He needed Kara back; he wished she was here; he wished he could hold her in his arms; even if it was just one more time.

Sam was being just as belligerent and this time there was no Kara to step between the two of them to diffuse it. "Just you do whatever the frak you want. I am going after my wife."

"I can't let you do that Sam." A huge part of him was almost willing Sam to go and do as he said.

"I'm not asking you for permission."

"Sergeant Matthias…" The sergeant pulls her weapon at Lee's request and aims it point blank at Sam.

"Are you kidding me? Are you going to shoot me now?"

"I can't let you go. I need you on the line. I need you commanding those civilians. I'm sorry Sam but you cannot go." He hated saying it but he knew it was the truth.

"Well, I'm sorry too, Major but you can't stop me." They'd reached a standoff and Sam was quick to realize he was on the losing side. "If Kara dies out there, I swear to God I will kill you myself."

Lee knew Sam didn't realize how close to winning he truly was; he'd all but won Kara. Lee was heartbroken and knew he wouldn't want to survive if she was dead. "If she's dies out there, I'll let you." There was a hint of resignation to his voice as he spoke and he was sure Sam picked it up.

Sam stared at Lee's back as everyone else in the room watched the two of them. The Sergeant was still pointing her gun at him. "So what are you going to do now? Follow me around with a gun because that is the only way that I am not going after Kara."

Lee instincts were screaming at him that Sam was right. He would have to do something really good to convince Sam to stay here. He was going to have to send someone to get Kara. There seemed to be only one logical solution but he felt awful even thinking about suggesting it. "Private Sykes, get Lieutenant Dualla on the line."

"Yes sir." The private did as requested and passed the handset to him.

"I'm here." She sounded too eager and Lee could only wonder just what she thought he was about to say.

"Do you have eyeballs on Starbuck's position?"

"Negative. No visual on her Raptor but I can see smoke from the crash site. She went down behind a hill. It's a couple of klicks away." Again she sounded as if she barely cared about what had happened to the person they were talking about. She must have known he would be upset by what she was telling him and Lee had to wonder if his wife even cared about him.

"Can you get to the Raptor?" He tried to keep the desperation out of his voice and he could feel Sam staring at him adding to the pressure he was feeling.

"I don't know. It's pretty far away. There's minimal cover."

She obviously didn't want to do it and Lee wasn't sure he could blame her. He was pretty much asking her to go on a suicide mission. But such was his desperation he made himself ask, "Is it doable?"

"I don't know." She paused as she realized what he was asking her to do. She still had to check; stunned he would ask her to do this. Did he care for her that little or was it that he cared for HER more? "You want me… you want me to rescue Captain Thrace?"

Guilt reverberated around his body as he gave the order. "Attempt the rescue."

"Yes sir." She closed the line as soon as she could.

****

Kara tried to remove the gloves from her burnt hands but was unable to pull them off without ripping loads of her hands away with them. The pain was intense. She hated this planet. Nothing about this planet was right. She was also beginning to feel the ramifications of the conversation with Lee. She was devastated by it all; losing Lee was the last thing she wanted. And yet she couldn't see a way of getting passed the barriers they'd discussed. Now she had to deal with having crashed on this Gods forsaken planet and she could only imagine how Lee would be feeling about the fact she'd crashed again. What was it with her and planets anyway? Every time she came to a planet for any length of time she ended up running into Cylons. She was at the point where she could only imagine her special destiny was to have a huge great flashing target above her head for the Cylons to aim at. She remembered how almost two years ago now, Bill Adama had told her about how Lee had been when she'd crashed on the surface of the moon after taking on the Cylons on her own and she knew Lee would be feeling the same way again now; possibly even worse given what had been going on between the two of them recently. She wished she could speak to him now and reassure him she was okay. Gods her hands were hurting. It was a lot worse than when she'd frakked up her knee during that crash. She shifted in her seat and her knee throbbed as well forcing her to realize she must have bashed it up again during the crash. Frakking great! Maybe telling him she was okay would be a slight exaggeration then. To hear Lee's voice now would be fantastic though. She gingerly took the med kit from her bag, desperately trying to not cause herself anymore pain than she had to; her hands were shaking from the exertion as she opened the lid. A loud bang outside the Raptor startled her, causing her to drop the kit on the other seat, throwing its contents everywhere. She grabbed her weapon from her waist and pointed it at the open entrance, wincing in pain as the cold metal of the gun pressed against her mangled flesh.

"Starbuck? Starbuck?" It was Dee.

Kara wasn't sure if she counted as friend or foe but decided it was marginally better than a Cylon turning up. "Dee, why didn't you sing out? I almost blew you away." She was physically shaking as the pain overwhelmed her totally.

"Glad to see you too." Dee said begrudgingly as she climbed into the Raptor and walked over to Kara. She could see she was injured and took one of her hands in hers, trying to ascertain what she should do to help her. "Okay, okay." She grabbed a needle and injected Morpha from the dropped med kit into her thigh refusing to try and be gentle about it either.

Kara suddenly realized why Dee was there, and it gave her a little hope that maybe things would be okay; that things weren't as completely frakked as she'd thought. "Lee sent you."

"Yeah." There's a hard tone to her voice. "My husband ordered me to risk my life for yours." She let Kara absorb her words before continuing. "That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to bring Starbuck back to Apollo." She tried not to sound too bitter when she said it, although it was how she felt. She'd never realized a little over two years ago that she would grow to hate her life as much as she did at the moment. If she knew then what she did now, maybe she'd have made a different decision. She wished she had.

****

Lee hadn't heard anything from Dee since he'd given her the order to rescue Kara and all his mind could concentrate on was whether she'd managed to get to Kara's stricken Raptor. They were busy preparing for the approaching Cylon's; even Sam was knuckling down to co-ordinating the civilian element of their people. Lee knew he was probably just as worried about her as he was and Sam at least had every right to be so. Somehow it felt wrong for Lee to feel that way – although he'd known Kara for a fair proportion of his life. She was part of his family and always would be. Whatever happened between them. Despite everything that had been said earlier; Lee loved her and he knew he probably always would.

More than anything now Lee wished he could take back what had happened earlier. Why had he forced the situation? Maybe if he hadn't done that things would be different to how they were now. Lee shook his head; trying to regain his concentration on what he was trying to do. It didn't work; his thoughts just wouldn't stray from the woman he loved; much as he tried to. If he wasn't careful he would get himself shot by the Cylons. 'Would that be a bad thing?' he thought quickly, 'because living without Kara isn't something I want to learn to deal with.'

****

Some time had passed and Dee had managed to check how things were; to ascertain how and if they could get off this planet. "The ships structurally intact." She informed the drugged Captain in the pilot's chair.

"Okay. That means that the only thing keeping us grounded is a busted flyby wire, so you've got to bypass those bundles with data cord from the comm. system and then we… we may have a shot of getting out of here." The pain was getting really bad again and Dee must have heard the pain in her voice as she gave her another injection of Morpha without any prompting.

Dee spoke to the woman next to her as she let the drug take effect; bitterness barely hidden in her voice. "There's only one left. Why don't we save it for when you fly us out of here?"

Kara was no fool; she knew there was no way she would be flying them off this planet. She'd be stupid to even try. "I can't fly. Especially all whacked up on Morpha."

The thought had obviously never even occurred to Dee and Kara could see the obvious thought process rapidly going through her head. She wasn't surprised to hear the beginning of panic edging into her voice when she finally spoke again. "Well that's just frakking great."

Kara looked at her. She could tell Dee was worried and she wanted to make her feel better. She wanted her to feel good because she'd already realized it was going to have to be Dee that would fly them out of here, and she knew she'd never had any flying experience before. A nervy pilot would be tantamount to disaster in this situation. It was because of all this that she said the first thing that came to mind; which of course was about Lee. He was constantly in her thoughts. "He won't cheat. He's too honorable." Okay, so it was probably the wrong thing to say. Kara realized that immediately; as soon as she heard the words leave her mouth.

"Unlike you." Her voice was barbed and it caused Kara to blink and stare at her.

"Yeah, unlike me." The Morpha was beginning to kick in and she could feel its affects flowing through her body. It definitely took the edge off everything. In fact, things were becoming a little fuzzy; she felt a euphoric sense of loss of control. Kara smiled softly as she spoke, "I love Sam. I hate Sam. And I love Lee and I hate Lee." She realized something as she spoke and it made perfect sense to her, "Gods I have to cheat just to keep all the pieces neat." It was obviously too much for Dee to hear as she slapped Kara soundly across the cheek.

When she spoke, her tone was completely professional but Kara knew her emotions were bubbling just under the surface. "Stay with it. You've still got to walk me through these avionics."

****

Lee and Sam climbed down from the Raptor, hauling the body bag containing Baltar's unconscious weight in their arms onto a gurney. As they both stood watching the Chief and his men move him off the flight deck towards the brig, there was a shared sense of camaraderie between the two men. At that moment Lee allowed himself to think about Kara and his wife. They'd heard over the comm. link they were also en route back to Galactica, having managed to leave the planet before it was too late but Lee hadn't really had time to process that information until now.

Sam noticed Kara limping across the deck first and he moved quickly to where she stood, taking her in his arms. Lee stood there, watching the two of them standing wrapped around each other and it was as if he was back on New Caprica the morning after the ground-breaking ceremony. Seeing Kara standing in Sam's arms inspired the same feelings he'd felt when his father had told him they'd got married that morning. An overwhelming sadness punched his body and his step faltered momentarily.

Then he saw his wife and he strode past Sam and Kara to take her in his arms. He wasn't sure if the hug he swept her into was because he was grateful she'd rescued Kara or because he was pleased she was okay but as Kara and him shared a glance over their respective spouses' shoulders he realized he didn't care which it was. Maybe just a small part of it was that he hoped Kara would feel as bad as he did when he looked at the two of them. His relationship with Kara was teetering on the edge of a knife and he knew it wouldn't be long before they continued their previous discussion and made the final decision as to what they were going to do. The look on her face told him she felt as bad as he did and that somehow made him feel a little better.

****

Lee hadn't seen Kara for a couple of hours since they'd returned from the planet. Things had been hectic as the Fleet had regrouped after the run in with the Cylons. Despite everything he needed to know she was okay. He'd seen her hands swathed in bandages as she stood on the flight deck and he wanted to know she was going to be okay. He tried to convince himself it was purely professional as he walked down the corridor from Sickbay having discovered she'd been released about an hour earlier. Tried to make himself believe he only wanted to make sure his best pilot would be back on the flight roster some time in the near future. Of course that was rubbish. He wanted to take her in his arms and reassure himself everything was fine between them; that things weren't completely frakked up.

He slowly approached the pilots' quarters, wondering if her husband would be there. He found he didn't care if he was. He had a purely legitimate justification for explaining his reason for visiting her if he was. He took a deep breath and pushed open the hatch to the room as quietly as he could and found the room bereft of any pilots other than the one he was interested in, for which he was extremely grateful. She was lying on her bunk and appeared to be asleep. He looked at her as she lay there and saw her hands were wrapped in bandages; a flash of pain flooded his body as he realized how serious her injuries seemed to be. Then he remembered how bad it could have been and he moved closer to her, casting a shadow over her as he got nearer. He crouched beside her bunk and ran a hand across her cheek.

She murmured, without even opening her eyes. "Lee…" Her eyes opened and her hazel met his blue, deep emotions swirling in both.

"Are you okay?" His voice was quiet, as if he was afraid to speak any louder in case it broke the stalemate they were currently standing at.

"I'll be fine."

"I was so worried about you." His gaze moved to her hands, he wanted to take them in his and ensure himself she was okay but didn't want to hurt her any further. "Will they be okay?" His voice was barely a whisper as he stared at her.

"Cottle says they will. It's just going to take time for them to heal."

His fingers softly touched the bandages on one hand and she watched him through tired eyes. "Do they hurt?"

"Not as much now. Cottle's given me some pretty strong drugs."

His eyes moved to her face, closely followed by his hand which again caressed her face. "I'm sorry."

She reached out to him and he pulled her into his arms, the emotions he'd been feeling earlier forcing him to act on them at last. Her arms were around his neck and the feel of her in his arms was better than any medicine he could have asked for. It was working for her just as well. She whispered against his neck, as emotional as he was, "I thought I was never going to get a chance to apologize for everything."

"I know. Me too." They stayed that way for a while; both crouched on the floor of the pilots' quarters. As they eventually released their hold on each other and pulled apart slightly, Lee kissed her softly on her lips.

The feel of his mouth on hers brought tears to her eyes as she'd resigned herself to never experiencing this again. She'd truly thought things were over between them. Of course she knew they were just delaying the inevitable, that they would have to continue their discussion sooner rather than later but she was prepared to wait. She opened her mouth to him as his tongue urged her to and their kiss deepened instantly. She wanted him badly and wished they had more time to continue this but she knew Sam would probably be back soon and the last thing they needed now was to get caught in the act by their other halves. Both were short of breath as the kiss ended and they stared at each other, thoughts flying rapidly through their minds. "Sam will be back soon." She whispered; almost apologetic for mentioning his name.

He nodded and lifted her from the floor, placing her gently back on the bunk. "Get some rest. I'll see you again soon, okay?" He kissed her on her forehead and she sighed peacefully. Suddenly she was really tired. She looked at him, his features swimming before her as the drugs gave one last concerted effort and won the battle she'd been fighting valiantly since coming back to the room. Her eyes drifted closed and he crouched watching her for a few seconds before standing and leaving the room.

TBC


	12. Chapter 5 part 1

**A/N:** So here we go - the last chapter... well the beginning of it anyway. I hope you enjoy it... let me know what you think.

This chapter relates the the episode "Take a Break From All Your Worries".

**Chapter 5: Possession.**

**Part 1.**

Since the Eye of Jupiter, things had settled back into a familiar pattern. It had been almost two months now and Lee and Kara were still sneaking around; seeing each other whenever they could. The events of Kara's crash on the algae planet had scared them both a lot more than they'd thought it would. Faced with the prospect of losing each other; both had been forced to realize they didn't want the other to not be in their life and yet they were scared to admit it to the other.

Since he'd come back to Galactica Lee had started to try and deal with the crew morale issue Karl had informed him of. He struggled for some time to come up with anything but the idea came to him one night as he lay awake in his bed thinking about things in general. He suddenly knew just what would increase morale. It was a dream he'd had at the Academy. In fact it was something he'd thought about doing when he was serving on the Olympia and was considering leaving the Fleet. They'd open a bar. Having had the idea approved by his father, Lee'd spoken to some of the refugees still based on Galactica and found a really great guy who was as enthusiastic about Lee's idea as Lee was. There was a part of what used to be the museum's gift shop they could use; they were ready to go. They'd even decided on a name for it. They were going to name it after its barman. It would be called Joe's. Work on Joe's was happening in great secrecy. Lee felt it would be a good plan to keep the idea under wraps for as long as he could; the air of anticipation surrounding the project by the rest of the crew had already raised the morale of the beleaguered crew. The only assistance he and Joe had were a few marines and two of Tyrol's deck crew. There were tables and chairs to locate and transport over without anyone seeing them. A pool table had even been built and Lee was still unsure exactly how they'd managed to get cues and balls for it but they'd appeared just a couple of days earlier. Most bizarrely of all he'd spoken to Sam about sorting out a Pyramid hoop to be put in one corner and that was going to be ready just in time for the opening tomorrow.

Lee had insisted on being involved in the whole process; he found the work tiring and exciting and it meant he had a lot less free time because he was still doing his CAG duties leaving almost permanently drained. It did give him a valid excuse to not going home though which was an additional benefit. Things had deteriorated even further between him and Dee since the algae planet and he was still avoiding doing anything about it. As much as they could they carried on in the tense but steady silence that had become an additional member of their marriage over the last few months. Whenever they did speak, it usually ended up being an argument so both tried as much as they could to steer clear of it. A lot of relationships on Galactica were currently suffering, probably as a result of the increasingly stressful situation they were in; especially after their run-in with the Cylons so the sooner the bar was ready to be opened, the better for everyone.

The relationship between Sam and Lee had strangely improved since the algae planet having managed to build a mutual respect for each other after their joint mission to protect the temple. You could almost describe them as friends. Almost. Of course there were certain subjects that weren't mentioned. Well, really only one subject, the subject of Kara was avoided as if their lives depended on it; which to a certain extent they both felt it did.

The night before Joe's opened Lee was running late. He was walking quickly down a corridor in the bowels of the ship and rounded the last corner to his final destination. As he slowed his step he saw just ahead of him the person he was rushing to meet. Kara. He smiled as he set eyes on her and she returned his smile. He swept her into his arms once he reached her and swung her round. She kissed him deeply, wrapping her arms and legs around him. This was the first time in several days they'd been able to spend any time with each other. He walked them into the empty room, closing the hatch behind them. It was the same room they'd met in after the dance all those months ago. The room held a special importance to both of them. It was a place they came to as much as they could to meet each other and several times had spent the night there so they could be alone together.

"So, how's the secret project going?" She asked him with a smile as he slowly lowered her feet to the ground. It was something that intrigued her a great deal. He wouldn't tell her what he was doing; all she ever got when she asked him anything about it was a wry smile. That didn't stop her asking though. She also found it frustrating that she couldn't convince him to tell her what was going on and she'd tried every method of persuasion she could to get him to reveal to her what he was up to. The sex embargo she'd put in place just a week earlier very nearly got him but she caved in before he did; simply unable to go any longer without feeling that connection with him. As she gave in he just smiled that small wry smile at her and then set about frakking her intensely for more than an hour. Even remembering it now sent a shot of desire through her.

"Actually, I can tell you all about it now." The smile she'd grown to hate on his face.

His answer stunned her. She really hadn't been expecting him to say that. "You can?"

They sat on the bunk in the room and she leaned her head on his shoulder. Her hand slipped into his and he gave it a squeeze. He took in her profile as he started to tell her all about it. "I'm doing something I've always wanted to do." She quirked an eyebrow at him in question. "We're opening a bar. It opens tomorrow evening."

"A bar." She looked at him, a smile on her face. "Really? Where's the alcohol coming from?"

"One of the ships in the fleet has set up a distillery. We're trading with them for some of what they produce, Tyrol and his team are going to update their FTL drives and overhaul their engines in exchange for a regular supply."

"Wow. We'll make a politician out of you yet, Lee Adama." Her smile had broadened as she heard his explanation. "So what else does this bar have to offer?"

"There are tables and chairs, a pool table and Sam managed to arrange a Pyramid net for one section."

"Sam?" Her smile fell from her face.

"Yeah. Don't worry about it Kara, I saw him the other day. Things between us have changed recently; we get on okay now; we just don't talk about you at all." He kissed the top of her head and she squeezed his hand. "Anyway, how's your hand? You had your last check-up with Cottle today didn't you?" Kara's hands had seriously held her back from performing her duties since the algae planet. Both hands had been severely burnt in the fire when the Raptor crashed but her left hand was much more badly damaged than the other. There had been some nerve damage which had needed some intricate surgery by Cottle to try and repair it and it had taken a lot longer to heal than either one of them would've liked. When Cottle had operated on her, he'd truly been worried that she'd be unable to fly and would have to resign her commission. Ever since the surgery she'd been getting intensive physio to regain some level of flexibility and co-ordination in her fingers. The whole time had been difficult for Lee to deal with as he was unable to show just how worried about her he really was. He was just her CAG as far as most other people were concerned and so he'd had to hide it from them all. And as each obstacle arose, Lee had grown more and more worried about her. It was just another in a long line of things that had been playing on Lee's mind recently.

She lifted her left hand and waved it in front of him, clenching it a couple of times. "He's happy with the progress I've made and I think he's even more relieved to get rid of me as a patient." The smile was huge on her face, the relief she was feeling also obvious.

"Does this mean, you're cleared for duties and I can put you back on the flight roster?"

"He thinks I should fly Raptors first before going back into a Viper." Her smile was gone from her face now, replaced by a small frown.

"Are you going to be okay with that?" He knew she was concerned about flying again. They both were. She'd had a couple of nightmares since the crash where she dreamt she was trapped in the ship again and all of the consoles were burning. Both times it was when there'd been a relapse with her hands and her future had been preying on her mind. She'd been quite fortunate as Lee had been with her both times she'd had the bad dreams and he'd held her in his arms, reassuring her and trying anything he could to calm her down. He'd been there both times because with each setback both of them needed comfort from each other in order to deal with the next hurdle she faced. Each nightmare had scared him more than he'd let on to her as a Starbuck that was scared of flying was like a fish being out of water and it was something he hoped he'd never have to face.

She shrugged. "I don't know really. I guess we'll see."

"Do you want me to be there with you for your first flight? I can probably arrange it if it'll make you feel better." She shrugged against his shoulder. His arm, which was around her waist, pulled her over so she was sitting on his lap. She wouldn't look him in the eyes and he used his hand to lift her chin to look at him. "Hey, look at me. Everything will be okay, Kara. You're a fantastic pilot; my best pilot, or so you keep telling me. You need to remember that."

"I'm just worried I might freak out when I'm out there."

"So let me organize it so I'm there with you. If you do, I'll be there to help you through it. I don't think you will, flying comes naturally to you but maybe having me there will give you the reassurance you need."

"I don't want people to think I need a babysitter out there."

"Then we'll make it so they think I'm there to assess your performance. I really don't care what they think, Kara. I just want to you to feel okay when you're out there."

"I remember now why I love you." This was one of the first times since the algae planet that either of them had really said those words. It was as if the sentiment was embargoed from their relationship; they both steered clear of saying it if they could. Lee had murmured it to her a couple of times when he was trying to calm her down after her nightmares but she'd been far too upset to really absorb what he'd said. She stared at him wide-eyed and he looked at her, trying to judge if she meant it and how he felt about what she'd said. He leaned forward and kissed her softly, his hands moved into her hair, cradling her head in his hands. The passion built as the kiss lengthened.

Lee broke the kiss and rested his forehead against hers. "I love you too, Kara."

Kara smiled at his words, feeling the small buzz in her body as she realized she wanted this. She wanted to be with Lee. Maybe she should think more about what she was going to do with her relationship with Sam. She'd hardly seen him since she'd come back after her crash. He'd been moved to another ship so she didn't run into him quite as frequently as he would have liked. Of course this had pleased Lee no end. His competition had been removed. The only times Sam had really been around was when she'd had the surgery on her hand and the first couple of days after. Kara hadn't wanted him there and had hated the whole time he was around as she'd wanted Lee there; in fact eventually she'd sent Sam away. Kara also hated the fact Lee was still with Dee; never forgetting the only reason he was there was completely her fault. There was definitely no love lost between the two women, the situation was worse now than it had ever been. Ever since her drug induced ramblings in the Raptor, she'd been persona non grata with the communications officer and Kara was convinced several other people, who worked with Dee, were also ignoring her. Kara couldn't say she was particularly bothered by any of it. She had the better end of the deal. She had Lee… well, mostly anyway. Nevertheless he was still married to Dee and Kara was scared to mention anything to him about the fact she wished he wasn't.

Lee began to remove her uniform as she continued to stare at him. She smiled as his hand grazed her breast when he removed her tanks. They stood and he continued to undress her. She let him do it; she liked it when sometimes Lee would take control of things and it gave her more of a thrill when he did. She watched him pull his clothes hurriedly off his body once she was naked; again appreciating his body as it was gradually revealed to her. She could never tire of this, every time she was with him, she was reminded just what it was about him that made it so special. There were times when he could be so gentle with her and then other times he would be more… domineering and those were always good times. She wasn't sure which one she really preferred; it normally depended on what her mood was.

He pushed her backwards once they were both naked and she kept backing up until she had her back against the wall. He'd stayed standing in the middle of the room watching her as she backed away from him. Her desire was increasing as they both stood staring at each other. He began to walk over to her; almost stalking her as he approached. She stood where she was, not moving at all as he got nearer. His hand touched her thigh and she shivered. She was taking shallow breaths, waiting for him to make the next move. She was expecting him to be the aggressor after his earlier actions and was taken back when he leant forward and kissed her tenderly on the mouth. She returned his kiss, relishing the feel of his tongue in her mouth and the way his hand was cradling the back of her head, so she didn't bang it against the wall. This side of Lee was just as welcome to her. There was something that was so protective about the way he was with her when he was like this. It was a trait she would find annoying if anyone else were to be like that with her. With Lee it made her feel safe and loved.

He was already beginning to harden against her and she thrust her pelvis towards him, causing him to growl. He broke the kiss and stared at her seriously. She gave him a confident smile but he just carried on looking into her eyes, studying her. Some of her confidence disappeared when he didn't return the smile and she began to worry, fear creeping into her eyes. "Lee?"

He pounced on her, kissing her fervently, thrusting his tongue assuredly into her mouth. His hand gripped her thigh and he pressed his body against hers. Her pulse was racing and her thrill increased as he lifted her leg so it was wrapped around his waist. His cock was now pressed much closer to her centre and her excitement escalated. He was still giving her bruising kisses; this was the first time he'd been as forceful as this with her since the algae planet. Kara was incredibly turned on just from the way he was now sucking on her neck and biting at her skin. He was edging slightly lower until he was kissing and licking her breasts. He hadn't shaved for a couple of days because he hadn't had time to really do so and the added encouragement for him to not do so was because he knew she liked it when he didn't; so he now made sure his stubble scratched at the sensitive skin of her breasts. She moaned softly which prompted him to brush his face against her skin again. His cock was now rigid and as he pushed forcefully into her Kara pulled her other leg up around his waist. He held her in his arms and pressed her against the wall behind her. Her arms were over his shoulders and draped down his back. She could feel the muscles in his back rippling as he pressed himself in and out of her.

Lee felt like he was on fire. He was so turned on by what Kara was allowing him to do it only increased his desire further. He had gone back to kiss her mouth once he was inside her and the kisses were delicious. Her mouth, that usually gave him so much trouble; was now so kissable and he took as much pleasure as he could from doing it. He hoped she was enjoying this as much as he was. She seemed to be responding as if she was; but he could never predict how she'd react.

Kara was close to orgasm, she just needed a little something to push her over the edge. She tried to change the angle he was in her by lowering one of her legs but as soon as she moved it he pulled it back up. She pulled her mouth from his, gasping for air. "Gods, Lee." He stroked her face with his hand and her eyes met his; his eyes were a dark cerulean blue that she'd never seen there before, "So close, Lee. I'm so close." He pulled her away from the wall and turned them around. Again she could feel the muscles in his body at various places where she was in contact with him. He dropped her from a short distance onto the mattress of the bunk, slipping from her as he did so. The drop forced all the breath from her body and she took some deep steadying breaths; trying to recover from the shock of him doing that and also because she was so turned on by the way he was acting. He was watching her again but she just wanted him to touch her. Getting tired of waiting for him to get back to where he should be, her hand slipped down and she started to touch herself, trying to find the elusive element that would push her over the edge. He watched as she pushed her fingers inside, moving them in and out. It wasn't working and she let out a frustrated moan which caused Lee to smile at her. He got onto the bunk, sitting at her feet as she continued to touch herself. Her dissatisfaction was increasing and she was close to begging him to touch her. She screwed her eyes shut and fought down another moan of frustration which was trying to escape.

Lee finally gave into her desperation and placed his mouth on her, licking her slit deeply. His tongue brushed against her fingers which had stilled inside her as soon as his lips touched her. He took her wrist in his hand; moving it away thereby pulling her fingers back out. He set about his task of pleasuring Kara. He pulled her legs over his shoulders and pulled her down, closer to him. As he continued to lick her, the bridge of his nose rubbed against her clit. He could tell she liked what he was doing as her legs had clamped on his head, her hand was also on the back of his head, ensuring it stayed in place. He smiled against her as he felt her fingernails scratch at the skin on his skull. He moved his mouth to concentrate on her clit, rather than neglect her there too much; he inserted two fingers into her. His hand was bigger than hers and the roughness of his fingers was causing her to begin to grip him as they moved in and out of her. She moaned as she felt the stubble on his cheeks and chin brush against her clit and she pressed his head against it harder. He looked up at her face and was surprised to find tears falling down her face. He pulled his face away from her, "Kara?"

She looked at him and smiled through the tears. "Please Lee. I need you in me. Please."

Lee had never seen her this way and he was taken back by the depth of emotion he saw in her eyes. Her legs fell from his shoulders and he moved himself up so he could kiss her. They could both taste her on his lips and in his mouth as they kissed each other. His hand had stilled within her and he knew he needed to do what she'd asked and get back in her but he didn't want to break the kiss. Kissing her now seemed even more important than it had before. He gasped into her mouth as she reached down and took his cock in her hand. It was soft on his skin and she moved it up and down his length, at times gripping it tightly until he was once more fully erect. It was Kara that placed him at her entrance and Lee pushed into her in one movement. He'd pulled his fingers from her as he moved into her and now used his hand to raise one leg up to her chest; changing the angle he was moving in her; enabling him to get a little bit deeper. He could tell she was very close again and he tried to hold her back just a little so he could join her at the same moment. He could feel the pressure building and pooling in his groin and knew the end was very close. He opened his eyes and found Kara looking at him, her eyes still bathed with tears. She smiled at him softly as he stared at her and she'd never looked as stunning to him. He wished she could always be like this for him. He wished she would take the risk and opt to be with him for eternity. He wanted her. He wanted her badly. The more time he spent in the cold, sterile atmosphere with his wife, the more he knew how he felt. It was Kara he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He just needed to try and convince her of that. As he finally admitted this to himself he thrust into her once more and he was pulsing into her, feeling her body clutching him tightly as she fell with him.

They lay in each other's arms as the bliss ebbed from their bodies, both thinking the same thoughts, not realizing the other wanted the same thing just as much as they did. For all the movements forward they'd made in their relationship it had made little difference to the way they were with each other. There was still a barrier to communication about the important issues between the two of them they seemed unable to break through.

TBC


	13. Chapter 5 part 2

**A/N:** The last part of this story. Thanks to everyone for the reviews so far and particularly to StarryEyedGlimmer who's comments caused me to think about this part - and double it in length! Please review and let me know what you think about this and the story as a whole.

**Chapter 5: Possession.**

**Part 2.**

It had been forty eight hours since Lee had last seen Kara, a very long forty eight hours. It had been a busy couple of days as the final push to get Joe's ready before the opening ceremony had gained momentum, followed by the opening night attended by a vast amount of the crew. Lee had been right it had been just the morale boost the crew of Galactica had truly needed and the reception by all those who'd attended was rapturous. Lee had felt immense pride at seeing the smiles on everyone's faces as they'd realized just what it was they were seeing. There had been a queue around the room to get drinks from the bar and Joe was run off his feet all evening; never had the man been so happy – at least not since before the Twelve Colonies fell anyway. They had done a roaring trade that first night and Lee was a little worried there wouldn't be enough alcohol to last the first week, never mind any longer.

Lee had noticed one absence from the opening night though. Two if he counted Kara; who'd ended up having to cover someone's shift in CIC at the last moment, disappointing them both a great deal as neither Dee nor Sam were going to be there so it would have meant they could spend the time together. The other missing party was Galen Tyrol, who the whole crew would owe a great deal to over the coming months. Lee was determined he should partake in an evening at the bar as it would be thanks to Tyrol and his team that they'd continue to receive the alcohol that was apparently very needed. With this in mind, he'd gone to see the Chief on the flight deck and found him crawling under the belly of Hotdog's Viper working to repair the damage it had incurred in another skirmish with the Cylons. "Chief, I thought you'd be virtually finished by now."

The Chief pulled himself out from under the Viper and wiped his hands on a cloth as he rose to his feet. "I'm just finishing up. I wanted to get this repair done before I left for the day." He turned back to face the ship. "It's not like I'm exactly desperate to get back to quarters anyway." He muttered; loud enough for Lee to hear though.

Lee smiled, "Well, if that's the case, I may have just the solution for you."

"Oh yes?" Tyrol had a blank expression on his face. He obviously had no idea what Lee was talking about.

"You weren't at the crew gathering last night, were you?"

"No. I had to get back to Callie and Nicky last night, Nicky was running a fever yesterday and we'd both been up all night the one before that. There was quite a buzz about whatever it was this morning, but I've spent most of the day either in sickbay with Nicky or crawling under several Vipers. Did I miss something?"

Lee smiled. Was the Chief in for a surprise? "Come with me, Galen. Just wait until you see what I have to show you." Tyrol nodded and followed Lee from the flight deck and down the corridors; trying to work out what the CAG was up to. The Chief was getting more bemused as they continued to walk, there seemed to be many more people milling around than he would normally expect to see in this area of the ship. Everyone seemed to have smiles on their faces, especially when they saw his current companion; after a couple of minutes, Galen was more confused than ever; even more so given his lack of sleep over the last few days.

Finally rounding a corner, Galen saw a sign with the word 'Joe's' written across it which caused him to raise an eyebrow at Lee in question. A question Lee ignored; just urging him to carry on moving towards Joe's. They walked further and he found they were walking into a bar. "You've got to be kidding me." Lee shook his head and led the man across to the bar.

"Hey, Joe." Lee beckoned the bartender towards them with a wave of his hand and a smile.

Joe walked towards them, knowing who Lee's companion was even though they'd never met. Galen Tyrol was one of the Gods as far as Joe was concerned. "Chief Tyrol, welcome. Any friend of the Major's is a friend of mine, which means you get the good stuff." A quick smile was flashed in their direction. He quickly pours them a drink each before walking away to serve someone else.

"Thank you very much. Don't mind if I do. I'm not going home tonight, so…" Galen quickly picked his glass up and took a sip.

Lee glanced at the Chief quickly, wondering if things were as bad for the Tyrol's as they currently were for the Adama's. "Why? You and Callie have a fight?"

"You didn't hear us? I figured we could have sold tickets." He looked at Lee; amusement obvious on his face. He raised his glass and proposed a toast. "Er, to marriage. Why we build bars." He downed his drink quickly. Lee did the same, both wincing as the alcohol hit the back of their throats. It was definitely the good stuff.

"Yeah." Lee looked left and right, eyes settling on the person he was looking for. "Joe!" More drinks soon appeared. And it wasn't long before the two of them had consumed a lot of alcohol.

****

Lee staggered into his quarters, trying to quietly shut the hatch behind him and failing miserably. He was drunk. Actually he was more than drunk, he was absolutely blasted. The alcohol Joe had given him was lethal stuff and he knew he'd be suffering in the morning. He saw his wife wasn't asleep anyway and immediately felt the tension overtake the room as they geared up for another fight. Maybe he wouldn't have to wait until the morning before he began suffering. Lee decided to bite the bullet and spoke first. "You're up late." She shook her head as she watched him meander his way to the locker and hang up his uniform jacket; fumbling slightly as the hanger fell from his hand on his first attempt. She turned her attention back to her paperwork. "You know, the Chief says hi." Lee said; a smirk on his face.

"He one of your new drinking buddies?" She couldn't hide the disgust from her voice; and the disappointment. She'd expected so much more from Lee than his current behavior was showing. Her disdain for the bar had grown over the weeks as it had pulled him further away from her; which was something she didn't think possible. It was increasingly difficult for her to believe Lee could get any further away from her and yet he seemed to have managed it with ease. It was more than the bar though that was coming between them; she knew what the real problem with their marriage was; or Lee's problem with it anyway. His problem seemed to be with his wife; or maybe it was the fact she wasn't a certain blonde pilot who seemed to hold his attention much more than she ever could. They both tried to hide what was going on between them but it was so obvious. They were doing a lousy job of hiding it from her or Sam and part of her was beginning not to care anymore. It didn't say much for the state of their marriage.

"You know, I would invite you but you made it very clear it's not your thing."

"No. It's your thing and that's not what I was asking." Suddenly she was very tired; tired of having her husband treat her as if she didn't matter and tired of having the same discussion over and over again.

He knew what she was asking and he wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of replying. The tension in the room was getting to him and he was suddenly very tired. Of course that may also have had something to do with the alcohol… "I have a briefing at 0500."

"Are we still on for dinner tomorrow?" There was a hint of hope to her voice and yet he could tell she was preparing herself to be disappointed by him once more. Dee wasn't sure why she was so desperate for them to go through the pretense that their marriage was okay but somehow she kept hoping that if she believed enough that everything was okay then it would all work itself out. She just had to get Lee to believe that now as well.

He sighed, knowing that for once he would have to do the right thing; however much his heart was telling him not to. Apart from anything else he'd been hoping to see Kara tomorrow – another missed opportunity. "Yeah."

She smiled slightly and he tried not to wince at the look he saw on her face. He tried to concentrate on the conversation but the last few days were finally catching up with him and exhaustion was taking over. "Cos I already switched watches."

"Sure." Why she continued to carry on talking was beyond him, he'd already agreed to meet her. What more did she want? Unfortunately he had a strong suspicion he knew exactly what it was she wanted and Lee was determined she would be disappointed. Lee just wished she'd stop her inane chatter.

She paused for a few seconds, wondering if she should really push the issue. She just had this suspicion he'd let her down again. Let's face it; it wouldn't be the first time. "It'd just be nice for a husband and wife to occasionally…" she finally looked at him and noticed he'd fallen asleep. So much for that then. "Forget it."

****

Kara walked into Joe's. It was only the second time she'd been there; having missed the opening night as she'd had to spend an extra shift in CIC. It'd been extremely frustrating at the time as she'd been looking forward to seeing just what it was Lee had been doing for almost every waking moment since returning from the algae planet. She'd been able to go there the second night it had been open and she'd marveled at what he'd achieved with such a small team of people. It was obviously just as appreciated by the rest of the crew as well as the bar had been packed when she'd arrived and it was little different tonight as she walked through the entrance again. As she'd done the night before she quickly scanned the room; looking for one person; always the same person. Lee.

The night before he hadn't been there and she'd had to fight the disappointment again at not seeing him but there were other people for her to talk to and drink with and she'd had a good time. She'd enjoyed the alcohol; it was nicer stuff than they'd been drinking for many months and had the added benefit of not be algae flavored. Last night she hadn't been able to stay very long as she had the early shift the next morning. More bad luck on her part today as she was on the same shift again tomorrow as well. She'd been frustrated by the fact Lee still hadn't been there when she'd left last night. Today she hadn't seen him since the briefing first thing that morning and before that it had been when they'd met the day before the bar had opened. She wished more than anything she could see him; she wanted to feel him hold her in his arms. She wanted him to make love to her; slow, gentle tender love.

Now as she looked around the room again she saw him near the far end of the bar. She couldn't help the smile that flew to her face as her eyes met his. His eyes shone and a similar smile was on his face and then she saw a flash of guilt ebb onto his face; washing away the smile as quickly as it had appeared. She wondered why he'd be feeling guilty but soon knew the reason as she saw his wife standing right next to him; gazing adoringly at her husband. Her heart fell and she knew her emotions would be written clearly all over her face. She was still staring into his eyes and he was watching her just as intently.

Karl appeared at her elbow and she was grateful for the distraction as her heart was pounding as a result of the feelings she was experiencing. "You okay, Starbuck?" His voice was quiet but she easily heard his question and the subtle questions that weren't being asked.

"I'm fine, Karl." She looked at him, a broad smile on her face, "Do you want a drink?"

"Sure." They both walked over to the bar; automatically steering clear of the Adama's and she ordered them a couple of drinks each from Joe. They stood at the bar, their backs to it as they watched the people in the room. Kara looked at Lee every few minutes; it wasn't that she wanted to see him with Dee but she couldn't help staring at him as they sat eating a meal at a table on the far side of the room. Lee was facing towards her and Dee had her back to the bar which Kara found a relief. Karl kept up a steady stream of conversation and she sort of paid attention to what he was saying, adding a yes or no in what she hoped were the appropriate places.

Karl could tell she was hardly listening to a word he said but carried on the pretense. He could see she was staring at the CAG and could see from her face she wasn't particularly enjoying being in this room. She'd been relatively happy since they'd left the algae planet; even when she'd had to go through some of the worst few days she'd ever had to face after her hands were so badly injured. Karl had been keeping an eye on her for months now; ever since she'd rejoined the crew after her New Caprica experience with Leoben. At times she hadn't wanted him interfering in her life but eventually she'd realized he was just being her friend. He'd seen the developing relationship between her and Lee as it began just after the dance and hadn't commented on it to her or anyone. The affair was a foregone conclusion as far as Helo was concerned; it had been predestined to happen ever since she'd rushed into marrying Sam Anders. In the usual way Starbuck ever approached anything; she'd made a decision that would affect the rest of her life before she'd really thought it through. She'd known Lee for more years than she'd known Karl and yet she'd rushed into marrying a man she'd known barely five minutes when everything was pointing to a relationship starting between the two pilots. She'd seemed happy when they'd first married but after the Cylons took hold of the planet and she'd been taken hostage, Karl hadn't been the only one to witness her misery when she returned to Galactica after the exodus.

Most of the pilots had seen the rows that frequently happened between the two and they weren't the only ones who were fighting. Times had been tough ever since the Fleet had left New Caprica. After the dance though, things lightened a little in Kara's demeanor. He'd suspected then that something was going on between the CAG and his lead pilot. He'd seen the subtle looks they'd shared in the Rec room; and the sometimes not so subtle heated stares as well. He'd noticed the times when they'd both been missing; when no one had been able to find them or explain their absences. Karl had also seen how miserable she was when Lee was down on the planet during the Algae mission. It was during this time his suspicions were confirmed and he'd been more than willing to force the situation so the two of them could spend some quality time together. Both Lee and Kara were his friends and he wanted them both to be happy. He knew them both well enough to know this would only happen if they were together; he just wondered how long it would be before they came to realize this as well.

Kara was feeling so miserable. This wasn't how she thought she'd be spending this evening. She wished she could force herself not to look at him. She didn't want to see him with his wife; she hated that woman with such passion. There was nothing about her she liked. Mostly though she resented her being with him and the fact it was all her fault only added to the feelings of self-loathing she had. If she hadn't left him that morning on New Caprica; if she hadn't panicked and run back to Sam; things could be very different now. She could see Lee look at her every now and again and she wondered if he was feeling the same way. Part of her hoped he wasn't – because she wanted him to be happy and if that meant he wanted to be with Dee and not her then she'd have to learn to live with it. Somehow. It wouldn't be easy though.

She turned to face the bar and downed the last of her drink. "I'm gonna call it a night. I've got early shift tomorrow." Karl watched her face and nodded at her in understanding. She turned and started to walk out of the bar, looking at Lee again as she moved quickly out of the room. Lee watched her go as well and Karl turned his attention to him once Kara slipped out of sight. It was really disappointing as far as Karl could read it; Lee seemed as unhappy with the way things were as Kara obviously was. Karl couldn't understand why they refused to change the misery they were both wallowing in and just get together. Sure, it would be difficult initially; it would be uncomfortable for the whole crew as the two marriages tore apart but Karl was sure the rewards of the two pilots being together would soon be felt by all. It sure as hell would beat all this sneaking around. He looked at Lee again and saw the tense atmosphere between him and his wife. Anything had to be better than the mess they were all currently in.

****

Kara walked slowly down the corridor. She hadn't really needed to leave as early as she had but the thought of watching him for another hour or two, sitting there closely with his wife was too much for her. She could feel her throat tightening as the emotions began to overwhelm her and she swallowed; trying to push them back down where they belonged. She had no right to feel this way; he was a married man and she was someone else's wife. She shouldn't be feeling jealous about the fact he was spending time with his wife rather than her. But she was. She was jealous. As she neared the pilots' quarters she finally admitted she wanted Lee to herself; she didn't want him to be with anyone else. She thought back to their argument on the algae planet and knew she'd had the perfect opportunity to get what she wanted only she hadn't realized then that it was what she wanted. For some reason Starbuck and not Kara made her presence known; and it was Starbuck who'd replied to Lee's question. She could've had him but there was a small part of her psyche that just wouldn't let her have some happiness.

She was about to walk into quarters when an idea came to her. It wasn't the perfect solution but it would at least give her the opportunity to stop thinking about Lee; for a little while at least. She turned and walked further down the corridor. She found what she was looking for and lifted the handset from the wall. The call connected straight away to the CIC. "Can you put me through to the Rising Sun?" The line clicked and her thoughts drifted to a time when she'd gone over to that ship several years ago. It was meant to be a simple night off duty but turned into one of the worst nights of her life – and she had several to compare it to. It was the night she'd shot Lee; the night she almost killed a second Adama. It was also the night that made her realize just how much he meant to her. She'd known there was something between them before; hell she'd worn a dress for him on Colonial night and she'd called out his name when she was being frakked by another man but even then she'd just thought it was lust – nothing deeper than that. Seeing him falling to the ground as the bullet struck his shoulder had seemed to happen so slowly and yet it had also passed in a flash at the same time. It was the moment when she'd been forced to realize her feelings for him. She'd wanted to go over to him and tell him she was sorry; tell him he meant everything to her but something held her back. Dee had been there that night as well and she'd also been there in Sickbay whenever Kara had shown up to see him. And Kara had gone to see him a lot. Many more times than she would've done if he was just someone she lusted after. Of course Lee didn't know she'd been there; she'd made sure of that. Even now he still didn't know.

The handset crackled to life as the call was connected to the other ship and she asked to be put through to her husband. Their conversation was short. It wasn't conversation she wanted and Sam knew that. It wasn't what he really wanted either but there was something about this call that tugged at his nerves more than usual. Sam ended the call with the promise to get a flight over to Galactica the following night. He loved Kara a lot and yet there were times, like now, when he hated her in equal amounts. Sam knew what was happening between Kara and Lee and part of him couldn't blame Lee for loving his wife. He understood it because he also felt the same way about her. He'd noticed the looks the two of them shared ever since the first time he'd met Lee. He would have to be blind not to see it. Even the first time he'd met him it had been obvious. They'd been in the pilot's quarters and both of them were a little drunk; celebrating the successful rescue mission from Caprica. Lee had walked in and he was about as uptight as any officer could ever be in Sam's opinion. There had been disdain on Lee's face and Kara's taunts had done nothing to ease the situation; the tension had really peaked when Kara teased him about his relationship with the woman who was now his wife. Sam should've known then just what would happen between the two pilots but he'd been so wrapped up in his feelings for Kara, he hadn't noticed. Sam shook his head as he made his way back to the Pyramid game he'd been playing. Despite everything he was still going to go to Galactica the next day. She may not love him; he wasn't even sure of that these days; but the sex was great even when she was hardly participating – which had been an increasing occurrence recently. Maybe it was time he asked her where this was going. Maybe it was time this ended; he just wasn't sure it was what he wanted anymore.

****

Lee walked into the gym and found Kara there. He'd been looking for her in various places around the ship and he was pleased to see there wasn't anyone else around. Finally they were alone. He shut the door and dogged the hatch quietly. Now they wouldn't be disturbed. He walked over towards her; fairly sure she hadn't noticed him enter the room. He undid his jacket and pulled it from his body, dropping it to the floor leaving his body just covered by his tanks. As the buttons hit the floor, Kara looked up; pausing from hitting the punchbag and holding it between her gloves. She smiled at him the instant she realized it was him. "Lee."

He walked over and stood next to her and kissed her sweaty forehead. "Kara." She leaned forward and placed her head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry about last night." He added quietly.

She shrugged. "It doesn't matter."

"It does matter, Kara. I don't ever want to see you look hurt like you did last night. I wanted to be with you last night more than anything. I wanted it so much and being with Dee was the last place I wanted to be."

"I've missed you a lot over the last couple of days. I thought I'd finally get to see you last night. It hurt to see you with her. I know it shouldn't, but it did."

He pulled her into his arms and they stood that way for several minutes. "You can see me now, if you want to." He whispered against her hair.

"Is it what you want, Lee?" The last few days had made her lose her confidence slightly.

"Yes." His voice was husky as he spoke and a pulse of desire hit her hard.

She pulled away from him slightly and he looked at her with concern. She lifted her hands and rested the gloves against his chest. "Show me." She whispered.

He didn't move for a fraction of a second before he stepped forward and pressed his lips against hers. His mouth was so soft against hers she became quite lightheaded as the tenderness he was showing had an effect through her. He pulled her arms deliberately around his waist, knowing there was little she could do with them until he took the gloves off for her. Lee wanted to prove to her how much she meant to him. The last time they'd been together it had been more about controlling her; dominating her, if you like. This time he wanted it to be different. He wanted it to be tender, gentle and heartfelt.

When the kiss ended they stared at each other and she smiled at him shyly. "Do you want me to take your gloves off for you?" He asked. She nodded at him and in turn, he took each hand in his and removed the glove surrounding it, carefully unwinding the bandages around each one. Once the hand was unwrapped he bathed it with kisses, caressing it with his mouth in the way he'd wanted to be able to do ever since she'd crashed the Raptor. "Cottle has done such a good job with this one," he said softly as he inspected the left one with his lips.

Once her hands were free she cradled his face in each one and moved in for another deep kiss. A kiss Lee returned with as much passion as she gave. His tongue was in her mouth and she hummed as it brushed against hers. "Make love to me, Lee." She barely whispered.

He smiled against her mouth as he resumed kissing her. Her hands moved to his pants and her fingers nimbly opened the fastenings and pushed them down his legs. Lee forced off his boots and then pulled his feet from his pants. He pulled her towards him and she could feel his arousal squashed between them. His length was straining against his underwear and her desperation to feel him in her increased astronomically.

He stepped back and her heart fell a little; a hint of rejection threatening to push away all of her previous desire. His hands moved to her shorts and soon she was feeling the cool air hitting her bare skin as he removed them and her underwear. His mouth had gone back to kissing her; this time concentrating on her neck and shoulder. He bent forward slightly and lifted her from the floor; an arm sweeping her legs up under the knees. He stepped towards the bench press and laid her gently on the cushioned surface. Lee wanted to be in her so badly now but held back a little, determined to take this slower than they usually did.

He rose back to his feet rather than crouching at her side and he quickly removed his underwear. She watched him intently; her eyes shifting to look at his cock as it sprang free from its confines. His tanks were pulled over his head and he strode back to her. Her sports bra was the only barrier they had remaining and both worked to pull it from her body.

Kara had expected him to be as forceful with her as he'd been last time but he was being so gentle it brought tears to her eyes. This was just what she wanted and needed. He knelt at her feet and tugged her gently down the bench. It wasn't long until two fingers were pushed gently into her. Lee bent forward and kissed her stomach as his hand moved within her. Her back arched off the bench as desire shot through her. She licked her lips; trying to find some moisture and failing miserably. "Lee…"

Lee glanced up at her and he faltered slightly as he saw her lick her lips. Another throb of desire swam through him and he began again to kiss her softly. His need to be in her was so strong now. He pulled his lips reluctantly from her and also removed his fingers from her too. She moaned softly in disappointment and looked at him; wondering what he was doing. Lee rose to his knees and his cock was at her entrance. He stared at her intently and he took a deep breath as his desire reached another notch higher. Ever so slowly he pushed himself into her, feeling her encouraging him in as eagerly as he wanted to be there. Again she arched her back off the seat as her need was finally met. His groin met hers and for a moment time seemed to stand still. He was finally home; just where he wanted to be; where he wished he could be forever.

Lee's hands gripped her hips and he began to move in her; the pace as slow as he could force himself to go. She tried several times to increase his speed but he wouldn't let her control what he was doing. She sighed each time he pushed back into her and the small sound made his heart swell.

Kara wanted to touch him; she needed to be more involved in this. She shifted slightly, raising her body up onto her forearms. He looked at her, "Are you okay?" he asked, softly. She nodded before holding a hand out towards him. His movement stopped and a hand reached for hers. Once he'd taken hold of her hand she used it to pull herself upright. Her free arm snaked around his neck; pulling his head towards her so she could kiss him deeply. They were both moving slowly against each other now; Kara having realized this was how she wanted it as much as Lee did. Lee pulled her from the seat and onto his lap; reveling in the contact he now had with her. Each stroke within her felt incredible. His emotions for the woman currently residing in his arms were escalating as the seconds passed. Gods how he wished he could convince her to leave Sam.

Kara pulled her mouth from his and rested her head on his shoulder, shutting her eyes as tears threatened to pour down her cheeks. This was amazing. She felt closer to Lee now than she ever had. Sex with Lee was always good; the only thing she could clearly remember from the night on New Caprica had been the overwhelming memory that it was fantastic. Each time since this affair had started had only reaffirmed that. This time though was so much more than ever before. She'd been so eager to go fast when this started; loving the intensity that always gave her but she'd quickly realized that wasn't what Lee intended or wanted. At first she'd tried to change his mind and when he stopped her from doing so she was initially upset, wondering if he didn't want her anymore. Hard and fast had always been what she was known for. Slow and gentle was more his wife's style and that bothered her a little. She quickly grew to appreciate the way this was. Now she was sitting on his lap, moving slowly in tandem with him she knew this was what she'd really wanted. She'd wanted this closeness to him and maybe showing him she could be this way would be beneficial to her as well. Maybe it would help him agree to what she wanted.

His hands were tracing gently up and down her back; feathering his fingers across the delicate skin he'd come to cherish. He could feel she was close to coming and he was in the same position; just as near to completion as he could be but he wanted this to last. Hell, he wanted this to last forever. No sooner had he thought this and his cock pulsed within her; shooting his seed deep into her. Kara cried out softly against his shoulder and she clenched around him as she leapt over the edge with him. His hand moved to her head and cradled it in his palm; his mouth kissed her hair as he continued to throb in her. He groaned as he felt her body pulling him into her. "Gods, Lee. This is so good. I needed this so much. I needed you so much."

Her words increased his desire again and her fingers ran through his hair; nails scratching at the surface of his skull as he pushed into her again deeply. He couldn't speak straight away as he battled the emotions she'd just sent shooting through him. He swallowed several times as she began to move against him again; spurred on once more by his movement within her. "Lee Adama loves Kara Thrace," he whispered into her ear. It was enough to send them both over the edge again; a smaller peak this time for them both but a peak none the less.

She lifted her head from his shoulder and moved so she could look into his eyes. She could see the emotions deep within the blue whirlpools before her. She bit her lip; feeling similar emotions growing in her. "Kara Thrace loves Lee Adama as well. More than she's loved anyone in her whole life. I don't want you to ever forget that, Lee. Never forget it."

He stared at her; scared by her words as it sounded very much like a goodbye to him. He didn't want to believe it; he'd thought things would be different this time. He looked into her eyes and hoped for a second he wasn't misreading the emotions in them. He wanted to believe what she'd just said but he wasn't sure he did. She seemed to change her mind on a daily basis and he wasn't sure he'd ever truly believe her unless she ended things with Sam. Lee kissed her deeply; trying to tell her just how he felt about her. He stopped moving within her now and she pulled away from him a little. "I won't ever forget, Kara. Whatever happens between us, I'll always remember that you loved me."

"Loved?"

"I'm just being realistic, Kara. We both know this won't last forever."

She got to her feet; pulling off him and hurriedly began to get dressed. "Are you trying to turn this into a fight, Lee?"

"No, Kara. Fighting is more your style, not mine." He wasn't sure what he was doing. Why was he pushing her away? This wasn't what he wanted. In fact this was the last thing he wanted.

She was going to cry. She knew it. She just needed to get away from here as fast as she could so she didn't have an audience when it happened. "Get dressed, Lee." He was watching her carefully as she pulled her clothes rapidly onto her body. "Either you get dressed, or I'm going to walk out of this room while you sit there for any crew to see in all your glory." She swallowed as she pushed the tears away a little longer. "I don't know why you're pushing me away, Lee because that's not what I want but you've got your wish. I'm going to go now. See you around, Lee." She started to walk to the hatch and he quickly got to his feet. For a second she thought he was coming after her but he was only taking heed of her words and was now quickly putting his clothes back on. She strode out of the room and down the corridor; eager to get away from her best friend. She found a supply closet nearby and quickly moved through the entrance to it. As soon as she shut the door, she slid to the floor as she surrendered to the emotions she'd been valiantly battling for the last few minutes. She pulled her legs up to her body and huddled in a ball as her body began to shake and tears coursed down her cheeks. She wished she could pretend she wasn't in love with Lee but she couldn't. The fact she could smell him on her skin as she sat there wasn't helping her quickly fraying emotions.

Lee stared at the exit to the room after she'd left it. He was still dressing; automatically going through the motions of normality he was so used to portraying. What had he just done? She was right he had pushed her away and he wasn't sure he knew why? Even that thought was a lie as he knew it was because he was scared he'd get hurt if he let her get too close but the reality of the situation was she was already close enough she'd hurt him whatever they did. He didn't want to lose her and he knew he probably just had. He'd pushed her back towards her husband; the guy he'd been desperately trying to like; an attempt that almost worked as long as he pretended he wasn't Kara's husband. Sam would never be a friend though; it was just Lee doing his best to maintain a civil atmosphere between them.

****

Kara and Sam were in the pilots' quarters, sheltered in the depths of her bunk with the curtains shut from the rest of the room. They were sitting at opposite ends of the bunk having just got dressed after their 'get-together'. Kara was trying to remember why she'd thought it'd be a good idea to call him over, it wasn't like she'd wanted to see him; not really; at the time though she'd had an itch that needed scratching. She'd been lonely after seeing Lee at Joe's and yet not really seeing Lee. She'd realized Lee wasn't available so she'd gone for second choice. She smiled as she realized how she'd just referred to her husband. Second choice; just how she'd referred to Dee at the dance all those months ago. Now though it just reminded her of what she'd just lost; the smile falling quickly from her face. The time with Sam was nothing in comparison to earlier with Lee. She swallowed quickly as memories of their fight urged back into her thoughts. The bottle of ambrosia swung from her hand, having taken a swig from it a couple of minutes earlier. She turned her focus back to her husband, wondering just why he put up with her. "You're being awfully accommodating."

"Is that how it looks to you?" His face was hidden from the light and she couldn't see it to measure what he was feeling.

She smirked, trying to decide if she was trying to frak him off or not. She might as well, she'd already lost Lee tonight. "Your estranged, two timing bitch of a wife calls you up for a quickie and you hop on the first shuttle. I'd say yeah."

He stared at her. Something seemed off with her tonight. Her mood seemed to have changed since she'd called him the night before. He didn't speak for a minute as he continued to look at her in the small amount of light pushing its way through the gap in the curtain, "I've been thinking about some stuff, Kara."

She wasn't sure she wanted to know where this conversation was going but knew it was too late to back away from this now. "Yeah, like what?"

Sighs, "I… what that crazy skin-job Leoben said about you and your special destiny. Now what if there's something to that?"

Definitely didn't like where this was heading. Talking about Cylons wasn't her conversation of choice. Especially considering the frakked up day she was having. "Kara Thrace and her special destiny? It sounds more like a bad cover band, Sam."

"Think about it though. Why did I survive all those months on Caprica; waiting for you to return if I was just going to walk out on you. And you, did you go through that hell, locked in that fake house with that fake husband just so you could ditch me? I don't think so. Now when I think about it like that…" He paused for a second, staring at her face, trying to see if he could work out what she was thinking; if he had the guts to ask her the question he really wanted… needed to know the answer to. He swallowed quickly. He had to ask it, he needed to know; for him. Even though in his heart he knew what her answer was going to be. "Do you love him?"

His question stunned her. She hadn't been expecting that; and she certainly wasn't sure she knew how to answer it. "What?"

"Lee, Kara. Do you love Lee?" He had resigned himself to her answer; was expecting it and sat looking at her as she thought about what he'd just asked. What was taking her so long; the answer was obvious. He knew it. Hell the whole fleet probably knew it. He wasn't a complete idiot; despite how his wife treated him. He knew Lee loved her; it was written clearly across his face each time he saw him. Sam understood how he felt. It was very difficult not to love her. You'd be a fool not to. And Lee was no fool. He wasn't sure he was ready to hear her say that she loved him back though.

"Gods, Sam." Silence. Finally she spoke, her voice quiet but he heard every word as if he'd been hit over the head with a hammer. "Maybe. I don't know." That was a lie. Really she wanted to say something more along the line of 'Yes, yes… YES!!' but memories of how Lee had reacted earlier made her not want to lay her emotions out before her again.

"Then you got to go to him." Sam wasn't sure what it was that made him say it. He was officially calling time on their marriage. A decision that was possibly long overdue. Somehow he'd always known it would end like this and he'd guessed it would be him to take the final step not Kara. Despite all her bravado; she was more vulnerable than she cared to admit. Lee would be good for her. He'd challenge her and she'd let him; something she'd never let Sam do. Sam was convinced they'd have a long future together; despite the risks they were forced to take regularly because Starbuck and Apollo always had each other's backs.

She hadn't expected him to say that either. She'd thought he'd put up more of a fight for her, not push her in the direction of his rival. "Sam," she shakes her head, thinking about what he'd just said to her. She'd never thought Sam would give in like this but then she'd never thought Lee would give in as easily as he'd done earlier either. Having said that if he was in the position Sam was in; maybe things would be different. It was redundant for her to think that way now; he'd made his decision and she was going to have to learn to live without him… or Sam apparently.

"I gotta get going. This was fun." She pulled him back into the bunk as he moved past her and kissed him. "I love you." He murmured before he again turned to go. She watched him begin to leave, pulling back the curtain to reveal the bunk to the room. She pulled on his arm as he was about to leave and gave him a soft kiss; a gentle and tender goodbye. She felt him slip something into her hand as he kissed her back, before hurriedly leaving the room. She watched him go, ignoring the looks on the faces of the others in the room as they stared at her. She was sure they'd know exactly what had just happened and they'd easily be able to read the emotions written over her face. A few of them would probably think it was just the loss of her husband she was mourning but really it was the loss of her best friend and lover she was most upset by. Finally she looked down to her hand and saw her tag; the one she'd left with Sam on Caprica, hanging from a chain, similar to the one she had round her neck. She closed her eyes and inhaled sharply at the impact of his action fought with those she was already feeling.

****

"I thought you were off duty."

Lee could see where this was heading before he'd even spoken. Another row. She'd been pushing for a big one for days. Even the dinner the previous night had been difficult. There'd been several stilted silences and even when they'd spoken they could hardly manage any real conversation. They daren't talk to each other while they were out because both knew it would end in a row and neither of then was prepared to do that with an audience. The thing was Lee didn't want to have a row now. He was still trying to comprehend what had happened with Kara earlier. He really needed a drink. "I am. I'm just gonna stop by the bar for a little while."

"If you're going to see Kara, just admit it." Her tone was sharp and accusing.

"Look I told you, there's nothing going on." It was almost a lie; but technically wasn't given the row the two of them had had earlier. In fact that was probably one of the most truthful things he'd said to his wife in the last few months. He was sure things were over with Kara but he didn't want to end up being alone. Even being with Dee was better than being with no one; maybe. He wasn't so sure these days. The silence and the fights were wearing a little thin and Lee just tried to avoid it all as much as he could. It was no way to live.

"You both told me. Lee won't cheat, he's too noble." She was mocking Kara, he knew it but he couldn't say anything. "The only problem is it's all a crock, isn't it…"

He'd had enough. There was only so much he could take and finally it was too much. After the events of the last few hours he was teetering on the edge of a precipice; his emotions fraught as he was now having to face up to the fact he wasn't going to have her. The most galling thing though was this time it was his fault and not hers. He turned his attention back to his wife. All he got from her were accusations and, yes alright, they'd been justified as it turned out but he wasn't going to admit that. For the first time in a very long time, Lee hit back. He wasn't going to be the doormat Dee relied on him being. It was time he finally stood up for himself. He may be in the wrong in this situation but she was at fault just as much as he was. He needed her to realize that. He decided it was his turn to accuse her of some things. "Do you know what the problem is? The only problem is that you don't trust me. That's it. And this is just your own frakking insecurities talking. Same as always. I mean right from the get-go… I… the very first morning that I proposed, I mean… you know what, forget it. This is… this is frakking pointless."

For several seconds the room is silent, neither moved as they stared at each other sternly. She looks away first and sighs. He turns; worried that if she were to look at him again; she'd see the truth in his eyes. She'd see how fragile he was feeling. "No, you're right." He turns to face her. "I did see this coming. And I was naïve enough to marry you anyway. And you want to know why, Lee? Because I loved you. I loved you so frakking much. I thought I was lucky. That's right. Lucky… that I could have you for just as long as you or Kara would let me."

"Dee… come on." This was painful. It was only adding to his pain. He just wished it would all end. Her voice was getting on his nerves. Most things she did these days managed to do that but this was even worse. The silences he usually hated so much were suddenly more than welcome.

"It's not a marriage, Lee. This is a lie. You want to be with Kara? Go ahead; I won't stand in your way. It's over."

He swallowed quickly. That was unexpected. She was letting him go just as he'd lost Kara. The Gods had an ironic sense of humor. She turned and started to walk out of the room. Suddenly losing her seemed something he wasn't sure he wanted as well. "Where are you going?"

She turned to look at him one last time, before leaving the room. "I'll come back for my stuff later today; when you're on shift." Her eyes held tears in them as she looked at him for the final time. "Bye Lee." She walked out of their quarters and Lee wasn't sure how he felt; stunned more than anything else. It had fast become a frakking spectacularly bad day. He was alone and when he thought about it now; he realized he was relieved. It suddenly didn't seem quite as bad as he'd thought it would be. The real problem was he'd probably ruined everything with Kara and now he had the opportunity to be with her. Could he take the next step he wanted to so much? He wasn't sure. More importantly would Kara let him? He was fairly sure he may have burned that bridge as well. He needed to think about it all. And thinking was what he was good at.

****

It had been an odd couple of days. Lee had avoided Kara for well over a day since Dee had moved out. He'd used the time alone to think about things and he'd made some decisions. It actually hadn't been that difficult for him to not see her as she'd seemed to be just as determined to avoid being in the same room as him as much as she could. That seemed to have changed now though as Kara had finally cornered him as he was walking back to his office from CIC. For the first time since the dance they were uncomfortable with each other and Lee wasn't sure he liked the feeling. She wouldn't look him in the eyes and he needed to see her face to try and judge what she was feeling; to ascertain if he had a chance with her. She'd started talking a couple of minutes ago, but she'd been rambling ever since. He'd lost the thread of the conversation shortly after she'd begun as she spiraled from one topic to another and he tried once more to work out what she was talking about. "What are you saying?"

She knew she'd lost him pretty much instantly and she took a deep breath; trying to build up the courage to say what she'd been trying to say since she'd finally managed to find him. It had taken a lot for her to come and see him; the last time they'd spoke was still in her thoughts. She'd thought about little else ever since; that and how she could try to get him back. She'd realized before the day had even ended she was going to fight for this. Actually she'd been thinking about how to say this ever since the conversation with her husband just days earlier. She released her breath gently and then spoke slowly to him, her voice echoing in the room. "If I leave Sam, will you still leave Dee?"

Time seemed to stand still as her words reverberated around the room. He wanted to believe her, he really did but could he? Much as he wanted to; his previous hesitation was high in his mind. He knew he needed to vocalize it. They were going to get no further with this if they didn't start talking to each other and listening to what the other said. "My Gods, Kara. You know, how do I know that tomorrow you're not going to pull another one eighty. I mean these are our frakking marriages we're talking about. It's not some stupid dogfight we can just jink our way out of." His breath was coming in gasps. He couldn't believe he'd just said that to her. Once more he was acting like an idiot. He should be grabbing the opportunity as it was offered to him on a plate. Why was he finding it so difficult for him to believe her? Was it just that he was scared she'd hurt him again or was it something more than that?

She couldn't believe the disappointment she felt at his words. "Think about it, Lee. That's what you're best at." Her voice was a little bitter as his response had hurt her more than she thought it could. She was stupid for letting this hurt her again. She should've known it wouldn't work out. She turned and started to leave the room.

He reached for her and grabbed her hand in his, pulling her back towards him. "I don't need to think about it." Her eyes rose to his as he spoke. His grip was tight on her hand and his eyes were a steely blue that shook her to her core.

"You don't?" Her voice was quiet; hesitant.

"No. I know what I want."

"You do?" She could hardly breathe as she contemplated just what that was. She was scared to even think it could be good news. She started to prepare herself for the rejection she knew was probably imminent.

He pulled her closer and she began to hope, just a little, that everything would be alright. His other arm went around her waist. "I want you. I always have done and I always will. I thought you'd have realized that by now. I was stupid yesterday. I panicked. I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you." As soon as he'd finished talking, his mouth was on hers, softly kissing her, lingering to explore her mouth as she opened it to him. He moved from her mouth, across her face, edging nearer and nearer her ear. "What made you change your mind? You seemed so opposed to it the last time we spoke about this."

She decided to finally open up to him and reveal more than she usually would. "I've been thinking about it ever since the algae planet. I think I realized then that I didn't want to lose you." She stopped speaking taking a steadying breath, "I thought I'd be okay with things being the way they were before but I don't want to share you. I don't want Dee to be the one who gets to go to bed with you every night. I want to wake up in your arms every morning and not feel guilty for doing so. I… I want you, Lee, more than I've ever wanted anything else."

"Wow." That had been more than he'd expected from her. Each word she'd said pushed the fear he'd been feeling into recession. He kissed her again; worshipping her mouth with his; hoping it was enough to get her to forgive him for the way he'd behaved days before.

"So you'll sort things out with Dee then?" There was hope in her voice; hope she tried to tamp down in case she just got disappointed again.

"That won't be a problem." He looked down, slightly ashamed of what he was about to admit. "Dee left me the day before yesterday. We had one final row and she decided she wasn't what I really wanted. It turns out she knows me better than I thought she did. I'd been edging towards making this decision ever since the dance but when she went, it was a relief. All I've done since she left was think about everything and I knew she'd made the decision I wasn't prepared to make."

"Why weren't you?"

"I was scared I guess. I didn't want to push you away and risk losing you altogether. When we'd talked about it a bit on the algae planet, you seemed really against it, so I knew I would have lost you for sure. Then I almost lost you completely the other day by pushing you away from me. I don't even know why I did it. It wasn't what I wanted to do."

She smiled at him. "You're going to have to try harder than that to lose me, Lee. I'm going to fight for this as hard as I can. I might have balked at the idea initially but once I knew what I was doing and what I'd be losing, it was an easy decision. The other day just made me realize more how much I want this; how much I want you." The kiss was soft and gentle and they soon got caught up in the moment.

Lee reluctantly moved away from her and pushed some of her hair from her face. "We should go and see my dad; we need to tell him about this before he hears it from someone else." A worried expression washed over her face. "What's wrong?"

"Do you think he'll be okay with the two of us?" She looked really worried and Lee couldn't work out why she would be.

"Of course he will." Lee smiled at her tenderly.

"I'm not his favorite person, Lee. I haven't been since New Caprica."

"Kara, he's forgiven you. Gods, he probably loves you more than he loves me. Don't worry about it." He kissed her softly on the end of her nose.

"Aren't you worried about what he'll say about you and Dee?"

"A little, but if he wants me to be happy then he needs to get used to idea that I won't be with Dee. If I'm going to be happy, I'm going to be with you." Kara blushed at his words.

"We'd better go then, before one of us changes our mind."

"Well now that you mention, I can think of one thing I'd rather be doing." There was a smile on his face.

She took his hand in hers. "Later, Lee." He playfully pouted before her, hoping she'd relent. "All good things, comes to those who wait, didn't your mother ever tell you that?"

She released his hand and ran from the room at a jog, knowing he'd soon follow her. Sure enough he was soon just behind her and he lifted her over his shoulders as she shrieked with laughter. He carried her down the corridor before placing her tenderly on her feet and they walked quickly towards his father's quarters. Facing the future together and knowing things would be better from hereon in.

THE END.

**A/N2:** Ta Da! Like I said at the top of this epic - please review.


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